<b>[Music]</b><b>Welcome to GenX Adulting and today we have</b><b>Ali with us. Welcome to the studio.</b><b>Thanks for having me.</b><b>We're very happy to have you. Our first</b><b>question is always, when were you born?</b><b>1998.</b><b>1998. So you are a Gen Z and you are part</b><b>of that cusp micro</b><b>generation that is also a Zillennial.</b><b>Have you heard of that?</b><b>I have not.</b><b>So, really? Okay. So the Zillennials,</b><b>basically they're the small micro</b><b>generation that grew up pretty technology</b><b>free as far as phones and social media.</b><b>And that stuff is more introduced in late</b><b>middle school, high school.</b><b>So you guys really got the privilege of</b><b>having a childhood that did not involve</b><b>social media and did not</b><b>involve that 24-7 access of phones.</b><b>And then you also got the privilege of</b><b>experiencing the birth of all that.</b><b>You know, when you were probably more of a</b><b>mature age and can handle it versus the</b><b>young Gen Z's and the Gen Alpha's now,</b><b>which are social media kids.</b><b>Yeah. So you kind of got the best of both</b><b>worlds. I always say you had a bit of an</b><b>old fashioned upbringing where social media</b><b>wasn't present when</b><b>you're 8, 9, 10 years old.</b><b>You can probably relate to the younger</b><b>millennial generation and also to Gen Z's</b><b>that are a few years younger than you.</b><b>So you kind of have a foot in each</b><b>generation a little</b><b>bit. Does that make sense?</b><b>Yeah, that does make sense. I think I'd</b><b>agree with that, especially</b><b>because we talk about social media.</b><b>I was on social media probably around 14</b><b>years old on Facebook.</b><b>I was the primary social media back then.</b><b>But I think the difference</b><b>was it wasn't on my phone.</b><b>So my first phone, I got my first phone</b><b>when I was 13 and it was a</b><b>Nokia that could call my parents.</b><b>That's all I had on there. I had the game</b><b>Snake on there. That's about it.</b><b>But if I wanted to go on social media, I'd</b><b>have to be at home on my laptop.</b><b>And that was Facebook, right?</b><b>You were after the MySpace, right?</b><b>I did not have MySpace.</b><b>I think that cut off and then</b><b>the older Gen Z's was Facebook.</b><b>And then Snapchat, I don't think, and</b><b>Instagram, that was more what, high school?</b><b>I think I got Instagram</b><b>around 10th grade, I would say.</b><b>So I was 15, 14, 15.</b><b>Yeah, and even Instagram back</b><b>then was a little different.</b><b>I was posting pictures</b><b>of my meals and a view.</b><b>It changed a lot.</b><b>And I went back a few years ago just to see</b><b>all the stuff I used to</b><b>post and my old posts,</b><b>make sure there's</b><b>nothing on there that's cringy.</b><b>When you're going into getting a job,</b><b>starting a career, etc., you want to make</b><b>sure you cover your tracks</b><b>from anything you may have</b><b>done when you're just too mature.</b><b>It was interesting.</b><b>It was all stuff with filters and it's</b><b>like, here's the sunset, here's a picture</b><b>of my food, things like that.</b><b>But now it's just, it feels like mostly</b><b>pictures of people and things like that.</b><b>I think it's interesting how</b><b>it's evolved from the beginning.</b><b>And then even Facebook, I don't think you</b><b>guys would be caught dead</b><b>posting updates on Facebook now.</b><b>But when it first came out, I think a lot</b><b>of your age expressed themselves like,</b><b>what is it called?</b><b>Where you post like how you're feeling</b><b>today or whatever it is.</b><b>I think in the beginning</b><b>you guys utilized that, right?</b><b>Very much so.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>And it was especially</b><b>not having the phones.</b><b>When I look at it now, because on Facebook,</b><b>it'll give you updates.</b><b>You posted this 10 years ago</b><b>today or 12 years ago today.</b><b>And it just feels like you</b><b>would go to school at that age,</b><b>spend the whole day and come back with some</b><b>thought or some idea, happy about</b><b>something, pissed off about</b><b>something, whatever it may be.