GenX Adulting Podcast
Real People. Real Stories. Real Conversations. From Every Generation.
Hosted by two GenXers
GenX Adulting Podcast
The Queen of 80s and 90s Nostalgia - Carmen Q. Gollihar: Content Creator - Episode 78
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She Quit Teaching to Make 80s and 90s Skits. Now She Has Over 3 Million Fans.
Carmen Q. Gollihar left her teaching career to make nostalgic 80s and 90s comedy skits, and built an audience of over three million. But there's far more to the woman behind the wigs, the big fonts and the unforgettable characters. In this episode of GenX Adulting, Carmen sits down with us for a conversation that's every bit as heartfelt as it is hilarious.
Born in 1976 and raised in a big Mexican-American family in Texas, Carmen walks us through a fiercely independent Gen X childhood, the classic Gen X work ethic and the winding road from the classroom to full-time content creation. She talks about why Gen Z is so obsessed with the 90s aesthetic she recreates, and how she built a loyal following on pure authenticity, real props and sets and zero AI shortcuts.
She also opens up about the harder chapters: years of infertility that led to building her family through adoption, the heartbreaking loss of her older sister and a candid warning about the dangers of prescription medication, and her brother's life with schizophrenia, as well as why she's determined to help break the stigma around mental illness. Add in real talk on hormone replacement therapy and thyroid health, imposter syndrome, Hispanic superstitions, and protecting your work from content theft, and you've got one of our most honest, wide-ranging conversations yet.
Funny, vulnerable and unmistakably Gen X. If you love a good reinvention story, or you’re one of Carmen’s loyal fans, this one's for you.
Check Out Carmen Here:
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Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carmenqgollihar
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/carmenqgollihar
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Real People. Real Stories. Real Conversations. From Every Generation.
Hosted by two GenXers
GenX Adulting Podcast (00:15)
Welcome to GenX Adulting. And today we have Carmen Q Gollihar content creator, with us. Welcome, Carmen.
Carmen Q Gollihar (00:22)
Thank you. Thank you for having me.
GenX Adulting Podcast (00:24)
We're so excited to have you and meet you. This is such a treat for us. Our first question is always: what year were you born?
Carmen Q Gollihar (00:32)
I'm a nineteen seventy six baby.
GenX Adulting Podcast (00:34)
Okay, so you're Gen X. Yeah. No, no, no. No, I don't even
Carmen Q Gollihar (00:37)
Totally yeah, for sure. I'm like, don't say don't give me that Xennial or whatever they're coming up with. Like, don't don't do that to me.
GenX Adulting Podcast (00:45)
think even with the Xennial, I don't consider seventy six in there.
Like I feel when I think of Xennial, I think I honestly think of seventy-nine to like eighty-two. But I bet you somebody's gonna come on and say, No, it's seventy da da da. But I just think that's it's those last like that last those last two years and then like the first couple of years. I seventy six to me feels right in the heart of the size. Yeah. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (01:09)
Yeah. I I remember an article years ago when that term Xennial came up and seventy-six was in it.
GenX Adulting Podcast (01:16)
Mm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (01:17)
And I was like, yeah, yeah, because the whole technology boom, like we were part of everything, you know, the whole
GenX Adulting Podcast (01:22)
Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (01:23)
but then now as like time has gone on and you know, now we're doing all this stuff with generations on social media, I'm like, no, I'm not a Xennial I'm Gen X.
GenX Adulting Podcast (01:32)
No, no, not at all. And even
with the older millennials, like there is some stuff that that we from our childhood that resonates with them. But then when we've interviewed them, I think, wow, it is different. They they definitely had a different experience than us. So they're kind of
Carmen Q Gollihar (01:48)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (01:48)
like the little siblings of Gen X. So okay, so where were you born?
Carmen Q Gollihar (01:51)
Yeah.
I was born in a small town called Floresville, Texas. And
GenX Adulting Podcast (01:59)
Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (01:59)
it's right near San Antonio, Texas. Actually I was we didn't have a hospital, so San Antonio I was born in San Antonio, but I I was born and raised in or raised in Floresville, Texas. It's c it's the peanut capital of the of Texas.
GenX Adulting Podcast (02:12)
Of the of the co
of the country or of Texas?
Carmen Q Gollihar (02:15)
of Texas country. I don't know. We we just caught i I think I know it's of Texas, but so we re we used to
GenX Adulting Podcast (02:20)
Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (02:21)
raise peanuts, of course. They're peanut a bunch of peanut farmers and a lot of our families, you know, our history is from peanuts and we have this big peanut festival and there's a king and queen and princesses and prince it's like a whole thing. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (02:34)
Okay. Is it kind of like a Hall
Hallmark town, like at Christmas time? Does it have that vibe? Like a cute little small town?
Carmen Q Gollihar (02:43)
It's a cute little small town. It is, it doesn't have that. it needs a little the town is actually they're working on it, and there's some people who are you know bringing it back and fixing up the town, and it it's become it's it's it's a cute little town, it's very homey. I love
GenX Adulting Podcast (02:59)
Mm-hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (02:59)
it going in. sometimes I'll take people, they're like, What is this? I'm like, it's a town, it's my town.
GenX Adulting Podcast (03:08)
What's the popul when
you were growing up there, what was the population about?
Carmen Q Gollihar (03:12)
four thousand. Yeah. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (03:13)
Okay. So it's a small town. So you
mentioned your family.
How many generations back? Like why Flor is am I saying it right? Floresville
Carmen Q Gollihar (03:22)
Yes.
GenX Adulting Podcast (03:23)
Wha ha why Floresville Like who from your family landed there?
Carmen Q Gollihar (03:27)
So gosh, my grandfather and grandmother, their parents came from Mexico in the early 1900s, and they actually lived near Floresville when they married and brought up the family there. So my dad grew up about 20 minutes away and then
My grandfather went and bought like just a bunch of land in Floresville because they were like up in I I guess like the town was forming. or it had already formed, but there was just lots of area. And so they wanted to live like in town because he was working in San Antonio at Kelly Air Force Base later,
GenX Adulting Podcast (04:16)
Mm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (04:17)
so to be a little closer. but they
They went there and his family, him and his wife, or my grandmother, brought up all the kids there at later on. Yeah, as some more
GenX Adulting Podcast (04:28)
Okay, w did he serve in the air force?
Carmen Q Gollihar (04:31)
No, he didn't serve. They just worked at Kelly. There was a lot of like a civil servants, I guess. Yeah. Yeah. So my grandfather
GenX Adulting Podcast (04:35)
Okay. Yeah. Okay. There's a whole civil workforce probably. So Okay. So he would
Carmen Q Gollihar (04:40)
and all his sons worked there except for my dad. My dad became a truck driver. My dad was like, I was too stupid to work there.
GenX Adulting Podcast (04:48)
Do
you know what they did there? At the base?
Carmen Q Gollihar (04:51)
I don't know what their
I don't know what their job was. I don't I don't know what they did. But it was like
GenX Adulting Podcast (04:56)
Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (04:56)
a whole thing and then like some of their kids worked there, so it was like a whole family thing. But
GenX Adulting Podcast (05:00)
Okay. It's like a generation
so probably a good good gig, right? So yeah. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (05:04)
It was a great gig and my
grandfather had a lot of money and was able to purchase like for the son like he purchased like a bunch of land for my like tios my uncles and stuff like that for their family so that they could build homes and stuff like that. So it was really a good move for him.
GenX Adulting Podcast (05:21)
That's awesome. So I assume does the Q stand for your that side of the family? Okay, Kington King Yeah. Okay. Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (05:27)
Yeah, Quintanilla And no relation to Selena. Actually her Selena
Quintanilla's uncle lived in Floresville so that was the only like close rel yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (05:36)
Okay. that's interesting though. That's there's a little connection there. Okay,
so do you know how your parents met? Like were they both from Floresville?
Carmen Q Gollihar (05:45)
So my mom is f from a town called Pleasanton, which is about fifteen minutes, twenty minutes away. And my dad my dad was a troublemaker when he was young. And so him and his friends, they would go like
It's to the little surrounding towns, like looking to like, you know, like let's go over here, let's go meet some girls
GenX Adulting Podcast (06:02)
Mm-hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (06:03)
and this and that. And actually my father was friends with my mom's sisters because they were they were a little older and they were older than my dad too. So but he just hung out with them, didn't there was nothing and then he saw my mom at a a soda shop.
And he told his friend, my god, that girl is so beautiful, I'm gonna ask her out. He's and the friend was like, No, she's white, and you can't do that because my dad's Mexican, right? And and
GenX Adulting Podcast (06:34)
Right, right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (06:35)
so they're like, Cause that's not allowed. And then so he goes, I'm gonna go talk to her, I don't care. When he spoke to her, she started speaking in Spanish, and he was like, She's like, I'm Mexican, you know? And he was like, jackpot!
GenX Adulting Podcast (06:47)
wow.
Carmen Q Gollihar (06:48)
This is allowed now.
'Cause she was light skinned with green eyes and yeah. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (06:52)
That's so funny. Okay. wow. Now was she
a hundred percent Mexican? Is
Carmen Q Gollihar (06:57)
Yeah, yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (06:59)
that common for the green eyes?
Carmen Q Gollihar (07:03)
yeah, it I mean it's just there in Mex right, we have a lot of Spaniard mixing in Mexico. So like a so when we did our DNA, our family actually came from Spain and my gosh, what's that country right next to Spain? I always forget. Portugal, yeah. So we have like a lot of Portuguese and sp and and Spaniard, and then they
GenX Adulting Podcast (07:19)
Portugal? Okay. Okay. Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (07:25)
eventually came down. I met some
gentleman were I I used to work at a huge construction company years wh when I graduated college and his last name was Quintanilla and so he kind of told me how like the family migrated from you know down yeah so we were actually related in
GenX Adulting Podcast (07:40)
Interesting. That's really cool.
Carmen Q Gollihar (07:43)
some way it was crazy it was it was wild but yeah
GenX Adulting Podcast (07:46)
That that is crazy. Okay,
how long so they start dating? do you know how long they dated until they got married?
Carmen Q Gollihar (07:54)
they dated for maybe two years. She got married at s they she got married at sixteen.
and
GenX Adulting Podcast (08:01)
And then did they settle in
Floresville or did they settle in her town?
Carmen Q Gollihar (08:06)
In Floresville They they actually bought some they their land was next right next to my grandparents. So,
they lived right next door and yeah, they helped my grandparents.
GenX Adulting Podcast (08:18)
The grandfather's probably
a bigger threat than the law. Or if he got past the grandfather hurt
Carmen Q Gollihar (08:22)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (08:23)
dad, then he's probably good.
Carmen Q Gollihar (08:24)
yeah, my dad had to go so when he introdu when he he went to the house to speak to my grandfather 'cause you had to do that to ask
GenX Adulting Podcast (08:33)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (08:33)
for, you know, to to date, he wasn't there and my grandma said, You have to go speak to Chewy, which Jesus I mean they called him Chewy. He's at the bar. and 'cause they there was a they he was in a blue bonnet baseball league.
GenX Adulting Podcast (08:51)
Mm-hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (08:52)
so it was like the older men would play baseball and then they would go out
GenX Adulting Podcast (08:54)
Mm-hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (08:54)
and drink afterwards. And so and she goes, But he I can already tell you he's gonna say no because nobody, you know, the mom was the youngest, so the answer's gonna be no. He goes, Well I'm gonna go anyway. So he went over there and
He went into the bar, he bought a beer, and he bought one for my grandpa and they started talking and then he says, by the way, you know, I am I am I I love your daughter and I want to date her. And he's like, okay. He's like, okay.
GenX Adulting Podcast (09:26)
you know what? Smart move. That is smart. Buy
buy a few rounds, you know, make friends and go either way, right? If you
Carmen Q Gollihar (09:31)
Yeah. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (09:33)
get a little too drunk and true. You gotta say it before things go too far. Yeah. Well, yeah. Of course.
Carmen Q Gollihar (09:36)
And he was seventeen buying buying Yeah, it's everything was
different, yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (09:42)
Everything had nerve. Yeah, absolutely, that he had the nerve to do that. Okay, so it
sounds like your grandfather on your paternal side, all that property he bought, was everyone living cl it's almost sounds a giant compound. Is everyone pretty close where they were living to each other?
Carmen Q Gollihar (09:57)
So
the
On our street where my parent my where I grew up, so there's one of my uncles on that side, and then another one of my aunts. So there was a few that were on that street, but what happened was there was a lady who owned the rest of it. And so they drove down to Corpus Christi, which was like three hours, two and a half hours, three hours away, to go try to buy the land from her, and she wouldn't sell. So he
GenX Adulting Podcast (10:25)
Mm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (10:26)
bought another strip.
for the others to live and then some moved away to out a couple of moved away out of state 'cause my my dad has my dad's number thirteen, fourteen, fifteen. There was fifteen kids in his family.
GenX Adulting Podcast (10:37)
Wow. Wow.
Carmen Q Gollihar (10:38)
So we have a huge family. yeah. So sh and then the lady
GenX Adulting Podcast (10:40)
Wow. Was every
Carmen Q Gollihar (10:43)
ended up selling later to someone else like but it was her Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (10:46)
my gosh. So
was everyone, all of those kids in Floresville all of his siblings and him, did everyone originally settle in Floresville
Carmen Q Gollihar (10:54)
So everybody but one, two he had twin sisters who moved away and then everybody else was there. Ec another sister who moved to San Antonio and then like there was like nine or ten of them that stayed in Floresville So Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (11:09)
Wow. So then
did your mom have a big family too, where she c the town she came from?
Carmen Q Gollihar (11:16)
She she's a she's the no, there's six there's six of them. she had th one, two, three brothers and two sisters. And
GenX Adulting Podcast (11:25)
Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (11:26)
her brother lived in Floresville. One of her brothers,
GenX Adulting Podcast (11:29)
okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (11:30)
the other ones lived in Pleasanton and two of moved out of state.
GenX Adulting Podcast (11:33)
So has did she ever talk to you about what it was like to enter into such a large family? Like that's that's well, she had six of five siblings of her own. Like that's a sign
Carmen Q Gollihar (11:45)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (11:45)
still a significantly larger family. I'm just wondering if it's like half the town population, right? I was wondering
Carmen Q Gollihar (11:50)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (11:51)
if if that was like intimidating for her at first to be entering into this family that had such a presence also in the town.
Carmen Q Gollihar (11:58)
Yeah. She she did she said growing up when she 'cause she was young when she came into the family and you know he had some siblings who were a lot older who were like more like parental figures to him because he's he was number thirteen out of fifteen so him and the other ones are real young.
But then they all got along and then like the there was the the oldest of my dad's siblings, my Tia she like the matriarch of our family and you know that's where my mom learned to like to really cook and to really do that was with her. so I mean they all got along. My my dad only says good things about my, you know, aunts and uncles and he just it it was just it was a great time growing up for me in a small town.
with all of them. I'm the youngest of forty-eight cousins. Yeah. So I yeah. So like I my name was baby Carmen because my mom's name was also Carmen
GenX Adulting Podcast (12:51)
That's amazing. You must have got doted on then.
Carmen Q Gollihar (13:00)
and a lot of them still call me baby Carmen. But the people that I grew up with are my cousins kids and that's who I went to school with. So my second cousins or first cousins twice removed or whatever once removed or whatever.
GenX Adulting Podcast (13:12)
Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (13:16)
but
So I went to school with them and there was like a group of us and it was one, two, three older cous second cousins who were boys and one who younger one who was a boy. So it was me and the four boys. So it was just it was shenanigans, but it w it was a lot of fun.
GenX Adulting Podcast (13:35)
That's that's awesome.
So okay, so they get married young. do you know, did they start a family, your parents right away, or did they wait a little bit?
Carmen Q Gollihar (13:45)
They started with my sister right away. My sister was thirteen years young older than me. she passed away back in two thousand eight, but she was she was older, the oldest.
GenX Adulting Podcast (13:52)
Okay. I'm sorry. Okay.
And then who was born after your sister?
Carmen Q Gollihar (14:00)
my other brother, his name is his name is Emilio. He lives in New York. And then I have another brother named Joe, we call him Anthony. His name is Joe Anthony, but we call him Anthony, and then it's me. And then I have
GenX Adulting Podcast (14:13)
And then you
Carmen Q Gollihar (14:15)
a nephew who's my sister's son, who I grew up with more of a as my sibling also, because she she
GenX Adulting Podcast (14:22)
Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (14:23)
got married young and then got divorced, and then they lived with us, so it was he was like my sibling.
GenX Adulting Podcast (14:28)
Okay, okay. So you
there was thirteen years between you and your sister. How many years then between you and your brothers?
Carmen Q Gollihar (14:37)
11 about 11 and a half with my other brother and eight with my closest brother. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (14:41)
Okay, so you were the baby. Cause that's a bonus.
Like we have one of those. we have twenty-nine, twenty-five, and sixteen. So the twenty-nine and the sixteen are thirteen years apart. We call him our bonus baby, our oopsie baby. But I mean
Carmen Q Gollihar (14:54)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (14:54)
'cause that 'cause you those those ages are your older siblings kind of jive and then you kind of slid in there. So it's like a little bit
Carmen Q Gollihar (15:01)
I was called a I wasn't called a
bonus, I was called the boo boo baby. And I even I even had
GenX Adulting Podcast (15:05)
Yes.
Carmen Q Gollihar (15:08)
that nickname from a couple of my cousins, my older cousins. Boo yeah. No, they call me boo boo.
GenX Adulting Podcast (15:12)
The boo boo baby. They called you boo boo? Boo boo. I like
that. I'm gonna start calling ours boo boo. Boo boo, yeah. I don't know. He's sixteen, I don't think that'll go. That wouldn't fit him too well, but Okay, so what did your dad your you said your dad was a trucker. Did he start that right from the start? Like after high school?
Carmen Q Gollihar (15:31)
yeah, he started trucking right away. So that was his job and he was he just he didn't like he worked for a company that in San Antonio where he would like go deliver like stuff to like other stores and stuff like that. So it was just like within within the a San Antonio, South Texas area.
GenX Adulting Podcast (15:44)
Mm-hmm. Okay.
Okay, so not like across the country or anything. He wasn't like gone
Carmen Q Gollihar (15:50)
Yeah, no.
GenX Adulting Podcast (15:51)
for and was your mom a stay at home mom?
Carmen Q Gollihar (15:54)
no, my mom worked. She they actually owned a restaurant afterwards. she stayed at home for a while and then they decided to open up a restaurant after my dad got into an accident going to work and he was hit by an eighteen wheeler in his car.
GenX Adulting Podcast (16:11)
my goodness.
Carmen Q Gollihar (16:12)
And so he was injured for quite a while and then so she went she of course was working and then later on they decided to open up a restaurant with two of my dad's siblings and then eventually it was just my mom and my dad for a while and then that's what they did for a while.
GenX Adulting Podcast (16:32)
That's a huge life change because she was home with the four of you. He's injured. Now sh when she had to go to work, what did she do initially?
Carmen Q Gollihar (16:42)
she worked I can't I remember I wasn't born yet. It was the three.
GenX Adulting Podcast (16:45)
Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (16:46)
So it was before I was born. I think I was born like a couple of years later. And I don't know what she did. I don't know if she worked in a r like in a r restaurant cooking or something, 'cause she's always cooked.
GenX Adulting Podcast (17:02)
Mm-hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (17:03)
but I need to ask her that what she did that time.
GenX Adulting Podcast (17:06)
And then who watched you guys? 'Cause your dad was injured, right? All the family?
Carmen Q Gollihar (17:10)
So my grandparents live next door. So my
GenX Adulting Podcast (17:13)
Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (17:14)
as Gen X, right? Like my siblings just like were there at the house and they just go to my grandparents' house. Yeah. And they were a lot older than
GenX Adulting Podcast (17:18)
Yeah. And you weren't born yet, right. Okay. Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (17:23)
me. So when I was growing up, I was there with my I guess I'm I I guess it was with my siblings, but I feel like I was alone a lot of the time. Like they were off doing their own thing and it was just me at the house, you know?
GenX Adulting Podcast (17:36)
Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (17:37)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (17:37)
Probably because of the age difference, right? That
you were still when you were little, they were starting to get old enough to go and be more independent and go out with that much family, not just in the town, but literally on your block. Do you did you do you feel like you had the latchkey kid experience at all? Or like were you feral at all? With that that many eyes on you?
Carmen Q Gollihar (18:01)
God, yeah, I was still like wild
as hell. Like I think about like the stuff that we did because it was such a small town and like having those close cousins, we just did whatever we wanted. And
GenX Adulting Podcast (18:17)
Mm-hmm. Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (18:18)
like I would go to the restaurant and I had a cousin who lived kind of next to the restaurant.
And I would walk over there and I would spend the entire day over there. And he and I would be gone. And no like nobody was like, where are they? Like, no, we were gone. We there was a st
GenX Adulting Podcast (18:35)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (18:37)
a storage unit back there. We were getting you like look shooting each other with BB guns back there. Like it was it was madness.
GenX Adulting Podcast (18:43)
Yeah. Okay, so you were
still out and gone. Now did you have the typical you need to be home when the streetlights come on, or is there a time for dinner, or was it more just show back up whenever?
Carmen Q Gollihar (18:59)
you know, when I was when I was younger and I would go to it was me and Polly, we would just be about. I would like when the it would get dark, he would walk me back, like to the restaurant.
GenX Adulting Podcast (19:12)
Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (19:12)
Because the restaurant was like my home. If i because
GenX Adulting Podcast (19:15)
Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (19:16)
we they were always there. so as I got a little older and I was like able to go do stuff, I don't
I didn't have a curfew. It was just come back. My parents knew I was with my boy cousins. So they're like, she's fine. You know, she's she's
GenX Adulting Podcast (19:35)
Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (19:35)
under in good and which I was. I was in really good hands. Like they wouldn't let anything happen to me. But that we were still causing chaos, you know? So huge tomboy. Huge tomboy.
GenX Adulting Podcast (19:40)
Yeah. Yeah. Yes, yes. Were you like were you a tomboy then in a sense? Hanging out with them? Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (19:50)
So like when I do my sk like if I do skits and stuff like that, like I have like
I I don't I never played with like little dolls like Barbie dolls and stuff like that. I played with them and their transformers and my own stuff, you know, like there were certain things that, you know, that are boy and girl kind of deal. But like I was my hair was always crazy. I was always dirty. I was always like knees and my pants like torn out. Like I was just always fighting with boys. Like it was just I was a like a tomboy.
GenX Adulting Podcast (20:23)
Yeah.
Well that makes sense because it sounds like even in school and outside of school you were mainly with your boy cousins. And so you kind of adapted, you know, to keep up with with that world. So you
Carmen Q Gollihar (20:34)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (20:35)
said they opened the restaurant. what kind of restaurant was it?
Carmen Q Gollihar (20:39)
It was a Mexican restaurant.
GenX Adulting Podcast (20:41)
And I'm so jealous. I know, that's his favorite.
My parents, they failed us there. Yeah, I knew you thought of that immediately when she said restaurant. So w did they do that before you were born even, the restaurant?
Carmen Q Gollihar (20:55)
no. I wanna say like in the late seventies, they started out with a it was a b they were selling barbecue. They had this little area with these big barbecue pits and they would sell
GenX Adulting Podcast (21:06)
Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (21:07)
barbecue from that and then they built the restaurant a little later.
GenX Adulting Podcast (21:11)
So your early formative years i is the restaurant. Like you probably don't remember much of not having the restaurant as a part of your life.
Carmen Q Gollihar (21:20)
yeah, so my yeah, it's we had the restaurant up until gosh, maybe I was right before how'd I've been right before middle school? 'Cause it it burned down. And so yeah, it was a whole
GenX Adulting Podcast (21:32)
my goodness, what what happened?
Carmen Q Gollihar (21:37)
It they don't I I that I don't even remember if it was electrical or if it was something like that.
GenX Adulting Podcast (21:40)
Mm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (21:42)
but you know what's funny is my best friend texted me today. She's like, Girl, the this she lives in Floresville. She's like, I can't it it's another restaurant now that they kinda like fixed up. She goes, it burned down. I said, That place loves to burn down for some reason. Yeah, it burned down. It burned down. It's the same restaurant, yeah, same location. So
GenX Adulting Podcast (21:57)
It's the same so another restaurant. in the same location. Okay. Wow.
Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (22:04)
My uncle
my uncle bought the restaurant after it burned down, he bought it from my parents because he wanted to continue. My parents were done. They were like, we're done with the restaurant. So my uncle was
GenX Adulting Podcast (22:13)
Yeah. Mm-hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (22:14)
like, we'll fix, you know, fix it up and we'll I'm gonna reopen it. Do you still want to do they're nah, we're done. And so he opened it, ran it for a while, and then like I guess a few years ago, somebody else bought it. It's been through different owners through over the years,
GenX Adulting Podcast (22:29)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (22:30)
you know, after my uncle passed away and stuff like that.
GenX Adulting Podcast (22:32)
That's crazy though. That's a little superstitious. I would think maybe there's like a ghost or something in there that doesn't yeah. Yes. Something doesn't
Carmen Q Gollihar (22:34)
Yeah. I that's what I thought. I was like this there's something there's something going on here. Like don't
GenX Adulting Podcast (22:41)
want okay. So then during your like elementary years and into middle school before it burnt down, was that where you would go after school? Like you would just or would you go into an empty house or would you go straight to the restaurant?
Carmen Q Gollihar (22:55)
I would go to the restaurant most of the time because my cousin was next door. Like
GenX Adulting Podcast (23:01)
Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (23:02)
down so that's where I would go. in the summer though, is where I would be at home a lot a l and with my brother Anthony, who was eight years older, but my was like having two reckless fools in the house because
GenX Adulting Podcast (23:17)
What
Carmen Q Gollihar (23:17)
he was like, I'm not like
We're fighting all the time and like it you know, even though he's eight years older, I was I was like the pain, you know, always bugging. So we were I was always calling the restaurant. I've done skits about calling the restaurant
GenX Adulting Podcast (23:26)
Right. Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (23:31)
about the cereal. Like we were always fighting over everything.
GenX Adulting Podcast (23:35)
Okay. And that was the summertime. That's funny. So
in the in the summer, like now of course kids have camps and everything scheduled and all that. When we were growing up it was like you go down to a river and you skip rocks all day, or you just walk around town or the neighborhood. There wasn't like that scheduling or those events that were planned for us. Was that the same for you in the summer? Were you guys just kind of free free all over the place?
Carmen Q Gollihar (23:58)
Yeah. We we just did whatever. Like so like when I was younger, my because so my brother would sleep in and then I was up early, because you know you're up early just
GenX Adulting Podcast (24:10)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (24:11)
making I I just remember like being on top of the counter making eggs. I was like five or six, like you know, like and
So there would be a point where he's like, Let's go, come on. and we would like walk through the town to get to the restaurant and then he was like, Here, stay here like I was on his nerves, you know. So then I would go to my cousin's house and then, you
GenX Adulting Podcast (24:29)
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (24:31)
know, then he and I were just like, whatever. And then as we got older
my mom still, you know, my mom would be off at work or so my dad and you know, and so we'd be at I'd sleep till like five in the afternoon or whatever, and then leave the house and wouldn't come back till like whatever time. And
GenX Adulting Podcast (24:48)
Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (24:48)
then one of my cousins, Johnny, who's two years older, he graduated and I was a sophomore going into my junior year. And I was like, hey mom, one day I was like, hey mom, I'm gonna go stay with Johnny because he's gonna go off to college. She's like, Okay. I didn't come back the rest of the summer. And we talk about this, he's What the hell?
heck like where was like his mom was there but she went off to Georgia to go visit family and was gone for a while so we had the run of the house and we were just like I don't remember the whole summer and like he had
GenX Adulting Podcast (25:15)
So you just stayed you stayed at his house the r whole summer?
Carmen Q Gollihar (25:20)
it he had he has two younger sisters but she took the youngest youngest with her and so
Leslie was like two years younger than me and we w we're just laughing like do you remember like we did this and like there was nobody there no wait. She left us with she was married to his step well, his stepdad and he was like young so like he was just like, Yeah, y'all have fun, like it's okay
GenX Adulting Podcast (25:43)
my
god. Did you guys have parties?
Carmen Q Gollihar (25:46)
We had parties, we went like at we would have parties there, we'd find a party somewhere, we'd make a
GenX Adulting Podcast (25:52)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (25:52)
sh party in a field, you know, the whole
GenX Adulting Podcast (25:55)
God. It's all yeah, kids
now don't know because everything's so regulated and reported and the phones, you know,
Carmen Q Gollihar (25:58)
Yeah. yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (26:01)
like if the kids it's hard for them to even organize a party now because they all see each other on Snapchat. They know what's going on. They can organize it, but then five hundred kids. Yeah, f yeah, too many kids show 'cause they see that
Carmen Q Gollihar (26:10)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (26:11)
ten kids are at one house, then like thirty kids like, let's all go to where the ten kids are. Where back then you could actually have a party and everyone in town didn't necessarily know what was going on. So it was manageable.
Carmen Q Gollihar (26:21)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (26:22)
So I feel bad for them that it gets a little more complicated.
So when you were in elementary school, were you involved in any sports or clubs or
art or theater or anything like that in those younger years?
Carmen Q Gollihar (26:35)
I was in little league baseball. We didn't have softball like for girls. So I was I played with boys the boys team. so I did that and it was just I did brownies for one year, which was not it didn't work because like it was a bunch of girls and it was just like so much like girl stuff, like and it nobody nobody wanted to wrestle. Nobody wanted to fight, nobody knew all like
GenX Adulting Podcast (26:52)
Yeah. Girl. Yeah, it's girl girl. Yes.
Carmen Q Gollihar (27:03)
They didn't want to play WWF with me.
GenX Adulting Podcast (27:08)
So wait, when you were playing Little League, were you the only girl?
Carmen Q Gollihar (27:13)
there was a I remember later on one of my friends, Michelle, moved in to the town, probably when I was in the gosh, fourth or fifth grade, and she was a tomboy.
GenX Adulting Podcast (27:25)
Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (27:25)
And we became like the best of friends, and she played little league. And so that was we were the two girls, and her sister played little league. She was a year younger. So we were the only ones that were on the little league, like baseball teams. so that was
GenX Adulting Podcast (27:39)
And it probably felt
so comfortable for you 'cause you had grown up so closely with boys. So you probably didn't even skip a beat with that but for you, how were the bo the boys on the team, were they accepting of having a girl on the team?
Carmen Q Gollihar (27:54)
Yeah, because it was it to them that was like they were used to me and who like I was.
GenX Adulting Podcast (27:59)
Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (28:00)
So it was like on the playground, you know, we'd play tetherball with the same kids and all that. So it was like Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (28:03)
Okay, yeah. Yeah. Now
w were your friends in elementary school mainly boys?
Carmen Q Gollihar (28:10)
I did have friends who were girls and I had and I did play with them on the playground. but it was like I I'm trying to think back to like like my first grade years. There was this one boy who he was my best friend and I and I like kind of the the character of Billy that I have
is kind of was formed around that boy, right? That Billy is my husband's name, but that's not the same person.
GenX Adulting Podcast (28:37)
Okay. Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (28:40)
So he and I were always together and always playing. And like he I he was my best friend and like I remember like we would go like after before math and buy each other a pencil. So we kinda liked each other too. So it's funny but
GenX Adulting Podcast (28:57)
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (28:58)
we were, you know, and that friendship was all the way to like
Sixth grade.
GenX Adulting Podcast (29:04)
Wow.
Carmen Q Gollihar (29:05)
And then like one day in sixth grade, I don't know what happened. Like, you know, hormones were changing, and something happened,
GenX Adulting Podcast (29:11)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (29:11)
and we got into like a we got into like a fight. And he twisted my arm, which we always did that, right?
GenX Adulting Podcast (29:17)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (29:17)
And but and he twisted it and I it was hard and I was like, Ugh. I don't I don't wanna talk to you anymore. Like I it just like I was done. Yeah, that was it. And then we stopped being best friends. I was like
GenX Adulting Podcast (29:23)
And that was it. That's
that's when you became a woman and you're like, ew. Yes, yes. Right. Yeah. Yeah. It's like you gotta think hormones, because that's all the answer to that. That poor kid had no clue. I know and he saw he's like, What just happened? Yes, yes, that's so funny. No, middle school. Does
Carmen Q Gollihar (29:28)
Yeah, yeah. And I started liking and I started liking like really liking like other boys, you know, like and I was like, I'm like, you're gonna treat me that way. Yeah. And he was like, we do this all the time.
GenX Adulting Podcast (29:48)
he does he are you guys in touch at all? Like, does he know that there's a character based on him?
Carmen Q Gollihar (29:53)
No. No. I haven't talked I haven't spoken to him gosh since graduation. So it was like after sixth grade, like I really didn't even like think about like hang like hanging out anymore. You know how like sometimes
GenX Adulting Podcast (30:03)
Yeah. You just
Carmen Q Gollihar (30:05)
when you grow up you have these best friends and then you're just done, you know? That's the way it was.
GenX Adulting Podcast (30:07)
Yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes.
my gosh. Okay, so through so you you did little league and then dabbled in brownies.
now what
Carmen Q Gollihar (30:15)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (30:16)
about in did you call it middle school or junior high?
Carmen Q Gollihar (30:19)
ours was called junior high.
GenX Adulting Podcast (30:20)
Okay, so in junior high, did you continue playing s little league or did you get into like theater or club or art or anything?
Carmen Q Gollihar (30:29)
Okay, so my so I went from the our school was odd, right? So we had elementary up until third grade and then fourth and fifth grade we had intermediate and then sixth grade we were supposed to go into junior high, but they got this great idea to build another school and they put it with the intermediate. So sixth grade I stayed in intermediate and still played little league. And then that summer
Was the last summer I played Little League because I went into seventh grade, which was junior high, and my friend Michelle, who was a tomboy, said, Hey, there's this softball team in Poth, which was five minutes a town, five minutes away. Let's play this summer instead of playing with the boys. Cause she and I were both on the same page where we were just like, now we like boys, right? Not not like like not like we did it before, but now we're kind of into boys, you know? So we didn't
GenX Adulting Podcast (31:17)
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes. Yes, yes.
Carmen Q Gollihar (31:23)
want to be with them because they were like everything was changed.
Changing with the whole
GenX Adulting Podcast (31:26)
Yes.
Carmen Q Gollihar (31:28)
we our our bodies were changing, and then like
GenX Adulting Podcast (31:30)
Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (31:30)
sometimes boys would say something, and I was like, I have to freaking punch you in the face now because you said that to me. Like, like you can't, you can't say that. Like, so we played on a girl softball
GenX Adulting Podcast (31:34)
Yes, yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (31:41)
team for that one summer, which was amazing because it was a bunch of tomboy girls. It was just
like we found our people.
GenX Adulting Podcast (31:51)
Yeah. that's awesome. And then did you play with them again or was it just that one summer?
Carmen Q Gollihar (31:57)
it was just that one summer because we we got into sports like on our at our school. So we played volleyball,
GenX Adulting Podcast (32:04)
School. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (32:06)
I played basketball, I did track in junior high, then you know, in high school, I did the same thing. And then like one year, I don't know what it was, we didn't me my other one of my friends didn't want to do track.
that year. So our coach was like, come play tennis. We're like, I've never played tennis. She goes, It's like volleyball. And we're like, what? And so like she showed us this thing and then sh my friend and I became partners and we like we won like district or whatever. It like fun. We're like, it's like volleyball. So we're like, okay. So
GenX Adulting Podcast (32:37)
wow. I never heard it
described that way, but that's actually a smart way to describe it to someone who is trying to grasp it. 'Cause if you already played volleyball, it's like, well there's a net. Now I just have to use this this different. Yeah, you have to hit that's the only thing in common though. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. So you were an athlete.
Carmen Q Gollihar (32:49)
Yeah. Yeah, the strokes was like the spiking stroke was the same as the the whole like yeah, so it was like it was pretty cool.
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (32:59)
You were an athlete. now having such a big family, and well, I mean, for a lot of us Gen Xers, having family come to anything wasn't common, like to cheer on where now all of us parents go to everything, but having such a big family, did you have a big cheering section at all your games and everything? Or was it the typical like no one was coming?
Carmen Q Gollihar (33:20)
it was a typical like no one was coming kind of deal. Like it wasn't like
GenX Adulting Podcast (33:24)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (33:25)
today, like where you have something and like you've got grandparents, you've got aunts and uncles, you've got all these people coming. So it was like my parents could when they could show up to whatever they could show up to, you know, they showed up to. I mean they came to stuff. My mom, you know, did. My dad was like,
He would show up every once in a while 'cause he had his thing that he had to do or whatever work and stuff like that. And you know, so
GenX Adulting Podcast (33:48)
Yeah. Did
you ever through all that have to work at the restaurant? Like were all of you expected to work there?
Carmen Q Gollihar (33:54)
Okay, so
I'm I'm going back into my thoughts and when I think that it burned down, I think it was maybe in the sixth grade, and I used to bus tables as a kid and that and and so I would just get a little something. But in the year that I went into seventh grade or eighth grade, my mom had to get another job. And so she worked with this one lady who had a restaurant in San Antonio. And that summer I became a waitress. I was 13 in San
GenX Adulting Podcast (34:24)
Wow.
Carmen Q Gollihar (34:25)
Antonio.
And so that's how I got money for school clothes 'cause my parents didn't have a lot of money, you know, at that time 'cause they you know, after the restaurant and all that stuff happened and, you know, it was
GenX Adulting Podcast (34:36)
Right. Right. And
so there must not have been that either wasn't on the books or were the laws different back then? I don't know because now it's fifteen. No, we were able to probably do anything, right?
Carmen Q Gollihar (34:48)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (34:50)
So it's either
Carmen Q Gollihar (34:50)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (34:51)
off the books or the laws. A hundred percent off the books. It had to have been. Yeah. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (34:53)
say that it was it was off the books and I was paid under the table at that time because
you know I I remember my parents saying well or and the lady you know she's like well I'll just pay you under the table. I just always remember getting paid under the table and so that's how
GenX Adulting Podcast (35:05)
Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Did
Carmen Q Gollihar (35:08)
you know
GenX Adulting Podcast (35:09)
did you have other jobs during high school after that? Or Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (35:13)
I was always a waitress. I I waitressed from
Aged, you know, 13, all the way to 18. And I said to myself, I'll never after this, I'm done. I'm gonna go to school, I'm gonna do something because I'm not doing this for the rest of my life. I watched my mom struggle cooking in, you know, restaurants and doing that. And I watched older waitresses still waitressing, picking up chairs at nine or ten o'clock to sweep under tables and just like in misery and telling
GenX Adulting Podcast (35:41)
Yeah. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (35:43)
me, Don't do this the rest of your life. So I did it.
GenX Adulting Podcast (35:46)
It's hard work
actually. You're on your feet all day. Yeah, then you gotta
Carmen Q Gollihar (35:47)
It is. All day.
GenX Adulting Podcast (35:49)
pick shit up at at the end of the shift. That's yeah. And also mentally and emotionally, you're in customer
Carmen Q Gollihar (35:51)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (35:55)
service. You're dealing with people, you're serving them, and not everyone is friendly and nice. And
Carmen Q Gollihar (35:59)
No.
GenX Adulting Podcast (36:00)
so you have to deal with that with a smile on your face. And that's exhausting too, on top of the physical labor on everything. Were most of the employees in their restaurant family?
Carmen Q Gollihar (36:11)
no. The the restaurant that I okay, one of the restaurants, yes. I worked at a family restaurant and they were the sweetest people. This was probably my sophomore and junior year.
No, my freshman and sophomore years. They were the sweetest family. And actually their daughter is married to my cousin who is like a a little bit older than me. So I went to school with their sons. and they would the oldest son would work there, like I guess when he'd get back on from the summer for college or whatever. So they had their family there. So I th that was a great place to work. and then the last place I work, it was this little old man and
Who moved there but they didn't have family, but they were so sweet because they didn't have family, so they would treat us like family and
GenX Adulting Podcast (37:01)
Mm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (37:01)
just like it it was it was always nice.
GenX Adulting Podcast (37:04)
And what about for your parents' restaurant? Was it mainly family members that worked there?
Carmen Q Gollihar (37:09)
So there was family members, like I I've done like some skits about it and I my cousin Crystal, so I used to look up to this girl, she was so beautiful. She's like, I used to be a waitress there, do you remember? I Yeah, I know. All the high school, like the
GenX Adulting Podcast (37:21)
Really?
Carmen Q Gollihar (37:22)
pretty high school girls like would come and ask for a job and I would be, you know, I was young and I would be like, my god. I I always thought it was so cool that these high school girls were working there and they were like friends with me and stuff like that. I was like, I'm so cool.
GenX Adulting Podcast (37:36)
Yeah. Did
you guys have
Carmen Q Gollihar (37:38)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (37:40)
like back then most restaurants had cigarette machines? Did you guys have that in your restaurant? And do you did you
Carmen Q Gollihar (37:44)
Yeah, we had that.
GenX Adulting Podcast (37:45)
do you remember walking over and like putting money in and getting cigarettes for people?
Carmen Q Gollihar (37:49)
yeah,
like customers, because everybody knew our family, right? And so customers would be like, Hey, can you baby Carmen, can you go get me? I'm gonna give you this, go get me a pack of this. And then they would like give me a little tip, you know? So I was always like hustling back in the day.