</b><b>And then you just come and you drop that on</b><b>social media, just unprovoked.</b><b>And I do send some of those posts to our</b><b>group chat with like me,</b><b>Nathan and a bunch of our friends.</b><b>And it was like, God, I was a shithead.</b><b>I would just post anything and everything,</b><b>whether it's about my teacher, how I felt,</b><b>my coach, sports team, whatever it is.</b><b>And look back and you're like, yeah, how</b><b>big it is probably</b><b>shouldn't be posting all that stuff.</b><b>No.</b><b>And that's where I think it can become</b><b>dangerous, especially for the younger kids</b><b>now that and especially with TikTok, like</b><b>they're posting a bunch or</b><b>they're reposting things.</b><b>And it can be a very deep</b><b>emotional moment for them.</b><b>And they repost a video about it.</b><b>And then like 48 hours later, they're fine.</b><b>But then that repost is coming up and all</b><b>their friends feeds and their friends are</b><b>like, oh, my God, are they okay?</b><b>But it's so fleeting.</b><b>All those emotions are so fleeting when</b><b>you're an adolescent and just</b><b>the heaviness of the effect of it.</b><b>And at least with Facebook, I think when it</b><b>first came out, you could post stuff about</b><b>your teachers and coaches</b><b>and no one was coming at you.</b><b>But now people people will come for you.</b><b>Yeah, you know, the kids, if they post</b><b>things about teachers, coaches, anything</b><b>about drinking, like you can't</b><b>put anything up about partying.</b><b>It affects even getting into college, which</b><b>I don't think you guys</b><b>had to deal with that worry.</b><b>I did not know.</b><b>I wasn't even the thought, honestly, going</b><b>into college never had anything like too</b><b>bad on there was more so like you said,</b><b>going through puberty, especially as a as a</b><b>boy turning into a man.</b><b>I don't know how it is on the other side,</b><b>but I imagine it's similar.</b><b>It's a lot of brutal, right?</b><b>It's getting pissed off at absolutely</b><b>nothing, being overly excited about stuff</b><b>like posting your celebrity crushes as a as</b><b>a young boy, things like that.</b><b>Right. But then never was a thought going</b><b>into college or applying for that until my</b><b>freshman year, from my personal experience,</b><b>was when I joined a fraternity and they're</b><b>like, all right, this shit's going to</b><b>follow you around everywhere.</b><b>We need to go on there</b><b>and scrub everything.</b><b>That's excellent.</b><b>And that was something that</b><b>was common for my fraternity.</b><b>I think it was a commonality across most</b><b>fraternities, but it's like, all right,</b><b>you're eventually</b><b>going to want to get a job.</b><b>You were 15 at one point, 14, go on there</b><b>and anything bad, take it off.</b><b>Wow. That was such a service to you guys.</b><b>Yeah. Yeah, that's excellent.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>So do you what would you say is your</b><b>primary social media you use now Instagram?</b><b>And what about Snapchat?</b><b>No, I just deleted it</b><b>probably four or five months ago.</b><b>Do you find that your peers don't use</b><b>Snapchat like they used to?</b><b>I find that most what was going on on</b><b>Snapchat for me was the group</b><b>chats that we made in college.</b><b>And it's just a way to</b><b>stay in touch with everyone.</b><b>So I had a couple on Snapchat and that's</b><b>what it was used for</b><b>versus when I was in college.</b><b>It was like a means of communication,</b><b>sending pictures, which I</b><b>felt like declined a lot.</b><b>Right, right.</b><b>How do you guys communicate now then via</b><b>just text no longer Snapchat?</b><b>Yeah, that's mostly on Instagram.</b><b>It's a lot of sending DMS like</b><b>videos post things like that.</b><b>We'll have groups on</b><b>Instagram, but it's mostly text.</b><b>FaceTime has gotten a lot bigger as well.</b><b>Really?</b><b>All close friends.</b><b>It's usually FaceTime.</b><b>So you guys will text and FaceTime.</b><b>Yes.</b><b>But not just do the traditional phone call</b><b>sometimes, but most often it's FaceTime.</b><b>Like I don't think I speak to Nate on the</b><b>phone unless it's FaceTime.