GenX Adulting Podcast (38:06)
I watched that. Okay, so as
you got into high school, that's when you said you played tennis, right?
Carmen Q Gollihar (38:11)
Yeah, I only played for I only did tennis, gosh, for a s two seasons, I think. But I did volleyball, basketball, and yeah, and then I threw in I I did some golf. I don't know what I just like I did I did
GenX Adulting Podcast (38:24)
You did everything.
So that so you through all of high school you were playing sports basically?
Carmen Q Gollihar (38:32)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (38:32)
Did you do any other activities or was it mainly sports focused?
Carmen Q Gollihar (38:36)
I did later on I tried out and dabbled in drama for one year. I always wanted to do drama. Always wanted to do it. but when my sports schedule, it was it was always busy. But then I was like really
GenX Adulting Podcast (38:51)
Mm-hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (38:51)
shy and I didn't I was shy to like act until I r to get up on stage. And
GenX Adulting Podcast (38:58)
Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (38:58)
then one year, I guess it was my s it was my senior year, my best friend, so my best friend Angela
Who I have a character in my skits, and she and I are still best friends. She was like, you and I are joining drama. I was like, what? She goes, Yeah. She would talk me into some crazy stuff. I was looking
GenX Adulting Podcast (39:17)
Mm-hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (39:18)
through my yearbook and I was like, I was a reporter for Spanish Club. Like, and I'm like, I I texted her, she goes, Yeah, I made you do it. Do you remember? Cause I was like, God. She was trying to get me to beef up my
Resume for college so we could go together and stuff like that. Because I was like, I'm not doing none of that. So she got me to join drama club and we were in one act play for one year and stuff like that. So that was it that was fun.
GenX Adulting Podcast (39:43)
Do you remember which play?
Carmen Q Gollihar (39:45)
it was called In the Middle of Grand Central Station, and it was about this young girl who
ran away and she runs on in into all these people in in Grand Central Station and I played
GenX Adulting Podcast (39:58)
Mm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (39:59)
a a character called Professor Searson who became a drunk and homeless
GenX Adulting Podcast (40:04)
Mm-hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (40:05)
and
What was funny is I had my costume and I had to put a pillow in my because my my my drama teacher was like, we need you to look kind of big. And I said, okay, well, I'll put a pillow. And I look at like the pictures now and I'm like, my god, I still like I had to wear a pillow. Like now I could like rock that character. I had
GenX Adulting Podcast (40:29)
Ha ha ha.
Carmen Q Gollihar (40:30)
to wear a pillow back then to look like that.
GenX Adulting Podcast (40:34)
The days when we
had to put a pillow in to give ourselves some weight. I love it.
Carmen Q Gollihar (40:36)
Ha ha ha
GenX Adulting Podcast (40:39)
So what how would you say your high school experience was? Like were you really social? Like if you look at the movie The Breakfast Club, how would you fit like as far as your high school experience?
Carmen Q Gollihar (40:51)
I don't think in the Breakfast Club I would have even had a character because I've thought about that, right? Because I hung out with I I was an athlete, right? But I also hung out with the Stoners and I hung out with the cow, you know, the kickers, which were the cowboys and cowgirls, and I hung out I hung out with everybody. I had
GenX Adulting Podcast (41:12)
Mm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (41:13)
my main group, right? But I would I was friends with everybody and I don't know, I just
Sometimes you wanted to hang out with the stoners and you wanted to get stoned. Like
GenX Adulting Podcast (41:22)
Yeah. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (41:23)
they're they're a fun group. There was no
GenX Adulting Podcast (41:25)
Yes, yes. So it
sounds like you floated. We call that floating. Like with my kids, I'll be like, It's good to be a floater because then you you get to know
Carmen Q Gollihar (41:32)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (41:32)
everyone. Now, did you guys have a smoking section in your high school?
Carmen Q Gollihar (41:36)
No, by that time I I started school in nineteen ninety. So that was already gone.
GenX Adulting Podcast (41:41)
Okay, yeah, that would have been gone by then. 'Cause we graduated eighty nine and we in my school we were the last ones. They shut it down after we graduated. Do you remember yours? Yeah, but no, they they had shut it down, but people would smoke out in the parking lot that was kinda yeah, away from the school a bit. We still had that
Carmen Q Gollihar (41:58)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (41:58)
section up until we were the last ones. So was your high school experience overall pretty positive?
Carmen Q Gollihar (42:05)
I l I had a great high school experience. I had a lot of fun. Of course I had, you know, there was ups and downs and stuff like that, but I I feel like my experience was great. And it the part about that is like my my kids will be like, I know you had fun in high school, but I hate high school. Like and 'cause I can't understand. I I I I try to make myself understand. I can't understand why.
their experience isn't but isn't the same until like I had to really focus. Okay, well they they don't have cousins here. They
GenX Adulting Podcast (42:38)
Mm-hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (42:40)
don't have our family's not here. their high school's bigger. Even though this is a small town, it's a bigger small town. It's it's one of those booming towns, right? That everybody's this is a Hallmark town. You go down our main streets, very beautiful, very hallmark type of vibes. so sometimes it's too perfect, right? And it's not as, you know
GenX Adulting Podcast (43:00)
Yeah. And social
media. They have social media which creates such FOMO. You know, like when we were growing up, if you spend the night at Sally's house, no one either knows about it or they don't find out till Monday. Now every you know, your other friends know Sally didn't invite them and it's in real time.
Carmen Q Gollihar (43:16)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (43:17)
It's all that crap. And then just the comparison of life and all that. I I feel bad for them in that respect. That
Carmen Q Gollihar (43:24)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (43:24)
they're too expo there's too much information about everybody at once.
Carmen Q Gollihar (43:29)
Yeah,
and you know, they're getting recorded, not even knowing they're getting recorded at at certain times and you know, it's just nothing's private, nothing's personal, nothing's everything's out there. So you always have to watch what you're doing at all times.
GenX Adulting Podcast (43:42)
Yeah.
I think the future generations are going to go more analog. I think they're gonna start It's already happening. It's happening. I think they're like,
Carmen Q Gollihar (43:49)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (43:49)
did you see that Gen Z's into CDs now? They're like buying CDs. What's
Carmen Q Gollihar (43:54)
Yeah. yeah. CDs,
they started with vinyl. The thing with my biggest one of my biggest and my analytics, my following is Gen Z. So I
GenX Adulting Podcast (44:08)
Interesting.
Carmen Q Gollihar (44:09)
I have a huge Gen Z following, which is one of the reasons and I wouldn't anyway, but I w you won't catch me doing any type of content that makes fun of Gen Z ever.
GenX Adulting Podcast (44:19)
Yeah, yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (44:21)
Plus my kids are Gen Z, so like why am I gonna make fun of them? That's my kids. But
GenX Adulting Podcast (44:22)
Yeah. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (44:24)
that's my my big so when I do like I do lots of videos about phones, about
GenX Adulting Podcast (44:31)
Mm-hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (44:32)
you know, any type of technology that I have. They're so interested and so the comments are like, I wish I got to live that type of life. I wish we could go back to that. I'm tired of
GenX Adulting Podcast (44:43)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (44:43)
this kind of, you know, everything right in their fingertips.
GenX Adulting Podcast (44:47)
Yeah. Well
y yeah it's a quick sidebar on that. So I have a a camera, an old Canon G nine camera. Probably was five hundred bucks fifteen years ago. It's now and what's happening even in photography, these old digital cameras are very popular. And I was looking at it on I think it was eBay.
It's like three hundred bucks. Three hundred well wait three hundred. Well wait, it was it was five fifteen years ago. Five hundred. Yeah. Now it's less? No, it's it's less because it's it's naturally less, but it should be f fifty bucks. It should be thirty dollars. so you're saying it should have depreciated to the point where it should be no we should want the thing. But it's still holding Yeah. Watch it sell for
Carmen Q Gollihar (45:31)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (45:31)
six hundred.
I think that they want all of that stuff. It's com they do. They want that nostalgic point and click type of camera. And
Carmen Q Gollihar (45:39)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (45:39)
that feeling. They they want they always talk about the nineties aesthetic and they think they want the wholesomeness and the the quietness of it in your brain, right? Our life.
Carmen Q Gollihar (45:49)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (45:50)
Our brains weren't so overstimulated because there wasn't so much information. I think they're craving that.
Carmen Q Gollihar (45:57)
they definitely they they they crave that. they I love that the thing like when they you said the word wholesome and they think everything was wholesome, I'm like, not really. Like we were we we weren't wholesome at all. You know, just nobody knew about
GenX Adulting Podcast (46:06)
Yeah. No. Yes.
Carmen Q Gollihar (46:11)
it, you know? Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (46:11)
Yes, yes, yes. No, it's very romanticized because there's there
it definitely yeah, but I think there's something about it, and I'll tell you when I see them put up stuff about that, I love to see it. I love it. Well our kids are Gen Z too. I love Gen Z. I love Gen Z girls especially and Gen Z women. I think they rock. I
Carmen Q Gollihar (46:30)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (46:30)
love them. I think they're gonna
totally change the the narrative on so many things when it comes to relationships, marriage, parenting, all of it. There already are dating,
Carmen Q Gollihar (46:38)
for sure. They're they're
GenX Adulting Podcast (46:40)
all of it.
Carmen Q Gollihar (46:41)
they're changing the so I was a teacher for twenty two years and they're changing the teaching field in the the in that when I was
starting out, you know, it was like, You're gonna come to work early, you're gonna come to stay at work late, you're gonna do this, you're gonna do that, 'cause it's all for the kids. And they're like, hell no. We're not doing that. You need to pay me which is true. You you know, y you
GenX Adulting Podcast (47:04)
Yeah. Yes. Yeah, yeah. Yes.
Carmen Q Gollihar (47:09)
get paid this salary, but you work day and night. And that's no. Like if it's for the kids, you're gonna pay me more like
GenX Adulting Podcast (47:13)
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I always say Gen
X raised Gen Z and we gave them a voice and we're watching them use it and nothing makes me prouder. And I know it annoys
Carmen Q Gollihar (47:25)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (47:25)
some people and I'm like, I don't I don't know. It takes getting used to though in a professional environment. They it does come in at a certain time and they want to leave at a certain time and they don't necessarily want to get phone calls after work. And I'm like, this is great.
I'm hopping on your vibe because we weren't right. Yeah, no, no, not at
Carmen Q Gollihar (47:40)
Yeah. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (47:42)
all. Not at all. I we'll show up early, we'll work late, and we'll take calls after hours. And they're like, No, it's that doesn't make sense. I think the it doesn't
Carmen Q Gollihar (47:49)
It it doesn't. It's like
GenX Adulting Podcast (47:51)
Yeah. The millennials started that work life balance, but Gen Z is absolutely running with it, there's no question. So as
you
Carmen Q Gollihar (47:57)
yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (47:58)
as you got into your senior year, was anyone talking to about you about college to you? Was that a normal conversation in your home? Did your siblings go to college?
Carmen Q Gollihar (48:09)
None of my siblings went to college. My parents didn't graduate high school. my sister didn't graduate high school. My two brothers did. And my mom wanted me to go to college.
And but we just never really talked about it. I would talk about it with my cousins, Johnny and Jesse, who were the ones that one of the two of the older ones that I hung out with who were going to college. we didn't I didn't have the support system of any type of help. I had my best friend Angela who was like, you're you're gonna come with me to college. Like, we're gonna go. But then my senior year, I started dating this guy, and then
We got married after high school.
GenX Adulting Podcast (48:52)
Mm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (48:53)
I was maybe I was a year after high school. And when I was I was gonna go to it was probably in February or January, I was gonna go to the Air Force. And I went through the whole process, you know, I did the whole, you know, I took the test, I was already placed and this and that and it was time for me to d I guess we had a
There was like one little thing that I had to do that was left and my dad was like, I don't want you to go. I don't want you to leave the family, this and that, you know. So I was like, Fine, I'll stay. But then I s I didn't want to go to college at that point. And I was kind of lost.
at that point. I don't know what I wanted to do with my life. And I was dating this boy and I was and we're he was like, let's like let's move in together after high school. I was like, okay. So we moved in together and we dated and decided to get married because like his parents were like, Well y'all are living together, y'all should get married. You know, you shouldn't be living in sin. And I c
GenX Adulting Podcast (49:56)
Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (49:57)
my parents were kind of like in the same boat, like not really pushing me to get married, but like my dad was like, I I think you should just like
go go go away like go go with Angela like y'all go to col like like don't get
GenX Adulting Podcast (50:06)
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (50:08)
like but then I was I was such a hard headed little shit
His like family, like a c he was he came from a big family too, right? Which was very intimidating and there was just like, you know, he had sisters and sisters in law and I like, no, I'm gonna you know, no, y'all you don't tell me. We're gonna get married. You know, like you the more you told me, I
GenX Adulting Podcast (50:30)
Yeah. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (50:32)
was gonna do the opposite because I was an idiot, you know? And so we got married and then my best friend was like, You still need to come to college. Please like come to college with me. And so
The first year I was like, Well, let me try community college. So I did that for a year and I was I hate that. She goes, Come to Incarnate Word. So I was like, fine. I filled out the paperwork and I went to Incarnate Word. Like it she it was that girl can talk me into anything. We're 50 years old now and she still talks me into stuff. Like it's just it's crazy. She did. Yeah. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (51:05)
She had your back. Like that that's a ride or die. That's a ride or die for sure. Now, where
was where was the school? What was the school?
Carmen Q Gollihar (51:15)
So when we started it was called Incarnate Word College. It's a private Catholic school and then it turned into University of the Incarnate Word, which it's in the in San Antonio like
Central San Antonio. And so
GenX Adulting Podcast (51:26)
Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (51:27)
I was like, I'm gonna, I'll go, you know. So I I went and then it just became this whole like I loved it. And I was like, man, Angela, I think I messed up. Like I got married. Like you're you're living on campus, you're dating all these people, you're having fun,
GenX Adulting Podcast (51:46)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (51:46)
and I'm over here married, which I was fine, like dating, I wouldn't it
But I wanted that college experience.
GenX Adulting Podcast (51:51)
Well Of course.
Well did he so I assume he went with you and you would you guys get an apartment?
Carmen Q Gollihar (51:57)
W I was commuting from Floresville to San Antonio,
which was about thirty so nowadays it's like forty
GenX Adulting Podcast (52:02)
Okay. Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (52:03)
five minutes, but when I the way I used to drive it was like twenty minutes, you know, like I was So
GenX Adulting Podcast (52:06)
Yeah. Okay, so
so you did like a year at community college and then you go to college. And so d did you finish out college married?
Carmen Q Gollihar (52:19)
No. so my last year of college, he was working at a different job. He he tried college and he just wasn't education wasn't his forte like in that c aspect. He wanted to make money or do whatever. So his job was like, okay
We have another place in California that we're opening up. Why don't y'all go, you know, you go over there and like help start it up which was gonna be perfect for me because like I was in communication arts and I like, there's more opportunity in California anyway. So we went over there, we stayed the summer, part of the summer, and then I was like, I'm going I went I came back to San Antonio and I lived with Angela on campus. She's like, live with me on campus, you know, your last
GenX Adulting Podcast (53:03)
Right. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (53:05)
year, like let's do this.
You you know,
GenX Adulting Podcast (53:06)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (53:07)
so we did, and you know, you you're young and your thoughts are like what are you doing over there? Like you're what are like so he was very
GenX Adulting Podcast (53:17)
Yes.
Carmen Q Gollihar (53:17)
much about what I wasn't doing anything, I was like hanging out with my friends and stuff like that. And
GenX Adulting Podcast (53:21)
Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (53:22)
then it's it's funny because there was this one guy that he hated, and I was like, He I think it he's gay. He at that point it was ninety.
seven ninety-eight and he hadn't come out because you didn't really do that which
GenX Adulting Podcast (53:35)
Right. Yeah, yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (53:37)
we're still friends today and he's gay like and so
GenX Adulting Podcast (53:39)
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (53:42)
and so the you know just things happened we were like I I think I got to the point where I was like I don't wanna do this I don't want to have like kids right now I don't wanna like whatever so we kinda like went our separate ways it was
I g we kinda left on bad terms. but
GenX Adulting Podcast (54:00)
Mm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (54:00)
not too long ago, like we kind of like after twenty-something years did speak. Cause I was to the point too where like I was like, shoot, like I need to like heal and and
GenX Adulting Podcast (54:13)
Closure.
Carmen Q Gollihar (54:14)
yeah. So we did, and then I was like, hey, hey, remember, Phil's gay. That whole time you thought he's like, I know, I know, I know now.
GenX Adulting Podcast (54:23)
Has he remarried
and has a family and everything?
Carmen Q Gollihar (54:27)
yeah, he did remarry. Well, he cheated with the woman that he married at that time because he thought I was cheating or whatever, and then they got divorced. Yeah, they got divorced. So
GenX Adulting Podcast (54:36)
no, no.
Carmen Q Gollihar (54:40)
it's funny because when we did when we did talk, I was like, how'd that work out for you? So it it it's to me it's funny, right? Because I
GenX Adulting Podcast (54:48)
Right. Yes.
Carmen Q Gollihar (54:49)
I in my like logic, I think like things happen, I always think.
something hap this happens for a reason, right? And you just never know in that moment why it's happening and you realize later on, like it was for the best, like that that
GenX Adulting Podcast (55:05)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (55:06)
happened. Cause like within that time frame that that was all happening, you know, we went through a thing. I found out that he had cheated. I was like, well that's it. I'm like, I'm not gonna like cr like I'm
I'm not gonna try to make something work. I met my husband like two weeks later after I found out. So it was
GenX Adulting Podcast (55:23)
No way, no way.
Carmen Q Gollihar (55:25)
it was hilarious. Like we were it was Halloween
and our friends we didn't have sororities on this or or fraternities on campus at that time. at that particular campus, because they were like they're I don't know what was going on with their charters or whatever. And so
we had this group of boys who just like made their own type of thing.
GenX Adulting Podcast (55:46)
Mm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (55:47)
so they would host parties, they would do all these things. And so they hosted a a charter bus to Austin.
where they have like for Halloween, it's this big thing in Austin, and they'd walk down Sixth Street and whole all that. So I was on the bus. I wasn't gonna go. And Angela's like, You have to come, you have to come because
GenX Adulting Podcast (56:05)
huh.
Carmen Q Gollihar (56:06)
I was gonna go with my other roommate and do what they were gonna do. And so I did, I went with them and me and Phil sat together and we were just having
like the time of our life and we see my my husband is on the bus and I was like I that was the only kid that we didn't know who it was. We're like, who's this? Like and so we didn't make it about 30 minutes out of the school at the campus and we had to stop because everybody had to go to the bathroom. There was brownies on the bus. There was all sorts of drinks on the bus. Like the bus was out of control that poor bus driver. So we pull over, he
at a rest stop and everybody gets out to go to the bathroom. Well I'm the first one back on the bus because I was the first one off the bus. I went to the restroom and so I was doing this thing where I was like, you have to have a password to like get by, right? And so when he comes by, he's I was like, what's the password? He's like, move. Right? I was like, I have to find out who this is.
GenX Adulting Podcast (57:10)
And was that it
from there? Did you guys start Okay, okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (57:12)
Yeah, we started talking
well, we went to Austin and we like went from club to club to club. And when we got back on the bus, my friend Phil starts puking his brains out.
GenX Adulting Podcast (57:28)
no.
Carmen Q Gollihar (57:28)
And so
here they have this bag. I was like, hell no, I'm not sitting with you. And he's like, You had to help me. I was like, I'm not helping you, like you're throwing up.
GenX Adulting Podcast (57:35)
Ha
Carmen Q Gollihar (57:36)
So I walked to the back of the bus and Phil's yelling my name. And I there's no seat. The only seat
left is next to Billy, right? And we had been arguing the whole time. And so like he's all there's a seat right here. And so So I was like, so I sat down and we talked the whole time and then like we've been together ever since. It was just Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (57:58)
That's awesome. So how old were you guys?
Like what, twenty two, twenty one? Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (58:02)
I 22 and he
was 25. I was right about to I was graduating in December,
GenX Adulting Podcast (58:10)
Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (58:11)
and this was an Octo Halloween. He was friends with one of the guys who chartered the bus. And at the last minute, he was like, Hey, well, what are you doing for Halloween? He goes, We're doing this. He's like, Well, I'm gonna go. And he's Yeah, come on. So he got on the bus. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (58:26)
my gosh, talk about meant to be. Talk
about meant to be. That's amazing. So was
Carmen Q Gollihar (58:32)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (58:33)
he from San Antonio?
Carmen Q Gollihar (58:35)
Yeah, he's from San Antonio and what's he's Anglo, right? He's and he went to an all Hispanic school. So it's funny
GenX Adulting Podcast (58:43)
Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (58:44)
cause like when we started dating, I was like, Hey, what are your parents gonna say? Because growing up where I grew up
the parents even back then in the nineties were like, No, no, you're not doing that. Like you you can't date her, she's Mexican. Well, she's light skinned. Well, it doesn't matter. She's Mexic like she's Hispanic. That's not gonna happen. So I always dated Hispanic guys and maybe I dated like one or two white guys every s you know, just like but we could never say anything. and yeah
GenX Adulting Podcast (59:15)
It's so interesting. It's wild, right? Yeah, it's crazy.
It's crazy to think like is it still like that? I don't want to interrupt you, but I'm curious.
Carmen Q Gollihar (59:22)
no,
you know, it's not as bad. I ca I don't know if there's still you know, my best friend who lives there, she says there's still like racism, but people are dating who
GenX Adulting Podcast (59:29)
There's some lines.
Carmen Q Gollihar (59:31)
who still don't k they everybody's date you know, it doesn't matter anymore. What what's funny is although
GenX Adulting Podcast (59:34)
Yeah. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (59:36)
a lot of those parents who had the issues, their kids married, you know, Hispanics or they married somebody who was black or they married so so it's it was just like the best thing is like y'all hated it so much Yeah. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (59:46)
Almost pushed them into it. Yeah, that's awesome. That's I think the
younger generations don't care. That's wild. Yeah, they're they date whoever they want. Love is love, all that. So I think they're
Carmen Q Gollihar (59:52)
They could care less. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (59:55)
they're just through
Carmen Q Gollihar (59:58)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:00:00)
dating. If you're Irish, you can't date someone who's Italian. Yeah, that was still going on. That was still going on. That's kinda. Yeah,
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:00:07)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:00:08)
it's just thankfully all that. So then, did he have to so because he went to school with
All he it's funny, we're in South Florida and everyone says Spanish here. But I know I'm I'm
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:00:19)
okay.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:00:19)
from Oregon and on the West Coast it's Hispanic and so I guess in Texas it's Hispanic too. But because
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:00:22)
Yeah. Yeah, and then some places it's Latinos.
Some places
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:00:26)
Right. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And it's not it's not white people who decided Spanish here. The Spanish people want to be called Spanish. And it's like it's very you know, you have to make sure it's confusing. Yeah, you have to you want to make sure that you wanna be respectful. and almost everyone here is Spanish. Like it's weird to be, you know, especially in where we are, we're just thirty-five minutes outside of Miami. So it's like all our kids, so many of their friends are Spanish, it's just like that's just how it is. But because your husband went to school with
So many Hispanics. Did did he know Spanish or did he like fit right into the culture no problem with your family?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:01:04)
With my family he fit right in. like
He has his regular tone of voice when he speaks, which is very like when we speak we're we're like super loud and we're like like yelling and scre
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:01:17)
Hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:01:17)
it's just like it's so he's that's his his normal see. When he's at work he's like tones it down and he's like but then you know, so he
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:01:24)
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:01:25)
fit he fits right in with my family like right away. does he understand Spanish? He understands a lot of it. He doesn't speak it. but you know, so but he does under
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:01:36)
But if you're
but if your family's talking, he can pick up on different things. that's pretty good. That's pretty good.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:01:40)
Eighty percent of the stuff that they're saying. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:01:43)
You can't really talk shit about in front of Yeah. Yeah, yeah. So
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:01:46)
Yeah, yeah, he'll he'll he'll know he's like
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:01:50)
did he have to go ask your dad for permission to date you? Just like your grandfather had to do with your gr okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:01:56)
No.
No, he didn't have to. Yeah. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:01:58)
Okay, or your dad had to do with your mom, that's what it was. Okay, so that
that was that tradition he didn't have to do. So how long so you so wait, you graduate college, then did you stay w did you move to San Antonio because you guys were dating, or how did did you guys did you just keep g driving into San Antonio to see him, or how did you guys make that work?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:02:18)
So I was living on that last year I was I I ha was already living in San Antonio living on campus. And so when I graduated, I did not want to go back to Floresville at all because I was like, I'm a failure. I've I just got I'm getting divorced. I wasn't divorced yet. I'm getting divorced. You know, I felt like
like shame like I shamed myself. Like I was like, my god, I didn't make this work. So I was like, there's no way I'm going back then back there, which I could like kick myself because like who cares? Everybody gets divorced, you know what I'm saying?
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:02:45)
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:02:47)
But I I felt like ugh. So I moved in with one of my I used was a work study. So one of the ladies that I was a work study for, we were all close. Like she was she was so fun. She's we're still friends. so I lived with
her for a while until I got on my feet and then I got a job at a construction company which is like a huge could it was huge, like it was called it it's called HB Zachary. I don't know what it's called now, but they do roads and this and that. And my cousin, my first cousin who was like 30 years older than me, was one of the vice presidents and he's like, come get a job over here, just you know, I'll get you a job. So I did that and I got an apartment and then
I don't know, Billy just like was always there and just eventually just moved in. And so then
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:03:38)
Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:03:39)
we got married. not too long at like a couple of years later.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:03:44)
Okay, so you
stayed in San Antonio, started working in San Antonio, and then you guys moved in together. How long from the time when you guys met on that party bus or whatever the charter to when you got married? How many years between? T okay, so that moved pretty quickly. And you were still
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:03:59)
Two years. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:04:02)
young. Like so we got married at twenty three. Did so did you get married at what, twenty four?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:04:07)
Yeah, nineteen and twenty-four. yeah, and we stay married.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:04:09)
You've been married for while. Okay. Okay. Yeah, that's true. I forgot about yeah, the nineteen. But have you thought about you said
you guys were fighting that day? It sounds like you were flirting. And it right? He's only saying that because that's how we were. Yeah. Sometimes
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:04:18)
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We're still like that today. We're like always like
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:04:26)
our youngest will be like, stop fighting. We're like, we're not fighting. It's just mom flirting. And then he'll be like, We're flirting. Then he's like, Ew, it's a whole thing. Then he goes away.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:04:30)
Yeah. That's our kids are like
that too. They're like gross. yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:04:35)
It's the friction. It's the friction that keeps it, you know, alive or whatever. So
we've been married next week, this week coming up, thirty-two years or something like that. Some crazy. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:04:43)
nice.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:04:44)
So but I think you need a little bit of that friction. You know, if it's too
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:04:48)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:04:48)
too flowing too easy, then it's like it can get a little boring. So I think that's always a good sign. Yeah, no.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:04:53)
I don't know how people never fight. I'm like, how?
That's crazy.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:04:57)
No, I I I
I would get the ick. I I need I need a little edginess. So yeah, I think we were actually like going back at this morning we were had a little thing. So I was like, good, we're ready for recording today. We'll have a little bit of juice. So okay, so you guys, how long well wait, what did he do in San Antonio?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:05:15)
he was an electrician at the time. Yeah. Well he was in the mil he had just gotten out of or was getting out of the military. He was a Marine and then he was an elect
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:05:23)
Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:05:23)
became an electrician. and he did that for a while. And he was just a hot mess. Like he just a troublemaker, like just doing like
Just whatever. Like and I was like, no, you gotta like get your life together. Like you have to go to college. He's like, all right. And so it's just like he became a teacher. You know, he he he went to incarnate word. We we we bought a house in two thousand one. Yeah, not too long. And we I I'm just like, how did we do this? Like we
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:05:56)
Yeah. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:05:57)
bought a house and
And he went to school, got his degree, then he got his masters and I got my masters and then we just like just built this life. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:06:05)
Yeah, you could back then. Yeah, you could do that. Well time flies too. But also it's just
I think it was just easier to there were starter homes and at starter prices and Was he was he in the Gulf War then?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:06:18)
He he never he went he joined after, I think after it
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:06:23)
Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:06:24)
it or right when it was like ending. So yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:06:27)
'Cause
I was thinking when you w you said you were looking at the Air Force, that would have been like right in that time zone. You might have been deployed, I would think, or maybe right
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:06:35)
yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:06:35)
after. Maybe or maybe it would have been after
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:06:37)
Think it was at ninety four.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:06:39)
'cause she was I'm trying I'm trying to piece that together.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:06:40)
What's ninety four? 'Cause it what,
the Gulf War started in ninety one? Ninety, ninety one?
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:06:44)
Yeah, it was when we were in college. Yeah. So it would have been maybe towards the tail end of that, I don't know. But yeah, y that maybe would have happened. so you okay, you guys get the house. You said you got your masters. Were you working at the construction company when you did that?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:06:57)
So
I was working at the construction company and I didn't like that at all. Like it was like it was just like everybody who was like a a VP or this or that was a man and like the women who were trying to climb their way to the top were
Just mean as hell. Trying to I mean, I I get it now why th why they were 'cause they were trying to, you know, these men were just ho ruthless. Like they were just, you know. I remember
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:07:24)
Yeah. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:07:27)
them talking about like my boss who was a woman. She wasn't a vice president, but she was one of the directors. But they just like would talk
smack about this poor lady. She was the nicest lady too. And then I I remember they gave me a like a mentor and she was like just
she was hard like she and she was like you have to be tough here like they
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:07:48)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:07:49)
you you have to so she so like the one of the vice presidents was like okay we're gonna have you go back and forth to the Houston offices and we're gonna put you with this lady and so she was real tough too like it was just crazy and I was like I hated
I didn't like Houston. It was very industrial where where
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:08:09)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:08:09)
they worked. It was just it was just ugly. I was like, I I can't do this. Like this is like I'm gonna live here and this is w
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:08:17)
Mm-hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:08:17)
no. So like I I one day like I would go to I would go to work really early and
I like, you know what? I wanna I wanna teach. Like I had always wanted to teach and I didn't have my degree. So the in you know, I got on the internet, right? When the internet was first like it was still a little internet y.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:08:34)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:08:36)
So I was like, I'm Catholic. Let me try Catholic schools. You didn't have to have a you just had to have a degree, didn't have to be in education. And one morning I just sent off like tons of resumes from the fax machine at work. And
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:08:47)
The fax machine. I love it.
I love it. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:08:51)
And I got a call from this one school called St. John Bosco. and they became the Spurs nuns last year. I don't know if
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:08:59)
wow.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:09:00)
yeah. So cause they were they're always going to the games. They love their Spurs. Yeah. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:09:02)
Yes, I've seen them on social media. Yeah, on TikTok.
Yes, yes. That's awesome. So is that where you taught?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:09:08)
So
I taught there for five years. one of the sisters who came in like two years after I was there, she became the principal. And I just loved this lady so much. And she
was like, Hey Carmen, I really don't want to tell you this, but I'm still gonna tell you.
There's a way that you can get your master's degree to get your teeth teaching certification. I didn't want to tell you because I know you're gonna leave us, but if you could promise me that you'll stay maybe you know, a little bit after you get it. And so I say, Yeah, I promise, sister. So I stayed a couple of years after I got it. And she I just the the pay, I I wanna say I started making twenty thousand dollars a year in nineteen in two thousand.
And then like I left in two thousand five at twenty six thousand to where like teaching pay was forty five thousand at the time at at public schools. So she's
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:10:02)
Right, right, right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:10:04)
like, I understand you wanna start a family and everything. and so they paid for that for me. so in San Antonio and my
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:10:11)
That's awesome. That's a nice thing to do. Was that in San Antonio? Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:10:16)
two oldest girls,
went to their pre-K program because I adopted all my kiddos. we could we we
ended up we couldn't have kids. So as I adopted one, it was actually from my niece who just just her li could her life wasn't together. so as she would have the kids, we decided we would adopt them. And so the the sisters were like, we'll bring them to us. And so we didn't have to pay for their first years of education.
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:10:49)
wow. So are so
how many of your children are from your niece? All five of them. And so how old were they when they came to you?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:11:02)
my oldest was f two and then the second child, when she was three. We got her a little later. And then everybody else has babies. So my yeah. So she she
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:11:15)
Okay. Okay. So the and and the
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:11:18)
had and they we we we take
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:11:21)
So so this is your knee so this is your sister's children?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:11:26)
my sister's would be my sister's grandchildren.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:11:30)
Okay, so okay. So so are you like it. That's
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:11:35)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:11:36)
incredible. I'm yeah you're like a saint on earth. Well and
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:11:40)
I I and
we always say that it was them who like saved us 'cause like we really,
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:11:44)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:11:45)
you know
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:11:46)
Well how it's true, I guess there's yeah, yeah. Because how long were you on an infertility journey?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:11:54)
you know, for years we didn't want to have kids, and then I guess when I was thirty we decided, okay, we need to like get with this. Like so when I was I I had tons of issues. I had endometriosis. when I was twenty five, it was so weird. I always thought for some reason when I was a kid that when I turned twenty five I was gonna die. I don't know what it was.
But one day it was it was in the summer after my first year teaching and I got these bad what I thought were period cramps because I used to get them horribly like
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:12:31)
Mm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:12:31)
it was just it was bad. And I was supposed to go pick out a dress for one of my friends for her wedding and I said I couldn't go because of, you know, I was having cramps. Well come to find out, like I I I
I c I couldn't even stand it at any point. So I went to the emergency room. It was too packed. So I left. And then I ended up going to like some urgent care. He's like, go back. Your appendix is rush ruptured. You have to go back.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:12:58)
my goodness.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:13:00)
He and so they did the whole thing. My appendix had ruptured for that whole like day before.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:13:04)
my goodness. Wow.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:13:07)
They did surgery. I was in ICU. I was there for a month. And it
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:13:13)
my gosh.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:13:14)
Yeah. So it was double s I had two surgeries and so that was that and when I that was when I was twenty five and I told my husband I was like if I don't wanna have kids, like I don't wanna have kids 'cause this is scary. What if you know, like that's crazy.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:13:28)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:13:29)
if I have this type of pain. Like I didn't reali realize that the pain that I was having was an extreme amount of pain that, you know,
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:13:36)
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:13:38)
so we waited.
And then at 30, I I just had so much stuff that was a had already happened with that, with the endometriosis. And it just we tried fertility and I was doing those, gosh, whatever the pills were called that were supposed to like do whatever make you ovulate. They were just killing me. And I was
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:13:59)
Right. Mm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:14:01)
I felt like my whole body was like gonna explode. and I turned into this like I felt like this
beast of a person. Like I was just so it it made me feel horrible. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:14:10)
The hormones. The hormones.
Yeah. Yeah. No, it's what women go through.
I I I'm always in awe because you are you're ta ingesting in one way or another, whether it's shots or pills, hormones and and stuff to help your body get pregnant. But what you go through with all with adjusting your hormones, that's a big deal. That's not talked about enough.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:14:37)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:14:37)
Is what women go through on that infertility journey, what they have to go through physically, not just mentally and emotionally. That's like a separate thing. But physically
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:14:45)
yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:14:46)
there
They're altering their chemical makeup. And I don't know if there's even enough discussion when you meet with doctors about that aspect of it, of what to expect as a woman and what could what you could feel like. And so
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:14:59)
Yeah. Yeah. No and there wasn't, you know,
a and this was just like step one of the whole thing.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:15:06)
Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:15:07)
You know, they do this whole process
Yeah, for you guys it's embarrassing because you have to like, you know, do what you do into a cup so they could test your sperm. But
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:15:13)
Right. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:15:15)
like the process for us is they insert this tube inside you to blow out your ovaries, the the whole the tubes to make sure nothing's stuck. The pain that
You feel it feels like your stomach is on fire and you cramp so bad. I I I would never ever do that again.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:15:45)
I can't imagine. I and that's not talked about enough. That needs to be talked
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:15:48)
It's not
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:15:49)
about more because that is just another miraculous thing women do. That's just insane.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:15:55)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:15:55)
So they fill you with air so they make sure it's all kind of flowing in a sense. Yeah, that's crazy.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:15:59)
Yeah. So that's
th the first step. They're like, something could be lodged. Usually for women, you do it, everything's good and you can, you know, have children. Didn't
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:16:09)
Right, right, right, right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:16:11)
work. Second step is pills. during that time, like my behavior ch because of the hormones, right? You change. I I lost friendships 'cause I just you just
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:16:20)
Right. Yeah. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:16:24)
become this
I say like you become this beast that you can't control. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:16:30)
Yeah.
Like a whole other person. You can't because
like did you you said you had endometriosis. So did you have really bad PMS or PMD? What they now know is PMD D. They didn't even talk about what is PMD. That's like a almost like
a pre menstrual i i it's it's like you go into almost a serious clinical
depression with your PMD. But you know what I'm talking about, where now they found that I know now looking back, I had that. Because my PMS like put me in a spiraling depression.
Where I would even have
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:17:02)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:17:02)
like suicidal ideation. And then I at different times. And then I'd get my period and be like, I'm great. Everything's fine. And it was the freaking. Meanwhile, I'm over early. Yeah. But it's but it's Where's that cup? But it's
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:17:12)
Yeah. You're like Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:17:17)
but it's that that what you're talking about, you can't control it because that's hormonal, right? The PMS,
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:17:22)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:17:23)
the PM, D D.
But and I had horrendously heavy periods. So with your endometriosis, did were you super hormonal with your with PMS?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:17:33)
y yeah, like okay, so it it didn't matter, like for me, if I took birth control to try to control whatever I had, I
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:17:41)
Mm-hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:17:42)
the birth control did something to my body where it it physically hurt my body and my mind. I just remember at one point washing dishes and breaking a dish.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:17:54)
Mm-hmm. Yeah. Cause you were so tense type of thing?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:17:55)
So I was just so upset. I was just like for
for I didn't know why. Like I was like
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:18:02)
Yes.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:18:03)
just angry and just like broke it because it just I was so I I couldn't control my myself. And so I stopped
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:18:10)
It's like a rage.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:18:11)
that. Yeah, yeah. It's it's this rage that takes over you.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:18:14)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:18:15)
And so I stopped that and then which made the pain like I I just I hated hearing
Especially growing up like from coaches, like I'd like, I'm on my period, you're fine, just run. You know, it'll go away to went to where I my appendix ruptured and I thought it was my period pain.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:18:35)
Right. Right. And that's a ma
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:18:37)
That's how bad it was.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:18:38)
that's amazing that you went a full day since your after your appendix appendix ruptured. 'Cause you went into sepsis, there's no question, right? 'Cause you were in the hospital for a month. I mean, you're that's amazing that you did survive that.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:18:51)
Yeah, they had to the second surgery basically so I had this slit from one side of my stomach to the other where they had to like go in and just clean every single thing out because it was just it was a it was a mess.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:19:03)
my goodness. my goodness.
Wow. Okay, so then you guys go on your infertility journey and then realize that that's it's not gonna happen. How soon after that realization did you start adopting your children?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:19:23)
I wanna say it maybe was a couple of years later that that all happened. we went to we went to a what was called a healing mass and through the Catholic Church. We went to downtown the beautiful
church in San Antonio and like there was a bunch of peop like I like I'd never kind of like believed in this t sort of thing before, right? People were up at the altar, the priest is blessing you. But when you we got up there, like you felt like this like energy. It was kinda it was kinda neat. But
I get emotional.