</b><b>That's so interesting.</b><b>That is so interesting.</b><b>So it's kind of evolved where it started</b><b>with maybe Snapchat and posting on Facebook</b><b>and putting pictures of</b><b>your food on Instagram.</b><b>And then as you grow and mature, you are</b><b>now into how quote unquote more adults</b><b>communicate as far as texting and using the</b><b>phone to talk even if it's FaceTime.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>You know, as you get older,</b><b>that's really interesting.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>Where were you born?</b><b>I was born in Manhattan, New York.</b><b>Oh, I didn't know that.</b><b>I didn't know that.</b><b>All right.</b><b>So how did your parents meet?</b><b>My parents were lived down</b><b>the street from each other.</b><b>So their families knew each other since</b><b>they were very, very</b><b>young, went to the same school.</b><b>And where is this?</b><b>Casablanca, Morocco.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>So your family is from Casablanca, Morocco.</b><b>Yes.</b><b>And your parents live down the street from</b><b>each other in Morocco.</b><b>Went to the same school from</b><b>young age from elementary school.</b><b>Really?</b><b>And were they friends?</b><b>They were friends.</b><b>My parents started, I don't know if the</b><b>words dating, but showing interest in each</b><b>other very young age.</b><b>Like my dad always tells me a story where</b><b>he used to have either soccer practice or</b><b>my dad was a handball goalie.</b><b>So like the sport handball and he would</b><b>have practice and my mom would leave</b><b>school, go up home, bring him back food for</b><b>his like to have after</b><b>practice, things like that.</b><b>So very young age.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>So that, yeah, I would</b><b>say that she liked him.</b><b>Yes.</b><b>Very much so.</b><b>Is handball a sport common in Morocco?</b><b>Not too common.</b><b>No, I don't know how we got into it.</b><b>And being a handball goalie is very</b><b>interesting because you just stand there</b><b>and people just throw a ball at you.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>And you try to catch it with your hands.</b><b>Block it, catch it.</b><b>Catch it.</b><b>Whatever you need to do just to make sure</b><b>it doesn't go in the goal.</b><b>They kind of tee off on you, right?</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Very much so.</b><b>I've never heard of handball.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>It's semi dangerous.</b><b>So how would you, is it like soccer, but</b><b>you're using your hands?</b><b>Exactly right.</b><b>And so you're basically</b><b>can pinch it at the goalie.</b><b>Exactly.</b><b>Oh my gosh.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Was he just padded up?</b><b>No pads.</b><b>No, I don't.</b><b>What about helmet?</b><b>No helmet.</b><b>No helmet, no pads.</b><b>Is that a Moroccan thing or is</b><b>that general with that sport?</b><b>It's an international sport.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>That's just the rules.</b><b>So it's just, wow.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>So no one's wearing pads.</b><b>No.</b><b>If you think about it, it's probably maybe</b><b>not in his case, but</b><b>it's a very inexpensive</b><b>sport.</b><b>You can play anywhere on any playground</b><b>without any money or facilities, right?</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>So it's just raw.</b><b>That's exactly right.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>And that's why soccer is so big</b><b>because all you need is a ball.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Like growing up in Morocco, when we used to</b><b>play soccer, we used to use like two rocks</b><b>for each goal and a soccer</b><b>ball playing on the street.</b><b>And the area I lived in, my friends in</b><b>Morocco were pretty,</b><b>pretty well off, pretty wealthy.</b><b>Right.</b><b>So they had the means, but that was just</b><b>the appeal to the sport.</b><b>You didn't need much.</b><b>You just needed a ball and a couple of guys</b><b>at low barrier of entry.</b><b>And you could just set it up and go up.