So he says, be prepared for the amount of children you're about to be blessed with. All right. So we're like, okay, we're gonna have, like, we're gonna get pregnant, it's gonna happen. But what we didn't realize is that it was gonna happen in a different way. So yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:20:22)
Mm. That's beautiful. That's amazing.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:20:26)
So in a way, like our healing, the healing for me is like
You're done. Like it's it's happening this
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:20:35)
Absolutely. How soon after that did that did your was your first adoption then?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:20:42)
so she had she had the kids, maybe I wanna say that was in
Loretta was born in 2008. That mass was probably like in 2007 or so.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:20:53)
Mm. Wow.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:20:56)
and so we, you know, we went through the we got her right away. We didn't adopt her right away, but we were she was in our hands because of the situation. My sister died that next so my sister passed away and then two months later she was born because and my niece was
pregnant at the time that that was happening. So then all with her first, yeah. And she
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:21:20)
With her first? Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:21:22)
was she was really young. She was doing her things that she was doing. And then we got her and then ended up adopting her just a little bit later. And then like here comes another one. And then we're like, okay, and then here comes another one. You know, it was just like she went to prison.
and then twins and right
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:21:47)
Why?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:21:47)
after that and we're like
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:21:49)
That makes sense that I was thinking five times, but twins
Yeah. Yeah. It's amazing though that you had that was quite a time for you because you and your husband go on. So it starts with the appendix, if you really think about it. Then you go on a fertility journey, like what, five years later or so. And that's a whole
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:22:06)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:22:06)
emotional, mental, physical journey on both of you, especially you. and then you go to this mass where you experience a miracle basically. I mean, the fact that he I mean, he knew, right? And God was sending that message to you. You received a message from God.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:22:22)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:22:22)
And which is just such a life-altering moment in general right there. And then you start receiving all these children. That is a time. And all of this
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:22:34)
Ha ha.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:22:35)
happens what, before you're like what, thirty-five, thirty-six?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:22:40)
so the last the twinsies came, I guess I was 39
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:22:45)
Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:22:46)
at the time. but before they should like after the middle the the third one, Quinn, that's where I went back to the doctor and I was just like, I can't take this anymore. Something's wrong with me. Like something's wrong. He's like,
They were gonna go in he's like you you need a hysterectomy, like 'cause you have he had done I I it's hard to even remember the time frame, but they had done god, what is that sir? A laparoscopy, I guess of what it is, to see what was going on. Something
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:23:14)
Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:23:16)
was covering, I guess something with my ovary. and he's like, We can't save any of it. Like I said, take it all out. I don't want any of it. Like I don't want anything to do with like that it just it isn't n
done nothing but cause me pain. So
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:23:32)
Right. Right. So did
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:23:33)
at thirty-eight we t we removed everything.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:23:36)
Even your ovaries?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:23:38)
Even the ovaries. So I went into surgical mes menopause. Well he first he gave me the patch, the the estrogen so I wouldn't go into menopause right away.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:23:48)
Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:23:49)
So that way my body could get used to it. And then he's like, Okay, after six months we'll take it off so that the endometrios 'cause they scrape your body to get the endometriosis
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:23:59)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:24:00)
out, but there was so much that was cut he said basically it was like tar. It had turned into tar and my ovaries were just like twisted. So there was no way he's
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:24:11)
Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:24:11)
like, That that's why you couldn't get pregnant, like now that I can see
Don't you wish there was something that they could just like see it before they have to go in, you know? But
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:24:18)
Yeah. Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah. So but
when they removed your uterus, did the endometriosis still keep growing? Was there a threat of that?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:24:29)
So he the it I I don't know how the endometriosis what he I I I kind of like blocked a lot of that, but there was still because the estrogen patch, that's what it was, because I had the estrogen patch on, I was still getting estrogen to feed the endometriosis to keep to keep growing. So then
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:24:47)
Okay. Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:24:50)
we did that for I guess three to six months, then got off of it and then stayed off.
off of it for so long so that the endometriosis could the rest of it could just die out that he couldn't scrape. And
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:25:02)
Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:25:03)
I always think of it as like that stranger things, like the endometriosis as as that underworld. That's what it looks like, feels like to me. yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:25:06)
Yes, yes, yes, yes, that's a perfect way to visualize it. That is a perfect way to visualize it.
So during that time while you're off you're now no hormones, so the endometriosis can die. Did you experience menopausal symptoms?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:25:26)
So I went into what was called like as soon as you take off that patch and you're done, you're now in surgical menopause with no estrogen
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:25:32)
Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:25:32)
at all on your body, right? So I went into surgical menopause. did I I I wanna say I got like a hot flash like one time and
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:25:43)
Wow.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:25:44)
that was it. And then it was just like I was so busy in my life at that time
I couldn't tell you if what I was experiencing was menopause or the fact that I had just found out, we're having twins. Tomorrow
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:26:01)
Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:26:02)
they're coming to the house. Tomorrow. You know, so it was like
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:26:03)
Right, right, right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:26:07)
I was I was a mess that whole yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:26:08)
You were grinding. You
were grinding. And and also during that time that we were talking about you lost your sister. I mean that th that's just it's just your thirties basically were just such
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:26:20)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:26:21)
a time. Did did she pass from an
illness?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:26:25)
my sister was addicted to prescription medicine. She got addicted to Xanax. Is that what the the she was addicted to that? Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:26:35)
Mm-hmm. Is it yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:26:39)
And then she was addicted to pain medication 'cause she also experienced a lot of pain
Her, she you know, she had a hysterectomy. I think she only had partial she was ha still having pain,
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:26:51)
Mm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:26:52)
with you know, she just she just had a a very addictive personality. So she just she we we we went head to head about quitting and she quit. She finally had gotten rid of it and then
was off it for months and then one day she decided to take it again. And so what they kind of explain is like when you have that sort of addiction and you get back on your heart is or has weakened and is not used to it again and taking the amount that you were used to taking, she just died and she went to sleep and didn't wake up. So
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:27:33)
Yeah. Yeah. I think that
that happens to addicts when they go clean. It's like a jolt. Yeah, and then not
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:27:40)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:27:40)
realizing you can't handle what you could before. I think that
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:27:44)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:27:44)
that's very common. how old was she?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:27:48)
she was forty-four at the time.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:27:49)
Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:27:50)
And I was thirty two thirty-one, thirty-two at the time. so which is why I have I have this thing about prescription drugs, which I
have a very hard time taking. I I I have to research something. And you know, with medication, there's always bad that comes with it. So
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:28:11)
Yes, yes.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:28:12)
I I try to do everything I can so that I don't have to take prescription drugs. My mom is diabetic. She's 79. She was on cholesterol medications, one of the statins,
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:28:27)
Mm-hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:28:27)
and it was during COVID and
she lost her ability to walk. Like it it completely
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:28:32)
wow.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:28:33)
she was in the hospital for three months, they ran all sorts of tests. Everything was fine. So there were like the statins, which it's it's have been known to do that, to people. Yeah. So
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:28:42)
Really? Mm-hmm. Did you know that?
I've so I had high cholesterol and the doctors wanted me to go on statins. I and I researched it and I was like, No, no way. No, there's so
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:28:54)
No.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:28:54)
many different side effects that
Wow that that's a side effect. I didn't know that, but I didn't
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:29:00)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:29:01)
get past the initial the five things. It's like, no, I'm not doing this. I'm gonna go running. I'm gonna go walk and I will never eat again. Yeah, and and yeah,
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:29:07)
Yeah. No. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:29:10)
you you changed your health, but that is a side that could be a potential side effect is losing your ability to walk.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:29:16)
Yeah, so it attacks your your your muscles and a being that she was already older, she had diabetes,
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:29:22)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:29:23)
she had this and that. So it just she had to go on dialysis for a while and
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:29:27)
my gosh.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:29:28)
It w it was crazy 'cause when that happened to her, one of my friends from high school messaged me and said, Hey, I heard your mom in the next bed 'cause her husband was in the hospital. So when we were talking, she goes, The same thing happened to him because of the statins, but he was forty when it happened, so he was able to start walking again in two years. Which my mom yeah
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:29:47)
my gosh. Wow.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:29:49)
which, you know, it's crazy. When all that happened
From that day I changed my eating. I wor started working out. I lost fifty pounds.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:29:58)
Mm-hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:29:59)
I was like, you know, I talked to my kids about our family history and
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:30:05)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:30:06)
why we eat the way that we do and why the working out is important
because we don't I just I don't wanna be on any medications, period. If I don't have to.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:30:14)
I'm with you. I'm the
s yeah. Well well, it's what's interesting, what you were describing earlier, it almost sounds like your body was telling you it was almost rejecting it, right? You were saying you were taking the different medications or hormones and your body was like, This isn't working. Yeah. So Extre
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:30:28)
Yeah. Yeah, for sure.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:30:31)
yeah. W did you ever go back on HRT or have you been able to raw dog it through life without it?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:30:36)
No. No,
I went back on it and I haven't been off of it. I've even done the pellets. I love the pellets. If I could do the pellets, I would do them.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:30:43)
I know, I know.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:30:44)
But insurance doesn't cover them. I
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:30:46)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:30:47)
love that you could put the testosterone in, but
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:30:49)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:30:50)
I'm getting the testosterone through a compound pharmacy that's a gel. I was doing
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:30:54)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:30:54)
tablets, but I have this like sore on my tongue from
But now I do the gel and I feel so much better with the testosterone. So much
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:31:04)
Yeah. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:31:06)
better.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:31:06)
I do the t mine's a cream, but my I was just at my appointment two days ago for my annual. She called it a gel, and I'm like, it's a cream. She goes, It's the same. Yeah, it's a cream. But
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:31:13)
It's a cream. Yeah, it's a cream.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:31:15)
she called a gel. So I do compound pharmacy and then I and then I do estradiol patch. I was doing progesterone.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:31:22)
Yeah, I do too.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:31:22)
I don't have a uterus
like you had a hysterectomy in 2020. I had fibroids and all that and the bleeding and everything to
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:31:27)
Mm-hmm.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:31:27)
the point where I got anemic and it was like I had my period like three weeks out of the month, that type of thing. But I was doing progesterone to help with sleep, but I found
it made me really bloated and constipated, which I found out are side effects. So I'm like, well I don't need it for my because I don't have a uterus. So now
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:31:43)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:31:44)
I do a really good magnesium that knocks you if you want one that knocks you out, I know of one. But
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:31:49)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:31:49)
I do the estradiol and the testosterone and I it's when we pack to go somewhere, I pack my thyroid medication and I pack my HRT before I even pack my underwear. I'm like I can't function. Why are you guys having to
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:32:01)
You were my twin.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:32:03)
I can't function, yeah. But why are you
guys having to go through a compound?
Why don't you go to C V S or Walgreens? no way. For men Well it's FDA approved enough to
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:32:09)
It's not a yeah, not for women. You know, it's funny, for men, yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:32:13)
go to the compound, but not No, no, I like insurance isn't covering it. No, that's yeah, but yeah,
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:32:19)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:32:20)
I got you. No, for men though, right? That's all Yeah. As it should be.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:32:22)
yeah, it's it's all it's fine. It's funny 'cause I'm on
the exact same medicines you are. I'm on the thyroid,
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:32:27)
Okay. Yep.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:32:30)
and then I do the estradiol. I d the testosterone. I don't do the progesterone because I I I stopped that a long time ago because I think of the same reasons.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:32:37)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:32:38)
And I do the magnesium gly glyconate. Is that what it's called?
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:32:41)
I found a better one.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:32:44)
Yes, it is. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:32:43)
I'll send you a picture of it. It's the only
magnesium that crosses the blood brain barrier. So it also helps with cognitive health and focus, but it knocks you out like progesterone does. It's it's makes it he I got him on it and the glyconate doesn't didn't work for me. I stopped it's like this one's the like the therinate. It's like magnesium theronate. and I
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:33:04)
okay.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:33:05)
I'll send it's pretty good. Yeah. I I'm actually gonna do a video on it eventually because it's so good. I give my son one at night and it helps him.
and it's just magnesium. It's just totally ma yeah, totally magnesium. But yeah, so are do you do synthoid and cytomel or the generic of those? Or do you only do a synthroid or what do you do for thyroid med?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:33:26)
I do it's called a N P thyroid.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:33:28)
Okay, so
you're doing the like a compound type of or natural it's different. It's not a synthetic. I think you do more it's a natural derivative. Pi the pig, the pigs. I did try that for like
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:33:36)
Is it it's a pig. Pi from pigs. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:33:42)
I did armor, which is like what you're taking. It wouldn't work for me.
I tried it. I wanted to do that one. I tried it for two years and it would not h I I was a mess. So I have to do synthroid. But yeah, for any women out there listening, make sure your thyroid health is get everything tested because
So many w I think it should be automatic for women from the age of eighteen yearly. I think thyroid should be a baseline test for women because so many
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:34:11)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:34:12)
women are suffering from thyroid disease or Hashimoto's disease and don't know and are getting band aided for the symptoms and it drives me crazy. How did you discover it? 'Cause I c I know her journey and it was like took a while. How did you get to the bottom of your thyroid being an issue?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:34:28)
So the gynecologist when I was living in San Antonio that I used to have was amazing. He it's crazy because one of my friends who I was a teacher with who became our assistant principal, that's her brother, and he was just the most amazing doctor and he was like, We're gonna test you for everything like thing and so we tested the thyroid and so then he got me to start taking that and he was like so patient with me with my fear of medicine because some doctors aren't patient with you.
when you don't want to take a medication, which I'm like, well then I don't want to be with I need somebody who's good. So I have another
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:35:02)
Yeah. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:35:04)
doctor here in town who he's very like about my whole thing with my medicine. Like so I'm glad, you know, y it's hard to find those that they just
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:35:14)
It is.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:35:14)
want to like
give you something, you know.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:35:16)
Yeah, no, finding a doctor that will listen to you and and I tell everyone, if they're not listening to you, find a new doctor. I drive almost an hour to go to my endocrinologist twice a year. I don't care. She
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:35:26)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:35:26)
she can move two hours away. I'll drive two hours. I don't 'cause you it's like so hard to find someone that will listen to you. Well, some doctors do. Like
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:35:33)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:35:33)
I didn't want to do the statin, so it was like we'll do the red rice husks or whole and yeast. Yeah. Yeast, yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:35:38)
The radio address, yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:35:40)
And if you research that, it's complete it's the Wild West. They're it's not regulated. You don't know what you're in.
So I didn't do that either. You just did a although I think now we're gonna get one of those. Have you heard of those calcium C T scans for your heart? And it's it checks for the plaque in your heart.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:35:59)
Mm-hmm.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:36:00)
and she had suggested to do that. But I've been seeing so much on social media about that. I mean, you can just go get it done, it's not expensive. And so I just was
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:36:07)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:36:08)
talking to my doctor last week about that. And especially if you have cholesterol, they suggest you. I don't know if I do anymore, but yeah, well, I still get it.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:36:15)
I did see that.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:36:16)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:36:16)
Yeah, I saw that. I'm gonna I'm
thinking they're gonna have one come to our town in a couple of months, so I'm gonna have me and my husband and I do that. But
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:36:25)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:36:25)
did you know for your breast exams now they have a little thing where you have to pay a little extra, but they can like check like parts of I don't know exactly what they check, but they check to see if like your heart has gosh, what is it called?
It has something to do with checking your heart to see if you have any, not it clogs, but if you would have any issues. It's like an Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:36:48)
Really?
Because when I get my breast exam, it's I do the traditional mammogram and ultrasound. I have to do the ultrasound too. But there's a place you can go. Is it the hearse scan? Have you heard of that hearse scan?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:37:01)
It's not the hearse.
I heard that. I heard that. And I was thinking about doing that. But this is gosh. Yeah, she's she's a mess.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:37:07)
look at the doggie. What's her name?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:37:10)
this is Winnie Muffins. She's one of my one of the ones we just rescued a few months ago.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:37:14)
my gosh, she's adorable. Looks tiny. She's so cute.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:37:18)
She's a mess. They they make fun of her here at the house because I just dote on her. They're like, Winnie Muffins. She's a sweet girl.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:37:23)
she is precious. She is so precious.
no, but I'm gonna look into what you're talking about. I'm gonna see if I can
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:37:30)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:37:31)
if they have something like that. So okay, so to go back to your teaching, what age did you teach?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:37:37)
so when I started teaching it was second grade and I taught third grade and then I went into middle school. I love middle school. Middle school kids Yeah, the
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:37:43)
Wow. Did you really
so many teachers complain about the kids. I say it takes a special person to be a middle s middle school teacher. Well she is a singer. And you are, I know. I'm not surprised.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:37:49)
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:37:55)
I'm not surprised because you either love or you can't handle it.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:37:59)
Yeah. It it just their energy is hilarious. And you know, if you just think about like they're going through this change that they have no idea. Like it's just you know,
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:38:08)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:38:09)
i i it it they're they're really a fun bunch.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:38:13)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:38:13)
and then I
Then I became a librarian after a while. And so I did that at a an an elementary school in San Antonio. It's on the west side of San Antonio, which was a place that I loved working and I loved being a librarian. And I I got this stupid
idea one of my principals who was like hey you need to become you need to get into administration you know to become a principal and so I did that and then he went to another school and I went with him as an instructional coach which I hated and I was like I don't and and but this was all in the time that I was getting you know the the younger kids and it was just it was a lot
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:38:59)
Yeah, yeah. I I was about to say, so
were you and your husband both teaching while you're also adopting your children during this decade basically, right?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:39:09)
Yeah.
Yeah. We were both teaching and then I was getting my second masters degree to become a a a principal and I was doing that only because it's more money and for the kids
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:39:20)
Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:39:21)
and that and I just like
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:39:23)
How do you do that? I'm sorry. Like because also teaching, you're giving so much of yourself mentally and emotionally to other people's children, coming home, taking care of your children, and you're going for your second masters. Like, is are there parts of those years you don't even remember because you were just like go grinding through?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:39:43)
you know yeah, it was it was a hard time. So some of those it's just I I don't know how I did it. I know I did it 'cause of my husband. He's so supportive and
You know, I would go to school and him and the kids would go to the Whitty Museum or they'd go to, you know, some other play place or they had their own little thing and while I was going to school. So it was always him there supporting me and everything.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:40:07)
Like it's I just was thinking about during that time you also had your hysterectomy during that time, right?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:40:14)
Yeah, like a little after that. Yeah, like right after 'cause I wanna say gosh, I started in two thousand fourteen with the getting the principal degree, finished in sixteen and then in eighteen had that.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:40:27)
so Gen X though. She's just doing it, is gonna do it. But you did not enjoy
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:40:31)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:40:31)
the administrative side of being in education?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:40:33)
No
at all. It was t it was a it's a lot. Talk about no time with your family at all. they, you know, that whole well you need to come in really early and stay really late and, you know, work with the teachers and do this and that and it's like nah. It it made me hate education a lot. A lot. Yeah,
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:40:52)
Yeah. Yeah. It's a lot of politics too though, right? Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:41:00)
you
You make the wrong person upset in
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:41:04)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:41:04)
and upper Are you talking about politics, politics or like politics within the the people? Yeah. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:41:07)
No, the school politics I think are very childish from what I can tell. And I'm not in it, but
they seem very petty and to your point, right? If you piss the wrong person off, it's like they're out to get you now. Yeah. Yeah. And they're very sensitive.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:41:19)
yeah, yeah. Especially if it's a higher up and that whole business and
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:41:24)
Did you ever become a principal?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:41:27)
No, the the time that I was a s an instructional coach.
We were doing a lot of administrative duties and we had an assistant principal who was out a lot, so I would have to do her duties as an assistant principal with discipline and you know, all the stuff that she had to do. and then I moved schools when my principal went to another district and you know, that whole regime of people that were there were my God.
It was it was a it was a bad situation and I
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:42:05)
I just I'm
amazed that you did this w and and were a mother to five. I'm just I'm in awe. I'm in awe of all of that. How long did you stay in the administrative position?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:42:16)
So I did that for eight or nine years and you know, I
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:42:20)
Wow.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:42:20)
I would t I told one of my friends who was also
In the same office with me. She was also an instructional coach. And I was like, I kept telling her those last couple of years, I was like, you know, God always puts you in uncomfortable positions to make you quit or leave or do s or move to make you move. And
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:42:40)
Push them.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:42:41)
it got to the yeah, it got so bad that I was like, I'm done. I
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:42:44)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:42:45)
I'm gonna I'm gonna try and become a librarian again in the district where my kids go, which was you know, 40 miles away.
back so I could be close to home. so I did and I got a job here as a librarian back in my you know, f where I loved, but it was no longer the same. The library position turned into a different position, into a technology position of incorporating this, that, the other, you know, it was no longer about reading for fun and read you know, books and
all these parents coming in and challenging books and it it became this it wasn't enjoyable so I went back to that saying like I'm being pushed to move and I I had started in 2020 doing what I'm doing now and you know I I started doing like Gen X content
And
not by
choice, but just by accident. I was like, you know, TikTok at the time during the shutdown was all about, you know, lip-syncing, dancing.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:43:58)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:43:59)
And I wasn't into that. And one day I was just like, I'm gonna make a skit about growing up and I'm gonna make a skit about me going to the the convenience store and buying cigarettes for mom. And
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:44:12)
Mm-hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:44:15)
That I went to bed that night and it was doing really well. The video was like a hundred thousand views, and I lost my mind. I was like, my god, I woke up, it was at over a million, and I was like, my god, like this is crazy. And then people young, younger kids, like, is this real?
and ask you know and and responding
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:44:38)
Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:44:39)
and then our like older people like my god I I totally forgot we did that and so it just turned into the next video was not only did I buy the cigarettes but I also bought beer so I did a skit about that
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:44:53)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:44:55)
and then I just started doing stuff what it was like growing up you
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:45:02)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:45:02)
know and so at that time
In twenty twenty, no h hardly anybody was doing skits at all. so I was like one of the f I'm not gonna say the only one, but I was one of the ones who started kind of doing that with some others, right? but they were doing skits on different things, like what it was like to be a teacher or whatever it was.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:45:22)
Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:45:22)
And I just I would I started enjoying coming home from work and and doing these little skits. And
to where it was like I finally said, you know what? Maybe I should just do this full time. You never know. It could turn into something. I just said this in my head and my husband's I'll do it. And I was like, no way. Like how in the heck are we going to like we're both teachers. We're we just bought this house in 2017. We have five kids. Like he's like, it'll work out. It'll work out. Like
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:45:57)
Amazing.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:45:58)
just do it. Try it because you're gonna hate yourself if you've never tried it.