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>It's playing.</b><b>So, so they met, or they</b><b>grew up together basically.</b><b>Now we're their parents, friends, since</b><b>they lived down the street from each other.</b><b>I'm not sure.</b><b>It's a good question.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>Because that's your grandparents.</b><b>Right.</b><b>So, and then did they have siblings?</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>My mom is one of seven</b><b>and my dad's one of eight.</b><b>Wow.</b><b>I may be wrong on my dad's side, but I'm</b><b>pretty sure it's eight.</b><b>Do you know where they</b><b>fall in the birth order?</b><b>My mom is, I think third or fourth oldest.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>My dad, I'm not sure.</b><b>And are their siblings still alive?</b><b>All siblings were still alive.</b><b>Wow.</b><b>Yes.</b><b>My dad lost a sister.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>And do they all live in Morocco?</b><b>They, on my mom's side, everyone lives in</b><b>Morocco except my aunt who lives in Tampa.</b><b>That's who I lived with when I first moved</b><b>here, St. Petersburg, actually.</b><b>And my dad's side, all in Morocco.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Wow.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>So you have a lot of family in Morocco.</b><b>A lot of family.</b><b>So they grew up pretty much together.</b><b>When did they get married?</b><b>Like how old were they?</b><b>Do you know?</b><b>I don't know how old they were.</b><b>I think they got married in 91.</b><b>91.</b><b>Maybe 92.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>Did they go to college in Morocco or is it</b><b>called a college in Morocco?</b><b>Yeah, it is.</b><b>I don't know.</b><b>I don't think my mom went to college.</b><b>Think my dad did some sort of secondary</b><b>school after high school.</b><b>Do you know what he studied?</b><b>He was studying finance because he worked</b><b>at a bank after that.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>Did he study finance?</b><b>Did they get married</b><b>while he was in school still?</b><b>Do you know?</b><b>I don't believe so.</b><b>Pretty positive.</b><b>He was out of school.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>A little blurry on a lot of this stuff.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>And then the investigator here.</b><b>And then did they lived in</b><b>Morocco though together in Morocco?</b><b>But then they got married in Morocco.</b><b>Got married in Morocco, lived in Morocco.</b><b>1994.</b><b>They had my older brother, Hamza.</b><b>In Morocco?</b><b>In Morocco.</b><b>And they had gone to visit St. Petersburg</b><b>at some point when they</b><b>were married and that's</b><b>what caused them to move here.</b><b>My mom really liked it.</b><b>My dad really liked it.</b><b>So they relocated here.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>So they just randomly</b><b>took a trip to Florida.</b><b>And but how?</b><b>They may have been there honeymoon.</b><b>Oh, interesting.</b><b>That's an important note.</b><b>You're seeing Petersburg, Florida, not</b><b>seeing Petersburg, Russia.</b><b>Yes.</b><b>There's a lot of people</b><b>that listen from everywhere.</b><b>Yeah. St. Petersburg, Florida.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>So might have been there honeymoon.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>So how did you get</b><b>born in Manhattan though?</b><b>What's the tie there?</b><b>They, I hope this doesn't get them in</b><b>trouble, but they had</b><b>friends there in New York and</b><b>they went over there when my mom was</b><b>pregnant with the idea of</b><b>we have this kid in the US.</b><b>He's going to be an American citizen.</b><b>Probably make his life a lot easier.</b><b>And that's what happened.</b><b>They had me.</b><b>I was in New York for probably two months,</b><b>maybe shorter than that.</b><b>I'm not really entirely sure.</b><b>And then we came back to Casablanca and</b><b>then I was in Casablanca</b><b>for about a year or two.</b><b>And then I moved over to St. Petersburg.</b><b>That's where we officially moved.