And so the money that I had made at the time, I never used. I saved. And I was also making like these little t-shirts with my Cricut and selling them at school. And so I had about half a year's of teaching salary set aside in a savings that we never touched.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:46:23)
Wow. Wow.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:46:25)
So he's like, We'll just fall back on that.
And so we're like, okay, well I'll sub if I need to, right? I subbed for one day and then I never had to go back to sub again because things were just like were picking up and I mean not to say that it was it ran smooth through the whole time. There was ups and downs, but everything would just always fall into place to keep me doing with what I was doing.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:46:49)
Was it mainly TikTok? Or did you when did you from the very start do cross platform or did you just focus on TikTok?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:46:58)
first it was only TikTok and so what happened on TikTok is I was doing really well and then one day from one day to the next nothing zill like everything just plummeted which with a lot of creators right algorithms change this whole
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:47:14)
Yeah. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:47:16)
thing changes I I I tried to get a talent agency who got me a couple of jobs right at that point and I was like you know let me try YouTube
So YouTube just started shorts.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:47:30)
Mm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:47:31)
So I started putting my stuff on YouTube. Nothing really happened. But I just I was like, I'm gonna keep doing it. I'm just gonna keep throwing it on YouTube. And all of a sudden, one day on YouTube, a video popped off. And then everything just like they started looking at my old stuff. I put my small town soap opera series over there. and
In order to make money at that time on YouTube, you had to be a long-form creator. So I compiled them all together, threw them on there, got so many watch hours, and was able got invited to their program, their YPP program. And
Then I started, I was putting stuff over on Facebook, started monetizing on Facebook, Instagram, you know how Instagram, sometimes they want to pay you, sometimes they're like, so
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:48:15)
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:48:19)
I just I kept building and just kept throwing things up there. Then Snapchat came along. I was like, my, let me tell you, the kids on Snapchat are brutal. Some of them are so mean.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:48:31)
So do you do you put
the same content that I'm seeing on the other platforms? Do you put that right onto Snapchat? And so you have p
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:48:40)
Yeah. Everything all like
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:48:43)
so is it is it we haven't done Snapchat, but I've been contemplating putting our shorts on Snapchat, but what's the concept? Do you get followers and then they just watch your videos just like if they were on TikTok or Instagram?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:48:54)
Yeah. So I I've had and I've been throwing my stuff over there for like a couple of years. I still don't know how to work Snapchat. So when
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:49:01)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:49:01)
you said like everybody was like for a party, they're all looking at I'm like, what? Like I just I just
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:49:05)
Yeah. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:49:07)
throw my stuff over there and just like, you know, I got in finally got invited to their monetization program. So I make my I don't know how I make the money. I just see it show up. I I feel like like an old lady over there.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:49:19)
Hilarious. That's awesome. You're like, this is great. I don't know what you kids are doing over
there, but keep it coming.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:49:25)
yeah. I'll go in, I'll
comment, and then I always get the whole thing. There's always some bratty little kid. this is a grown woman, by the way, like with my skits, and then all
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:49:34)
huh.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:49:35)
the other people are like, Yeah, she's she's talking about her youth. Who cares? You're you're miserable.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:49:37)
Yeah. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:49:40)
So I let them duke it out over there. It's just it's funny. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. So I'm I'm like I'm like, come on guys.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:49:43)
my gosh. There's that teacher training though, right? You love the middle schoolers. Yeah. The thick skin. Yeah. you can
call me names. That's all right. When when did it
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:49:53)
That's all right.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:49:54)
from when you started, when did it would you say it really started how long did it take for you before you really started taking off?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:50:02)
So I started in 2020, during the whole shutdown, in April, with a Carol Baskin video that I came
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:50:09)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:50:09)
up with a skit about. Lord have mercy. And then I I realized quickly that it was not about skits and I was doing lip syncing. And then I couldn't do that anymore because it was so boring. So in June, no, six, it was like four to s
Five months later, I was like, I'm doing skits. Like I can't live like this with these lip syncs.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:50:32)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:50:32)
And that's when it took off, yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:50:34)
Wow.
And I one thing about your content that I personally really appreciate is it's so authentic because the props
And the set that you set up. The effort. Well, yeah, the effort, obviously, but it's real stuff. It's not Chat GPT.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:50:52)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:50:53)
It's not a green screen of a fake thing. It's like like I saw your Pizza Hut dining room. You did a post
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:51:00)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:51:00)
on that recently, and I was like, my God, that's amazing. And like all the stuff behind you, that's real stuff.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:51:07)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:51:07)
That's not like a screen or anything. So the investment
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:51:10)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:51:11)
that you've been willing to make into this
To make it so authentic. Just as a follower, and I'm sure your fans, it's why you're so successful, appreciate that.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:51:21)
Yeah, you know, and I did in the beginning when when AI came out, I I tried using some screens. Cause we didn't know what we didn't know about AI. And I tried that, and I got my ass chewed. And I was like, hell, I'm not using this, right? So,
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:51:35)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:51:36)
and I do use a green screen, but here's the thing. So when you see
The backdrop of the the of the god, I w I wanna say plywood. my god, the wall, the the hex a c wall Yeah,
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:51:50)
The wood like like wood wall or no?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:51:53)
the yeah, the what do you call we had it.
Anyway, well I'll find the word for it. So I I went to my parents' house and I took a picture of their walls, right? So that's panel, wood paneling. There you go.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:52:04)
Yeah. the paneling. Panel panel. Yeah wood paneling.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:52:08)
Yeah. So I that wood paneling is from my parents' home. That's not from the internet. So that's from my parents'
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:52:13)
Okay, okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:52:15)
home. The the picture that I put in of that glamour shot is
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:52:20)
Yes.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:52:20)
it's my it's it's me. It's not a glamour shot from when I was a kid, it's a glamour shot from 2020 when I did a reenaction of doing glamour shots, all right? So I did a pose and people are like, Were you in high school then? I was No, that was me like five, six years ago. So I I I put that on the on the
screen the if you when you see the tv that's back there that's
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:52:43)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:52:43)
the t I have that TV in my room with the VCR that's all mine that I've taken
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:52:48)
Yes.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:52:49)
pictures of and put together so it's all real stuff and I don't I try not to get anything
from the internet anymore. And in my early years I did, you know, 'cause we d like I said, we were just starting, we were just building.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:53:04)
Yeah, yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:53:06)
but all all that is is my stuff.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:53:08)
No,
it's awesome. It's it's really authentic. And it's no wonder that it's resonated so so much with everyone. I mean, especially back with COVID, it's such a great time to start, right? Because everyone was home. But then to be
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:53:21)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:53:21)
able to maintain and grow after that, I think really says something that you've got something
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:53:27)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:53:27)
has it been fluid for you though? Like you have your base foundation of skits, but have you also brought in new concepts through the years as and grown in other areas?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:53:38)
You know, I always I have different series that I I've started and and that I can like I'll I'll come up with like
You know, I've got my character Chad Tech from Tech Shack, Radio Shack, right? Tech Shack to
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:53:52)
Mm-hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:53:54)
show off the old technology. So I'll I I'll start new series depending on what it is I wanna I wanna talk about. I also do I I bring my teaching skills of, you know, showing a phone and showing, you know, the difference between pulse and tone and how we got charged for it and talking about that and, you know, to
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:54:15)
Yeah. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:54:16)
I just there's some days where I and then I'll make a skit about it, you know, so I I just like different variations to teach in essence I'm teaching about the time or the technology, but just doing it in this certain way.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:54:32)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:54:32)
And just I'll I'll throw in whatever it is, you know, like a memory will pop up and I'm like, this happened and just here we go, you know, I'm gonna make a video.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:54:42)
What does your extended family think of it?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:54:47)
they they love it. The one you know, they're just like, I can't believe that, you know, it's
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:54:52)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:54:53)
cause one of my cousins who I'm she's probably in her late 60s, used to babysit me and everything, and she's always like one of my top supporters. And, you know, I saw her
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:55:04)
That's awesome.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:55:05)
and she's like, one of my characters is little Carmen. She's like, my god, you changed it from baby Carmen to little Carmen. I Yeah. So that's like she
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:55:12)
Mm-hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:55:14)
the people who know me see.
And know kind of who this person is, or like they they'll see the backgrounds,
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:55:19)
Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:55:20)
or they remember that happened, you know? So it's really cool.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:55:22)
Right. Middle
school. What about your kids? How do they feel about it?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:55:28)
You know, my kids they they love it. it used to be
shocking to see me with wigs or whatever now like it's like moms with wigs. Even the dogs, like we
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:55:35)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:55:36)
adopted the do like two of the dogs and at first they were like, what is going on? But the one that I had in here, I didn't know she was in here behind the couch by my chair. And she loves watching like me do video like make the videos. She's just like st standing around and like sometimes you'll hear snoring in the background. Like then she'll go l lay down and like, okay, I'm gonna sleep and so you'll hear that in the
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:56:00)
Well, I
I hilarious
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:56:00)
But
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:56:01)
I know you had mentioned that your husband without his support, you know, that his how much has support meant to you, but has he ha has he continued to be such a focal point of support as this has grown?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:56:18)
one hundred percent. He he's helped me set like I'm like, Billy, that's my sister. I need this, I need we're gonna do it on Riverside. We're gonna do this, putting it all together. Like he's always he loves helping. He loves like sometimes I use him in videos, like I'll do like an infomercial. He's the
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:56:34)
Hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:56:34)
background voice in that infomercial, like, get this for thirty nine ninety nine. Like so he loves whenever he can be in something. He he d yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:56:42)
That's awesome. So you guys are having some fun
too then. Yeah, it's cool.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:56:45)
Yeah, we are. The kids are having
fun with it. Like I have two, so my seventh grader, my sixth grader, they're in they just j they're in drama class, right? in junior high, middle school. so they've been in some skits that I and their friends are like, my god, we saw you in the skit. And so I think that's what they want to do too.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:57:05)
So yeah. Do their friends
know about you? Like do their do they ever have teachers or friends that say, my gosh, I follow your mom?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:57:14)
Yeah, so like they a lot of their friends will like this year for band, I I do I like I help and volunteer, but there's new kids that came in from middle school and you know, I'm serving food and they're like, What the So it's like
You know, the young like I said, I have a lot of younger generation. I have a lot of gen alphas who follow too. So it's they'll they all watch or like my one of my daughters said, a substitute asked me my last name and asked me if I was related to you. And I told her yes. She's like, my god. So
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:57:52)
That's amazing. You know, it's it's I think you're one of the first creators we've had on that has such a large Gen Z and Gen Alpha following. And I'm wondering if it's because you can connect with them through your teaching background. Like there must be something besides your stuff being completely entertaining and hilarious and all that, but there must be something about how you're presenting that that clicks with them that you grab
them.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:58:17)
It's so
from what I okay, so they loved small town drama, the soap opera series. That's how I like brought they love the drama. They love
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:58:27)
Ha ha ha.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:58:28)
the character, the snooty little Charlie character
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:58:31)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:58:31)
who's just because everybody has a Charlie, like that is
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:58:34)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:58:34)
just and I get a lot of messages and comments when I do just like
a video explaining a telephone or whatever it is.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:58:48)
Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:58:49)
They're very thankful that it's not condescending. Cause I'll
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:58:52)
Mm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:58:53)
take a question that they ask, and I'll be like, and I'll ask the question, like, what's the difference between pulse and tone? I'm glad you asked, right? And I'll explain, and they're like, Thank you for not talking down to us, because
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:59:06)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:59:07)
some will make it seem like we're supposed to know when we weren't there, you
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:59:12)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:59:12)
know? Which I I'll watch those videos and I kind of like, are you doing this for rage bait or like are
Are
you really being mean to the kids who have no clue how to do this? Be how would they know? Do
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:59:25)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:59:26)
you know?
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:59:27)
No, I I think that that is a big one probably, is that you're a safe place
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:59:30)
Mm-hmm.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:59:31)
you're a safe place for them to find out about this stuff where they know, okay, she's
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:59:34)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:59:35)
not gonna respond to my comment and use it as content to rage bait or whatever. So that I'm sure that
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:59:41)
Right.
GenX Adulting Podcast (1:59:41)
has a lot to do with it. Now when you go out and about, I mean, do you get recognized by
followers?
Carmen Q Gollihar (1:59:49)
okay, so here in my town, like I've had some incident because I go thrifting all the time. I'm I'm constantly and I'll see people looking and like everyone's like some they'll come up and they'll be like, hey, by I watch your videos by the
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:00:02)
Mm-hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:00:03)
way, and they're just like they it's it's weird because I think somebody's like looking at me like just to be like I don't know what what it is, and then I figure it out. And
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:00:11)
Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:00:13)
I and then I'm like, okay, they're not trying to like kill me. You know what I'm saying? They're like
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:00:15)
Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:00:17)
I've I've had a I've had a person who works at this one of my kids' schools who comes up and just starts talking to me. And I'm like, and I I backed up into like a bookshelf. I was like freaked out. She goes, my god, I'm scaring you! I watch your videos! And I was like, my god! Like you really freaked me out. So
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:00:37)
That's hilarious.
So do you do you mind? Like I know there's some creators that are like, come up, talk to me, I'll take a picture with you. D are you do you want that? Are you like that? Or do you kinda want more of like a little bit of a boundary when do you would you be more comfortable with more of a boundary when you're out and about?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:00:54)
it doesn't it doesn't bother me, to have somebody come up or to ask for a picture or whatever. it it doesn't bother me. As long as it's not like something where I'm like doing you know, doing something private, you know, like at a doctor's office or whatever, like up there for you know, and you're like, Hey, you know Yeah, you yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:01:09)
Right, right. Right, right, right. Yeah. Yeah. You're like half dressed and the nurse is like, Hey, can we get a self that might be
going too far. So in addition to the growth on social media, and what what opportunities or I guess because of the growth on social media, have there been other opportunities that have come your way
as a result of it?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:01:34)
you know, it's mostly at this point brand deals. I have had like a gosh, this was before the writer strike, and I can't even remember her name. She was
Did reality TV stuff and was talking, you know, and like, hey, we need to do something, and you know, and then the writer strike happened for so long that we kind
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:01:54)
Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:01:56)
of lost contact. So I know a lot of those people are out of
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:02:01)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:02:01)
jobs and whatever. So, you know, and to me it's like what I'm doing now is like perfect. I would love to maybe do some sort of, you know.
show like a one woman show or do a write a script, a a play with other actors, that type of deal. My
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:02:23)
Mm-hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:02:24)
big thing is starting, I would love is a YouTube show series based on my like totally rad video series or my small
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:02:33)
Mm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:02:34)
town drama to where I could do like a ten episode art kind of deal having a bunch of my actor friends come, shoot something and put it out there. I love
Being at home. I love working from home. I
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:02:47)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:02:48)
don't mind going out places. Like I'm going to the the Gen X cruise
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:02:53)
Mm, yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:02:53)
and so I'll be doing that with they Kelly was one of the ones who asked me to go on that. So that's that's like big for me, 'cause like I'm actually going out. and I usually don't like do that.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:03:02)
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Have
you been on a cruise before? Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:03:09)
I have. I went,
I think back in twenty four, twenty three, twenty three, yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:03:13)
Okay, okay.
Yeah, and that's gonna be a lot going on there. And I think you're probably going to be you're one of the celebrities, so you're gonna be doing s not just there, but doing things too, I would assume.
Right, right. May have to play pickleball. Yeah. Volleyball or something like
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:03:27)
Yeah, I don't know what it is yet, but I know we're doing things and
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:03:35)
Or some or something. I love that idea of a YouTube sitcom though, because like you said, a ten seas ten episode arc, you could have seasons.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:03:43)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:03:44)
You know, so you said your your actor friends, have you have you do you do like acting classes or participate in plays or anything?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:03:51)
No. I did w no.
I did one acting I did a week of acting school at the New York Film Academy back in two thousand and nine. That's the
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:04:01)
Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:04:01)
only thing I've ever done besides a drama class in high school one year
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:04:06)
Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:04:06)
and a a drama class in college one year big beginning acting. And then it's just I I don't even feel like
I
wouldn't I don't I I honestly I don't know how I've done this whole thing. I don't know. I feel like I'm just like walking and doing things and it just happens. Like I I feel what do you those people who call themselves
not those people who don't feel like that they belong.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:04:31)
Imposter syndrome.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:04:32)
Yeah.
Like I feel
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:04:33)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:04:34)
like that. Like it like how why are you how do you're not
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:04:36)
Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:04:36)
even like formally trained to do this. Well, is anybody formally trained to like act in front of their phone, you know? So
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:04:40)
Right. Right. Right. Yeah, I was gonna ask
you about that. Like, 'cause it took off so quickly, was there a point or maybe you still have those moments where you do have imposter syndrome? Did that ever threaten to derail what you were doing?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:04:59)
It it's funny. when I'm in front of the the camera, I I I feel like there's no time for anything but that character to be that person. so in the moment, no, I don't ever feel that at first I was just like at
when I first started doing this, I thought, What am I doing? Like I don't know what I'm doing. But nobody and then I it got to the point where it's like, Well, nobody knows what they're doing on this thing, you know? So th just do it.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:05:27)
Yes, yes.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:05:29)
Who cares? You know?
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:05:29)
Yeah, yeah.
I think that's if if I could go back to young me and realize even at fifty, no one really no one knows what they're doing in general. We're all just kind of winging it still and
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:05:40)
Ever. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:05:43)
s and to just go for it, not be in s insecure or scared, or have the imposter. But it's still it's hard, you know, in until you've lived long enough. And even at our age, you know, there's like you you just said, there's moments where you're like, What am I doing? And why do people like this? And what's
happening and then you just kind of still wake up in the morning and keep doing it because it's working, it's resonating, you're obviously
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:06:06)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:06:07)
having a very positive effect on people's lives. have you ever had anyone contact you and say, you know, you may made such an important you've affected their life in such an important way at a dark time in their life?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:06:22)
You know, I get I'll get emails and or DMs if I if I go like I I don't read some I don't read them on Facebook 'cause people over there have sent some crazy stuff.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:06:31)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:06:33)
So I don't go over there. but I'll get in on Instagram I'm I'll look at
I'll get some emails that I like I'll be like, I've got to clean out this box and I'll find emails or I'll get like a letter in the mail a PO box and you know, I love getting those letters because it's just like and then I i it's weird 'cause I'll hear that like, you you brought me out of a depression or I was my mom was sick and I would watch your videos and I'm thinking, how did I do that? Like
Me? Like I always think somebody's blowing steep steam up my ass. Like
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:07:07)
Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:07:08)
I always think like there's no way, but like why are all these people saying that? You know? So I have
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:07:12)
Right. Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:07:13)
to like learn to accept it because I don't feel like what I do is important, you know?
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:07:21)
you don't feel worthy. W
you don't feel what you're doing is worthy of that, those accolades.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:07:25)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:07:26)
But, you know, I think when you're in such a dark place and if what you do can just bring levity, even if it's only for five minutes, if you made them laugh. And it can totally shift their entire nervous system. You know what I mean? It could help kind of snap them out of something, even if it's just for the next hour. And if you're in a really bad place, just having that is such a gift.
And so I mean it's you you are serving in what you're doing. You know, you're affecting people. Like there's people like, you know, that aren't going through something and it's funny and it's entertaining, but then you never know that fifth person that's scrolling, it could really be the difference for them that day. And that's why
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:08:05)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:08:06)
I think also what you're doing, it's so authentic and I think that's also such a huge part of it.
And the effort you put in. So even though you whenever you get those imposter syndrome moments, just remember that. Well, to be able to connect with kids is probably the biggest largest set of proof, right? I think it's huge that that you are a Gen X personality that connects with the younger generations in the way you do. I think that's awesome. That you're giving
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:08:31)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:08:31)
them what they're yearning for. You know.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:08:36)
at first I I couldn't understand. Like I was like, am I doing I I'm the type that I always think I'm doing something wrong, right? I was like, am I doing something wrong? Because more of, you know, my following is this young group more than my own generation. Like if it it if I go down to my analytics, it's like 30% is Gen X
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:08:59)
Mm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:09:00)
and everybody else is millennial.
Gen Z and then Gen Alpha.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:09:05)
Wow.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:09:05)
And I'm like, am I doing something wrong? And then I remember this woman from Instagram, one of the Instagram people, contacted me about some program or whatever, and was just like, hey, you know, just if you have any questions. So we just talked and I was like, hey, so like
Why am I in this program? She goes, Because you have a huge Gen Z following. And I'm like, How is that possible? Because I'm old. And she's like she's like, you're connecting with them. They like they really love your stuff. And that's why you're in this program.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:09:40)
Mm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:09:40)
And I said, How do I get that to change? Like I I want to like grasp more of the older. She's like, You
You're doing what you this is what you need to be doing. You're doing it right. She goes,
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:09:51)
Mm-hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:09:51)
You've got that and you've got this. So it's a good thing. It's not a bad thing. So it took me
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:09:57)
It is.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:09:57)
time to to figure out like, it is, it's fine, you know.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:10:01)
Yeah, you have
the f you have our existing generation, but you have the future too. And in for so many of them, you may be the only tie they ever get to that time that they're yearning for that they never had. Your videos could be it right now for them. In until things shift
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:10:17)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:10:18)
culturally, which like you had said they are, but you're you're that auth the most authentic tie to that for them. So I it doesn't surprise me at all. And there's things we just won't go back to. We won't go back to old phones.
Right, that's although I feel like I saw a Gen Z make evidence. but that's going away. The telco companies are shutting that stuff off.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:10:43)
Okay, I did a video
about the I have this thing right here. Have you seen these? This is what I bought.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:10:50)
What is that?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:10:51)
It's called the X-Link. So you connect the phone line through
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:10:56)
Yeah, yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:10:57)
here and then you turn on your Bluetooth. So if they call your phone, you can answer it on your landline and talk on that. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:11:03)
No way. You could talk on like an old phone through that?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:11:07)
Yeah.
So that's what I I made a couple of videos on them. I sold a crap load of these on Amazon. I just like decided to link it. And by the way, Amazon don't pay nothing. I sold like I don't hundreds of these for that company and made nickels. But but the
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:11:24)
Yeah. That's cool though.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:11:27)
kids love that mean they they were like, I'm buying one right now. So they they bought one so that they could use with whatever landline they found at a thrift store and
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:11:34)
I was gonna say, where do
you find landlines now? Can you even buy a landline like a an old phone? Yeah. A thrift store, right? Yeah. And get the cord.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:11:40)
Thrift stores thrift stores. I buy
at thrift stores. I find them at like what do you call those shops that have the
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:11:49)
Goodwill.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:11:50)
vintage vintage like the the words a little bit more expensive, the vintage shop. Not antique stores. Antique stores, right? But they have vintage stuff.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:11:53)
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. my god, land lights
are in antique stores. That's crazy. It's funny, you think
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:11:59)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:12:00)
about all the crap we've thrown away over the years. I know, but there was no
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:12:03)
I know.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:12:04)
money. So what about your brothers? Like what do they think of what you do and are you close with them?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:12:13)
So I my older brother one okay, they're both older, but one of them who lives in New York, he loves that I do this. He thinks it's so fun. He he's like, Debbie Gibson came into the hotel because he's he works at a hotel. He's what do you call the pe the guy the head the guy that is in charge. Whatever. Yeah, there you go. And he's like, And I show Debbie your stuff and you know, and he's so funny. And he's like,
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:12:39)
He's proud.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:12:39)
He'll be
talking to a yeah, he'll be talking to like somebody there, and they're like, he's like, they knew who you were. And they're like,
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:12:45)
Hehehe
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:12:46)
I follow her. He's like, it's it's cool. My other brother, he lives with my parents. that's who I was closest to growing up. And back in 1994, my senior year, he was diagnosed with schizophrenia.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:13:01)
Mm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:13:02)
So we he know he he no he's
You know, he's on meds and everything and he knows that I make videos. He just doesn't he's a it's a little bit he doesn't he grasps it but doesn't it's it's it's been a hard life for him.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:13:19)
So how old was he when he was diagnosed?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:13:23)
He was twenty five, so w when when right, they say the age is like what, eighteen to twenty-five, and he was right at twenty-five. He
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:13:28)
Something like that. Wow.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:13:31)
he he growing up he was a baseball star and this whole like he was gonna go to co college and play baseball and he got hurt and it was this whole thing and of course, you know
We didn't under he was taking drugs and at that point, now that I think about it, was he taking drugs because of he was hearing things, you know, maybe he started, you know, at that point.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:13:56)
Right. Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:13:59)
but he got into a car accident at age twenty five and hit his head. And so the doctor, you know, when they explain it to you, they're like, you know, sometimes the gene is there and it takes like some sort of trauma to
For the gene to like react or whatever it is.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:14:16)
That is so interesting. Wow.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:14:19)
and all of a sudden, it was probably it was sometime in my senior year, he was still living at the house, and then it you would hear him talking to himself, and just weird things were happening, and then this was after the accident, and then
All of a sudden one day he just he took a shotgun and went outside and tried to.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:14:48)
He tried to kill himself with a shotgun. So how do you
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:14:53)
The voices
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:14:54)
I would think a shotgun, how do you try with a shotgun and still be standing?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:14:58)
My dad
my dad my dad I told my dad he went out with a shotgun and my dad chased him and tack and Yeah. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:15:06)
So you s you saw him go out with the shotgun. Thank
God. Thank God. What a what a day. No, so that was your senior year?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:15:16)
That was my senior year and he got we called nine one one, the ambulance came and he got put into the state hospital for months and was there, so
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:15:29)
And did
that help him being in the hospital?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:15:33)
You know, no. It's like
The medication for schizophrenia is painful apparently. I guess especially when it first started, like it would hurt his body and so then they would and and a s when when you're in a hospital like that, they try to also shut you up. So they give you other medications. Yeah,
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:15:58)
Yeah, they don't give a shit. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:16:00)
they don't they don't care. So you know, and he stayed with my parents and my parents didn't my dad
would give him his meds and then if you miss a med, you're done. Like it's like you start all over and so then he we had him like a like a group home and those are horrible. There's no place for
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:16:20)
Yeah. No.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:16:22)
people with mental illness. There's no I don't care how rich you are, there's no one who can help you. And
So he's he's with my parents and g still he helps my dad a lot, with my mom because my mom can't walk. and his medications are regulated, and there's a doctor that he goes to that kind of has it like right. Like he's he's good. He's not one hundred he'll never I I don't I will never see that person I used to know.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:16:55)
And you guys he was the one you were close to through childhood. But you but you were like you said, you're suspicious maybe even when he was younger before this happened, he was trying to self medicate, maybe. Looking back.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:17:08)
Yeah, I I think so with the
with the whole drugs, yeah. Because they always talk about like reasons people are taking drugs and you know, to to get rid of what it is that they're hearing. Which is another reason. Like I growing up I did, you know, you know, you mess I I I I won't t I
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:17:27)
Right. We all did.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:17:29)
I won't touch I won't touch a you know, my friends like, Take a gummy for your anxiety. No, I ain't taking none of that shit. I would rather
face what I need to face, fearful or whatever it is, then what could happen to me?
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:17:47)
Right.
Right. I think you're justified in that though, right? You with your between your brother, your aunt, and your niece. And her mom. And then and your mom and your own response when you were you know, with the what's the right word? the hormones. The hormones and stuff, yeah. Yeah, yeah. So I yeah,
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:18:04)
Yeah. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:18:05)
you have you have a leg to stand on. Yeah, yeah. You have a good you have a good rationale.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:18:08)
Yeah, yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:18:09)
With the medication, with the schizophrenia, what is it what are they trying to accomplish with that medication? Does it try 'cause like you what like with the antidepressants it's trying to reak
reconnect things so that you know, or anxiety, it's trying to reconnect stuff, hard the hard wiring. Is it trying to literally shut off voices?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:18:29)
Yeah, like that 'cause that's the biggest thing are those are those voices that they experience. And it's it's so weird. because I was following in twenty twenty in the beginning, there was this one guy I used to follow, and I don't know if he's still around, but he had schizophrenia, and he was talking about what the voices sound like. And if you've ever heard that, it is the scariest thing, and it's no wonder.
they take drugs or they do whatever it is because it sounds like demonic. Like from what he was explaining, what he experienced and and and what he heard. So, you know, and he he talks about he talked about the medication and the kind of like that whole rewiring to like get you to stop hearing those voices. But there's something in the medication that does something to their body and just
it it's it's hard for them to stay on the medication sometimes, because of that. But h we finally found something that he he he takes that doesn't affect his body that way anymore.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:19:37)
And go ahead, sorry. I'm I'm curious, have you ever been able to have a conversation with him about it? Where is like where he's in a lucid enough state to describe it?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:19:48)
I've never spoken to him about what he hears 'cause I just I I'm always afraid like I don't wanna take him down that road if he's not hearing it, you know. You
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:19:57)
great point, yeah. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:19:59)
know, so
You know, I'll ask him how do you feel and you know, like just how's your body feeling and you know, he's fine. And he remembers, you know, he we'll talk about stuff like growing up and, you know, like when Hulk Hogan died, we had like a big old conversation. Remember when, you know, we used to watch the cartoon? Like he was still older, but he loved the cartoon, you know,
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:20:20)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:20:23)
and just like and you know, so he still has like a lot of
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:20:27)
He's there. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:20:28)
He's still with it. Yeah. It
it was amazing to me because my mom has I I took over three containers to for her medications and this and that. And when she this past year she had another heart attack and we had to like go and like it was it was a rough ride. And as I was doing everything and writing everything down for my dad and this and that, and I was asking my dad, okay, dad, no.
I'm gonna have to leave. What are you gonna do? And my brother is like, she needs to take this, this, that, and the other. So he knew ever he he has he's still with it,
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:21:01)
Yeah. Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:21:03)
but the delivery is really slow and it's very like he's still kind of, you know, he he's in it like an his eyes are glossy like in a daze a little bit, but he's still,
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:21:14)
Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:21:15)
yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:21:15)
And it's amazing though that both your that he he can live there with your parents and that your dad is able to be there to, you know, kind of be keep an eye on him and make sure in addition to your mom. 'Cause how old is your dad?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:21:27)
Yeah.
My dad is eighty three. If he's a strong little shit, my dad. Like he's he's Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:21:31)
Wow. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Cause that's a lot, right? 'Cause you know, yeah
with your mom and then your brother too. But that's wonderful that your brother has a place to be, 'cause you're right. Yeah. There isn't a place. And there is now is
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:21:46)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:21:47)
is that have there been other relatives? Have you found out that like s a great aunt had this? Like can you trace it back to any family that also had this?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:21:56)
Yeah, so there's a gene. I know that in my it and it comes from my dad's side and he had an aunt who was schizophrenic. But then my one of my dad's sisters, she had a son who was like my brother, athlete, beautiful, like he was gorgeous, like just this had everything, and then all of a sudden,
just started hearing voices and things changed and he no longer he's him and his girlfriend broke up and he lived in they built a little place for him out behind their house and he he committed suicide. He could he couldn't
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:22:39)
my gosh.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:22:40)
take it that was in the late eighties that that happened.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:22:44)
Do you feel that this that schizophrenia is discussed enough openly and the normalization around it, the discussion is has been brought to light enough, or do you think it's still this like dark secret that no one talks about?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:23:00)
I believe it's a dark secret and people don't wanna talk about it because people get ba it i people make fun of it. Like, you're hearing voices or whatever. It's a joke to some people, right, who don't know what it's like to actually live or be around somebody who's experiencing it. It's a very horrible, horrible disease, right? Just like people with bipolar disorder and stuff, it it's people are afraid to discuss it, I think, and are afraid
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:23:27)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:23:27)
to admit that they have it.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:23:29)
Yeah. It's pretty next level. Well, I mean, imagine, you know, you don't know when it hits. So it could be and the person could be masking for a few years before everyone. Well they're start they're trying to figure that that out, right? We all think and we all have a voice, an inner voice, but this is very Yeah, this isn't that it's to
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:23:47)
Different.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:23:48)
your like you're saying, if it's demonic, it's almost like Hollywood depicted it pretty well in w some of the movies they put out.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:23:55)
yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:23:55)
But then to be living a quote unquote normal life as a normal person and then this creeps into your life. And especially at a young age before your frontal lobe is even closed. Your frontal lobe doesn't even close 'til you're like twenty six. You're having all this go on at some of the most important times of your life. You might be at college, you know, you're a young adult. How heartbreaking. I mean, what a tragedy
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:24:15)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:24:15)
for these people that are suffering. It would be it would be amazing if more real talk happened around this topic and it was more normalized.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:24:24)
Yeah.
Yeah. You know, and and it's crazy because I I read in a research about people that have schizophrenia that they were popular in school and they had all this going for them and then this happens. It's not like it it it it you know, you always think of somebody who was like who has it that they were just some they've had Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:24:45)
Yeah, they're not some recluse that's or whatever,
right? Someone they're not that person. Yeah,
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:24:50)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:24:51)
to your point, they were fully functional and normal, then all of a sudden,
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:24:54)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:24:55)
boom. And what is shock to friends and family? And then how do you deal with that? So now, is it something that is there are there tests you can take to see if you have the gene? Like a blood test?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:25:09)
That I'm not sure of. That would be good to know if there was, you know, 'cause of the kids and stuff like that, you wanna know if somebody, you know, how to deal with that.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:25:19)
Yeah, well, I think for anyone, like that could
be just a general when you turn eighteen, get this test type for everybody. 'Cause no one knows, right? It's kinda like a bomb that is
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:25:25)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:25:28)
it gonna go off in your life or not. I mean what's better not knowing. No, I think it'd be good to be aware 'cause then you wouldn't if stuff starts happening you at least have an answer and you have awareness,
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:25:39)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:25:39)
you know, 'cause the not knowing has gotta be terrifying, especially for the person they're they're the first ones to go through it and they're probably like, What the fuck was that? Yeah. So
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:25:48)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:25:49)
So you know. So do you and your brother still talk pretty regularly though?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:25:54)
Yeah, so I I go visit my parents often and, you know, so we chit chat and stuff like that. But he's got other health issues. What what am I, fifty? So he's fifty eight, you know, he's diabetic, he's got heart is I think he's developed a heart issue and stuff like that. So it's like the poor guy just has a
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:26:12)
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:26:15)
and being that I'm Cathol or Hispanic, right? Or we believe in
some like superstitious stuff and you know like we always were like man I f with my parents that somebody always had something against my parents you know maybe and it's weird because you always think about like was it you know is it a a family member or an old girlfriend or like we we believe in that superstition like people like
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:26:41)
Right, right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:26:42)
who have these curses on people. Yeah, yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:26:44)
Like like a hexamos or a curse? Like is this like a revenge?
I had had not heard of that. That's a thing then in the Hispanic community of there's like curses on people or things like
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:26:55)
Yeah.
and and yeah, and y you know, you growing up, I was I used to watch scary movies all the time, as we all did, right? And I watched them alone and I was
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:27:03)
Yeah. Yep.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:27:06)
like five years old and watching these scary movies. Well, I don't know what happened. I watched I went to the movie theater and I watched god, with we just talked about this movie where he turns into a
He turns into this moss man. It's like four movies in one.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:27:26)
Like the swamp
thing type movie?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:27:29)
Yeah, but it was with the Stephen King. Stephen King's
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:27:31)
okay, okay. Okay. N not it.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:27:35)
No, he's got like it's like four stories. The man there there's an old man with the roaches. Then there's like So I watched that
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:27:42)
yes. Yeah I know what you're calling. I remember that. Yeah. I remember that. Yes. Chunks
of Yes. It was like like four movies in one or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. my god, I forgot about that. I totally forgot about that. Yeah. Weird shit. Wow.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:27:49)
He was even in the movie. Yeah. God, what was that movie? We just talked about it. Yeah. So I watched that,
right? And for some reason, out of all the movies, I watched Amityville Horror, I watched Poltergeist I watched all this crap. That movie freaked me out. and it was when he turned into like he like full moss, like his body just like I
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:28:10)
Yes, yes.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:28:13)
that messed me up. So I was so scared.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:28:16)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:28:17)
I couldn't
sleep. My parents were like, You're not sleeping with us. We told you not to be watching movies, blah, blah, blah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:28:21)
Ha ha ha.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:28:22)
So they took me to my Tia's house, my aunt, and I went in and I was laying on the couch and they put a sheet on me and she took an egg which is called the web the Huevo And so they put it on you and 'cause they feel like you you have you've been it's called the susto because you're scared or whatever. So they take the evil out of you.
And before I went under like under the blankets, the sheet, I see my cousin who one of them that I became really close to, Jesse, and he's in the corner, he's eating like a banana, watching like it all because this is so normal in our culture. Yeah. And so we go under, they do they're praying, they're doing the whole thing, and you know, I come out and I'm like, this shit didn't work because I was so scared. I was scared more than ever.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:29:15)
I'm more
weirded out. That's so funny. That's
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:29:17)
so
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:29:18)
hilarious. But I love how it's just normal. Like he's just like, Yeah, that's just a Tuesday, you know, whatever. I've seen this before.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:29:21)
Yeah. Yeah, he was just and I talk about him, I said
the Yeah, I was like, I remember you're just peeling the stupid banana and you're all watching me go through this traumatizing experience.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:29:32)
You know, that
that series of movie the one that freaked me out was the roaches. The roaches freaked me out.
I still can picture that. I totally forgot about that. W the stuff we watched. I th no, don't they
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:29:42)
One goes in his mouth, right? I
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:29:45)
go they all go in his body, don't they? It was some
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:29:47)
No. yeah, and
then it comes I I don't god, what is it?
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:29:49)
And then it comes out, it comes
out. I can't but it was something like that. We saw some weird shit though growing up. growing up a with the things we were supposed to watch. Well, on that note I ha I wanted to ask you, out of all of the movies of our generation, which one would you say resonated the most with you or is your favorite eighties movie or Gen X movie?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:30:12)
Favorite? Okay, so that movie was called Creep Show. I just looked it because I I'm not gonna rest creep.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:30:15)
There you go. Okay. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:30:18)
gosh. one of my favorite ever movies is I I have two that I really love, but it's from the nineties.
One of them is dazed and confused, even though it took place in the 70s.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:30:33)
Yes. Right.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:30:36)
It was shot in the 90s, which had that very similar vibe of the and it was that little independent type of thing that I related to because they they were in a small town, they were partying in a field, they were doing all this stuff. They thought they had it so damn bad, right? And it was like
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:30:49)
Yes.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:30:50)
actually the you know, a a great time. But it takes place over this one night, which was very reminiscent of what we did.
And then you know you go to the other s end and I love clueless.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:31:06)
Mm-hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:31:07)
because if you watch that movie in ninety-five versus watching that movie now
Not having been alive in 95, you don't see what we saw.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:31:19)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:31:19)
You see these girls, yeah, they're rich, they're talking on phones, which is very normal. When we saw that, we're like, what the hell? They all have phones like in 95? Like that's crazy. Like
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:31:27)
Yes, yes, yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:31:31)
it was such a shocking thing to see. And the way that they were dressed
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:31:36)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:31:36)
was so it it was it was fashion forward because we weren't there yet.
Right? Like we were getting there, but we the plaid skirts, all that stuff
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:31:48)
Yes.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:31:49)
was coming in. It is why it came in. and that whole that whole look. I love that movie because it it just it shaped so much of of that part of our generation.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:32:02)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:32:03)
And watching it now and watching it then is so different. You have to remember when you watch it now what it was really like then.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:32:13)
Yeah, you're right. You're so right. You're so right. I think another movie
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:32:14)
You know.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:32:17)
like that is Reality Bites. Reality Bites really
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:32:19)
Love that.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:32:20)
captured that moment in time for so many of us. And f I don't know if if you're
you know, younger watching it now. If you're from the younger generation and you watch it, it may just seem all kinda like, what's the big deal? But it was all so nuanced, but it it really was like that. Like it was almost like you were with them on that day
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:32:40)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:32:42)
and their lives as they and that's that struggle in your when you're in your early twenties of just, who am I?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:32:48)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:32:48)
I just got out of college. Who am I? All of it. So but you're so right about clueless. So right about clueless though. And and that whole cast
is just iconic. Iconic. I love that cast. And Dazed and Confused, absolutely. Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:33:01)
love it. I love that they're bringing it back.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:33:05)
And then what about what would you say is your TV show you go to from your childhood that's like that was your show, your comfort show or you just wouldn't miss it.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:33:17)
back in the day that I I loved and I I couldn't miss, I love 90210. Like I could not miss an episode. I did not want to miss an episode. I love the whole Brendan Dillon for life. You know, Kelly can come on.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:33:32)
Yes, yes, I feel the same way.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:33:36)
But now I was talk it's funny. I was talking to my husband yesterday about what my comfort show is now. And it's so ridiculous. It's family matters. I yeah,
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:33:47)
Really?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:33:49)
I and I like the sh I loved the show growing up, but
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:33:51)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:33:52)
like recently, like I'll be
writing a script or doing something or just like in a mood and I'm like, I need to watch Urkel. Like I need to watch him. It's just so cute, so funny,
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:34:01)
Yeah. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:34:04)
so it's wholesome, but there's kind of like a little spice to it. Like with the kids.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:34:08)
Yeah, yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:34:09)
Like he's just like won't leave her alone. But
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:34:11)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:34:12)
it just it it takes me back to just this time of everything was for me at that time was just so easy and just so like
I I don't know, I just I I'm able to think about who I was at that point in my life and and everything was just so easy, you know?
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:34:31)
No, that makes
perfect sense. And then what about music? What was your who's your artist from our time?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:34:39)
I have so many, so many I've done videos about Madonna. I'm a 90s Madonna girl. I I love 80s Madonna, but there's something about 90s Madonna that shaped my youth. I was in high school and that whole business with erotica, the whole thing, like your your your your hormones are changing, and then you're listening to the song, you're like, crap, like like what's going on? Like,
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:35:04)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:35:07)
So I I love me some nineties Madonna. Janet Jackson, I love. I went to see her two years ago, a couple of years ago. I cried. I was just like, my God. Like she saw me in the crowd dancing. She blew a kiss. And I was like, is
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:35:20)
wow.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:35:20)
it to me? She's yeah, you. I was like, and I like I wanted to faint. Everybody in the crowd beside me was like, my God. So I love I love her, yeah. Pearl Jam. I will listen to
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:35:24)
That's hilarious. That's awesome. That's awesome. That is awesome. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:35:31)
Pearl Jam and just like love Pearl Jam. I just
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:35:36)
Were you a Nirvana girl
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:35:36)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:35:37)
at all?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:35:38)
I love Nirvana. I love I listen to every genre of music. that's why like my husband and I are so like together, 'cause he's the same way. Like our our I will listen to grunge pop
country, it it just anything from that time frame, like it it I was everywhere. Hi I I listened to Tejano music. That's when like Selena and Emilio, all of them like so yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:36:04)
Yeah. Yeah. I think music do
you guys go see live music?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:36:11)
We try to, when Ticketmaster gives me free ticket.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:36:14)
Yeah.
No, it's
it's cr it's gotten so crazy, but live live music, that's our thing. You know, we're we've we love music. But I find especially when life has gotten crazy through our marriage and journey and raising kids, that's how we've realigned is either listening to music in the backyard or going to a s any type of concert. It could be a cover band, but just get
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:36:38)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:36:38)
it's it just snaps you back into who like you said, who you were then. It's like you remember
there I am. I'm in here. I under
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:36:48)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:36:48)
all this stress and pressure of life, I'm still here and we're still here. And it kind of just kind of
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:36:53)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:36:54)
brings it all back. It's recalibrating. So yeah. Okay, so before I ask my last question to I do. I have two questions actually. One is you just mentioned it about your script. I'm what's your creative
process?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:37:08)
gosh. I think of something and I just write about it. I don't know. It's it's crazy. I I'll either I'll either
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:37:15)
Family matters. Family matters.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:37:18)
P if somebody like will put something in the comments like, hey, how about like we'll get to discussing it'll bring up a memory and I'll write a script about it and figure out what series I'm gonna put it in. if I buy like I've been on a Garfield kick lately like a maniac and I'm like, how can I use this? let me use my kid characters. You know, it's it's about not just telling that story about that th those characters and that type of character and
It's also teaching showing what was in at the time, you know? So I'll sit down and just like I have I ha I have writing days. Like Tuesday and Wednesday, I'll try to write all my scripts for the week. Or I'm sorry, Monday, I'll do that.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:38:08)
What do you con what
do you consider a script or is it is it an idea or is it like, Okay, I wanna this is kind of scene one, scene two, sc you know, that kind of thing, or is it more just get it out and then revisit it?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:38:19)
I just
get it. I d I just like I just Monday I'll sit down, think about stuff, go through comments, go through things that I've written down maybe on my phone an idea, and I'll pull out I have like thousands of folders and then I'll pull it out, I'll write a script. I don't do anything fancy, it's just l like dialogue all the way down. And I have it down to where if I know how much I've written, that's gonna be a minute. 'Cause I try to get my stuff to at least one minute to monetize, right? For monetization.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:38:42)
Yeah, yeah. Yep. Yeah. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:38:45)
And then so I I'll I'll I'm
I'm like, okay, do I make this into a script or do I make it into a teaching video? Or do I do both? So sometimes I do both. And I'll write on Monday, I'll write like three scripts. And then on Tuesday, I'll film everything, like film those. And then on Wednesday, I'll write two more scripts. And then film those two. And then have I I try to be a week ahead now. So
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:39:08)
Mm-hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:39:09)
everything that I've done this week is for next week. but I just like get it out and write it, and then as I'm
performing I'll change or I'll be like getting ready. no, let me change this to that one script and change it up. So it's like a it's changing even as I'm filming.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:39:29)
Do you do you do your own editing and everything? Post production? Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:39:33)
I everything's on my yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:39:36)
And that takes so much, right? Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:39:38)
Yeah, it's a lot of work.
I ha so that's why I I keep with the schedule. I used to film seven videos a week and it was too much because it takes a lot of work and
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:39:50)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:39:51)
I went down to five, which has made life so much easier and has helped me so much more with the algorithm also. Like it's just enough to push out. So like with seven videos like for shoot.
I was getting maybe five, six million less views on on YouTube and then I cut it down and now it's like booming.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:40:16)
So you're not posting every day?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:40:20)
I post Monday through Thursday. I don't post Friday. I post Saturday and not Sunday.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:40:27)
Interesting. 'Cause there's so much out there about you gotta post every day, you gotta post every day, you gotta post every you don't think
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:40:32)
no.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:40:33)
that's a thing, really?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:40:34)
No, in the beginning, it depends on where you are, I think,
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:40:38)
Mm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:40:39)
and what type of content. So in the beginning, I got into the YouTube creator program, the white there where they would tell us, Okay, for this month, we want y'all to post every month for a prize, right? Here's a here's a prize that I got for doing that.
And so yeah, so I did that and I wouldn't get as many views and you know it's just playing with who you are as a creator and what works
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:41:09)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:41:09)
and what works is what's mentally good for your, you know, good for you because seven was killing me and I think I found that right.
thing with the five. And then I'm like, now that gives me time to like just post pictures or do a story. One of the my favorite things is this little area back there. I don't know if you see this radio. So I do there's Johnny Depp and there's River Phoenix. I'll do
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:41:34)
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:41:39)
lots of little pictures over there and then write about my life.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:41:43)
Mm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:41:44)
What was happening to me in that life? I absolutely love doing that.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:41:49)
And it's a n
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:41:49)
And when
somebody s steals one of those pictures, it drives me up the wall.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:41:53)
Like you mean like well they'll
they will literally take your content and what you wrote and repost it as their own?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:41:59)
They'll s take the picture, put their slap their label on it, their logo, as if it's theirs, and then write whatever it is that they want to write on there.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:42:09)
What
a trip. Have you had anyone make a fake account of you or use your content?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:42:15)
A lot, yeah. It's easy to get removed on I can remove those easily on Facebook. YouTube is second easiest impossible almost to do on TikTok. It takes so long to report one and you have to report numerous before they'll take it down.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:42:33)
Well, do you let people have access to your content so that they can repost it on their stories and stuff? Or do you not do you know what I mean? Like 'cause we'll get sometimes
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:42:42)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:42:43)
alerts what the term is. Yeah, we'll get alerts like, you know, ten of your cl ten of your videos are being used by other people. And I can go look and it sometimes I can see who's using it, sometimes not. But it seems like they're just reposting on their stories and stuff.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:42:58)
So are you talking about like for Instagram? Facebook? Yeah. So
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:43:00)
No, Facebook. But Instagram. No, no, Meta. So Facebook and Instagram, both of them, yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:43:04)
y I I leave it on so that they can repost.
They I leave
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:43:07)
Okay.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:43:08)
so because that push if it's a story, it still has my branding on it. They can still come back to the original video of me, right? And I will still get credit for that. if they down downloading it.
I I now I have to put my logo on everything in case they download it and then just upload it to theirs without giving me any credit.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:43:28)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:43:30)
so that they see. But some are so shisty that they'll put their logo right on top of it. Like that's not even Yeah. Yeah, no, for sure.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:43:35)
And it's really nothing you can do. Yeah. Some people just suck. Yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah.
What was your other question? My other qu I guess
you know, people who adopt children are saints in this world and and I think you and your husband are a pair of So it's it's awesome you guys do that. But she became she became a mother. Yeah. No, I
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:43:50)
You it's it's yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:43:55)
get the symbiotic relationship part of it it but at the same time it's
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:43:58)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:43:59)
pretty pretty damn cool actually.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:44:02)
It's really It can be difficult. Where I live now, I'm not don't live in my old town. it's I don't have to hear those aren't her real kids. When I go home, I have to I have t those aren't her real kids. So I don't like to go home. You know,
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:44:22)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:44:22)
like to to some Yeah. Yeah. Those are my kids, yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:44:23)
Yeah. It's a load of shit though. Yeah, yeah. Those are your kids. Yeah, a hundred percent. God
himself sent that message. Those are your children. There's no question.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:44:31)
Yeah. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:44:34)
Yeah. So okay, so you have any more? I I don't think so. I start I start doing that because when we first started doing this, I would wrap up and he'd be like, I had three more questions. So now I just stop and
I say, Do you have any more? So now I try to track a mentor. Yeah, he's like I gotta get my your iPad so you can keep it tracked. But do we get
at all? Yeah I'm good. I think so. Okay. Yeah. My my last question is
always where do you see yourself in five years?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:45:01)
my gosh. rich and famous now. I would I know, yeah. Yeah, I need to see the same one. Like
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:45:05)
Hey, you put it out there, manifest it, manifest it, manifest it. Go see the priest. That's awesome.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:45:15)
in five years, I would really like I that's my dog. Ha ha ha! I'm all that's
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:45:18)
That's okay. I thought it was ours. I thought it was ours. It's okay. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:45:23)
boast. She's a she's fun time. In she's she's a Weimariner. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:45:25)
Sounds like a big dog. Wait, what kind of dog is what wow.
that's awesome.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:45:31)
She's a she
she messed up my fingers on a leash cause she freaked out, so like I can't there been
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:45:40)
wow.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:45:41)
I'm I has it's been a year and I still have to push down. And
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:45:46)
Did they break?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:45:49)
she did something to the tendons
and I went to a hand therapist and a hand doctor who was a jerk. I was like
Is this normal? He's like, No. I was like, well, then what do I do? Like, you
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:46:04)
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:46:05)
know, he's like, Well, you have to do therapy, and you know, they charge you for ridiculous stuff, and the therapist, the hand therapist is the one or whoever is the one that does the job, and he's just like, touch my fingers. It's crazy.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:46:16)
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You go on YouTube. How much does
Yeah. How much does the ghost how much does ghost weigh?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:46:26)
Probably eighty pounds. Yeah. she's a
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:46:28)
Okay. Yeah. She sounds big. Is it a she?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:46:32)
Yeah, she's and she's a a big baby to where she thinks like she can lay on you, do and so she ends up hurting it's always me, not gonna like it's
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:46:38)
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:46:43)
always me that she hurts. Like my husband, he's like, you know, it's fine,
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:46:46)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:46:46)
but she'll be laying on me, the doorbell rings and boom and then like I'm like down for the count. Like this dog's trying to kill me.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:46:50)
yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What
color is she? Yeah, that's what I was picturing. Cool. Okay, so now your to your answer.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:46:56)
She's grey. Yeah, she's beautiful. okay, okay.
In five years, I think I would love to. We just spoke earlier about the little YouTube sitcom. That's my dream. I've always dreamed of being on a sitcom. And for years through this process, I'm like, okay, I need to find a way for somebody to call me, to get this on Netflix, to do this. And then one day I was just like, you know what? Hell no. I'm gonna do this. I'm going to.
make the call on who's on this, how it's done. I don't need anybody telling me no, you need to do it this way, that no, I'm gonna do it my way. So when I'm that's one of the things that I I'm I'm working on is let's get this script out. Let's I've got the equipment. My whole house is turned into it's not just this room. I've got my Pizza Hut room. My living room is like
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:47:55)
Right. Yes.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:47:58)
a video store type of deal, you know? I
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:48:01)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:48:02)
My husband's like, you know, you've kind of created your own set in the house, Carmen. We don't need to go anywhere. I've got a a sitting room with a console T V, an old chair, the the whole thing he goes, You've done it already. Just bring you know,
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:48:18)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:48:18)
we just need just need the actors, you know. So yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:48:20)
Yeah, yeah. Have you ever done
it's gonna happen. I mean, I'm I'm manifesting that too, but it's gonna happen. Have you ever done a tour of your home?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:48:29)
I've shown like little bits and pieces, but I haven't shown everything. I need to we're actually so it's funny, like my my room, my living room, I was like I put like movie posters up I have Clueless, I have Pee-wee's Big Adventure and Goonies and one other one for my husband, Raiders of the Lost Ark. So I was like
Man, how are we gonna do our decorations for for Halloween? So we're doing all Halloween movies, right?
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:48:59)
good idea, yeah, yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:49:01)
So every holiday we can change everything out, but so that's I'm trying to turn that into like a whole set. So I I
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:49:08)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:49:08)
do it'd be kind of cool to do like a little tour of that as I change, because I'm changing things.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:49:11)
Yeah. Yeah. Do almost like a do a
retro, like an T V Cribs episode. And then and then you
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:49:17)
yeah that'd be cool.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:49:19)
go in and it's all like stuff from our our time, you know? So that
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:49:22)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:49:23)
that's okay, I'm I'm manifesting that too. There is a there
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:49:26)
Okay.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:49:27)
is an actress. I don't know who she is, but she she does that where she's her own it's just her as the character and she'll do
You guys have to know her if I know her. I'm not you mean she's famous? Yeah, I think she was on like HBO or something or had her own show where she would do like she'd be in character as maybe an old older woman and then come back as an an old man or whatever. I'd All right, I have no idea. I'm thinking of Carol B Carol Burnett. Who? She said older.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:49:56)
Older?
Is she an older lady?
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:50:00)
No, I feel like she's our age. But it this is kind of going back too. I feel like this is was an older concept. I have no idea. If any listeners hear this and think no She's gonna go find out. Not hear this, but have hear what Brian said. Yeah. Yeah, no, we'll have to I
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:50:16)
I know I'm like
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:50:19)
I feel like I kind of know what you're talking about, but I can't pinpoint it. So I don't I don't know. Yeah. I'm out of my lane on this. That's what you remind me of kind of is like a Carol Burnett
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:50:29)
That's my I I used to have that in my my little bio. Carol Burnett is my hero. So that was a yeah, yeah. And and you know
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:50:35)
Okay. Well then that aligns. That aligns. I didn't know that. That that aligns.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:50:39)
what? I I dyed my hair red, so it's happening. It's happening.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:50:41)
there you go. I love it. Yeah, it is happening. Well, Carmen, we can't thank
you enough for spending so much time with us and for sharing your story with your fans. I mean, this is gonna be such a treat for them to get such long form access to you. And then also for our listeners and for any listeners who don't know, this is your first introduction to Carmen. Everywhere you can find her will be in the show notes. She's everywhere, especially on YouTube. You have quite the presence. I hope you
You should be incredibly I'm everyt everything's amazing, but that's quite a feat. I mean that had to have been something
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:51:16)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:51:17)
when you hit a million on YouTube, right?
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:51:21)
That was a it was amazing. And it's something that I never knew existed. It's it's so funny. Like I ni I didn't know what a playlist was and my kids had to tell me, Mom,
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:51:32)
Mm-hmm.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:51:35)
it's a big deal. Like when I first got my silver, they're like, That's huge. I was like, really? And then like they're like, Yeah,
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:51:39)
Yeah. Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:51:41)
the next is gold for a million. I was like
I was like, that's not gonna happen. And boom, they're like, mom, you're getting a gold plate. You know, if when I
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:51:49)
It's amazing.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:51:49)
take take that to schools, like when I do like a little the their little fairs, their career fairs, they're
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:51:56)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:51:57)
like, my they wanna faint that they're
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:51:59)
Yeah.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:52:00)
seeing a a a play button, play button, not playlist, play button.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:52:05)
It's it's a big deal.
It's a big and especially yeah for kids because they watch people on YouTube that are big like you, other creators, but to see that now when you do that, is it just your kids' career fairs or do you do that in different schools just as somebody
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:52:21)
i I have never done one for my kids' schools. I go to other schools. and it's where the district where I used to work in San Antonio, like I have friends who like are principals and stuff like that. Hey, can you come to my school? And I'll and I'll go to their school.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:52:36)
That
is amazing. And so are you basically talking about what you do as a content creator and kind of encouraging to them too, right? That this is an avenue that they could take that's a little different.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:52:47)
Yeah, it's not only to them is it crazy, but like the teachers are like, How'd you do that? Like they wanna know like how to get out and I'm like, you know
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:52:52)
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's actually incredible.
Think about it. When we went to careers,
Stay in in high school, it's like the Marines were there, the army, maybe someone's dead, a doctor, a lawyer, you know, some corporate police officer. Yeah, yeah. But now look at that's awesome. That's awesome. That's
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:53:12)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:53:12)
very cool. And then you get to bring that gold plaque because that is you're a role model. How about that? Well, and she has been as
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:53:17)
Yeah. That's crazy.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:53:20)
a teacher, but then she's brought that into her content as really cool. I mean, I honestly I think everything you've done is phenomenal as far as a conversation.
Content creator, and especially as a woman, what you've accomplished is just freaking awesome. But I just go back to your life too. And especially that one decade where you had pretty much everything happen to you at once. Like God just kind of said,
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:53:44)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:53:45)
Here's everything. Let's just get it over with in the next 10 years.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:53:48)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:53:49)
but
what you were able to continue to elevate to after that, it's really impressive because that would have knocked a lot of people down where they maybe wouldn't have been able to get back up again. And I I mean, obviously your faith is very important to you, but I get the vibe from you that you really try to maintain a really optimistic outlook on life in general.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:54:11)
that to me the the optimism is what gets me through my entire life. So I I I try to stay as positive as I can and manifest things and and and think about good stuff. Right. When I have my bad moments, I'll have like a bad year where I cannot get my mind into a good place. It it it's it's happened and
I have to flip a switch and be like, be thankful, keep going. There's more, there's a reason. This is your season. Like you have to just reach for it. It's gonna happen. It's or it's happening now. I have to live in the it's happening now, right? not just it's gonna happen. Because it is happening now. Cause there's days where I'll come into this room and start filming, and the first thing I'm like,
be thankful this is what you're doing. Like you're doing this is what you do for a living. This is crazy. It's been six years and it's just now hitting me, right? And people sometimes don't see, they all say, it's like you're a big creator. I w I didn't start out that way. I started out as at the time I was I was 45 years old doing this. And at 46 years old
decided to quit my entire career. You're at think about I I always think about I was forty-six where people like, you're it's too late for you. And that's my beginning is 46 for this, you know? And
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:55:52)
Yeah. You know what's cool
though? When you show up as a content creator at those job fairs, you're you're selling the dream. Like it's dream big. It's you know what I mean? It's like it's
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:56:03)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:56:03)
just different. It's like you can go you can become a cop. You go to the academy and you do this and you do that, but you're selling the dream of optimism to these kids. Like I can do that. Why not?
You're also you're also selling when we were growing up, we thought, Okay, well, by forty, you know, you you're kinda done, right? Like you've decided what you want to be when
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:56:22)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:56:22)
you grow up and then it is what it is. You know, you're sell you're also an example of you can start over your whole life
At forty, forty five. There's a whole journey here. There's still a whole journey. That that's
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:56:34)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:56:35)
not the end. That can be just the beginning. I think that Gen X in general, so many Gen Xers are being a beautiful example of that, not only for the younger generations, but for each other as peers. And I think it encourages
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:56:49)
Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:56:50)
other Gen Xers to be like, you know what, to say, hey, you always wanted to do this, just do it. Who cares? You know like
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:56:56)
Let's do it.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:56:56)
your five year plan is to have a your own sitcom. That's awesome. Yeah. Keep dreaming.
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:57:01)
Yeah. Yeah.
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:57:01)
And do it right. That's good. she will. There's no question. I know I can't wait. We'll
get our VCR out and record it. Yeah, exactly. Well, again, thank
Carmen Q Gollihar (2:57:09)
Ha ha ha ha
GenX Adulting Podcast (2:57:11)
you. Thank you so much for being so candid and so open and letting us be witness to your story and also for our listeners, for your fans, thank you so much. And again, your fans already know where to find you, but for anyone who doesn't, it'll be in the show notes. And if you want to leave any comments or questions for
Carmen. She will see them and we always love to hear from you. So please leave us any comments or questions. And again, thank you, Carmen, for everything. And we will see you next time. Bye.