</b><b>So do you have dual citizenship?</b><b>No, I'm an American American citizen.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>I need to get my Moroccan citizenship.</b><b>It's just, is that challenging to do?</b><b>Okay.</b><b>So you could have it.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>I have a Moroccan birth certificate.</b><b>I just need to get a</b><b>passport and like an ID card.</b><b>Reason I didn't get it last time.</b><b>It's a little bit of a process.</b><b>You got to go a little</b><b>bit out of town to get it.</b><b>And I was only there for two weeks.</b><b>Last couple of times I've gone.</b><b>So let's enjoy our time instead of.</b><b>Right.</b><b>Right.</b><b>Dealing with that.</b><b>Moroccan bureaucracy.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>So for people who've never been to Morocco,</b><b>how would you describe it?</b><b>Morocco is a beautiful place.</b><b>I'll start with that.</b><b>Plenty of different types of areas.</b><b>What I mean by that is on the Northern</b><b>coast, you have the Mediterranean.</b><b>So similar to a lot of</b><b>the Mediterranean countries.</b><b>Right.</b><b>And then on the other</b><b>side, it's the Atlantic.</b><b>So you have a lot of coastal areas.</b><b>Then you go inland.</b><b>There's mountain ranges, the Atlas</b><b>Mountains, known Morocco.</b><b>And then when you go</b><b>south, there's the desert.</b><b>So there's a little</b><b>bit of everything, right?</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>We have snow, we have the desert, we have</b><b>the beach and that kind of climate.</b><b>So there's plenty to do there.</b><b>Morocco as kind of like a cultural place.</b><b>It's a mix of Arabic Muslim culture and</b><b>some European and even</b><b>American influence, I'd</b><b>say mostly European, because it was</b><b>colonized by Portugal</b><b>and France and in Spain.</b><b>Right.</b><b>So that left remnants</b><b>of that kind of culture.</b><b>So it's pretty interesting when you look at</b><b>some of the other Muslim countries that are</b><b>a lot more traditional and culturally just</b><b>100 percent through and</b><b>through Muslim compared</b><b>to Morocco, where it's a</b><b>little more easy going.</b><b>Mostly everyone's still Muslim, but a</b><b>little more laid back.</b><b>So women don't have to be covered.</b><b>No, they don't have to be.</b><b>A lot of them are.</b><b>A lot of them aren't.</b><b>A lot of the younger generation isn't.</b><b>But like if you're a Moroccan woman there</b><b>and you're not covered</b><b>and you're wearing something</b><b>you'd see a woman wearing here, no one's</b><b>going to say anything to you.</b><b>It's normal.</b><b>OK.</b><b>Would you say women are held to as high of</b><b>a steam in Morocco as they are in America?</b><b>Like they're just as safe and they can walk</b><b>around on their own in Morocco?</b><b>I would say so.</b><b>OK.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>And then it's it's not</b><b>really a safety thing.</b><b>It's more of a cultural thing where it's</b><b>like, well, you shouldn't</b><b>be out by yourself walking</b><b>around.</b><b>Right.</b><b>Like you should most likely be with a man.</b><b>A lot of women also view themselves a</b><b>little differently from that aspect.</b><b>Like I'm not just going to go out and do</b><b>all this stuff like a man would do.</b><b>I'm a woman.</b><b>I'm going to take care of myself.</b><b>I'm getting married.</b><b>Having a family is a big thing over there.</b><b>Very important.</b><b>But I don't think there's any like fear or</b><b>risk or anything from that angle.</b><b>And so it's still very traditional.</b><b>Yes.</b><b>Traditional values.</b><b>Traditional values for sure.</b><b>And then you said there's</b><b>European and some American influences.</b><b>That mean there's European and Americans</b><b>that live in Morocco.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>And do they live live in like is it kind of</b><b>segregated or is it all mixed together?</b><b>All mixed together.</b><b>And when you're in Morocco, do you feel all</b><b>of those influences as you're going around</b><b>the areas that still feel very, I guess,</b><b>Muslim or more the</b><b>majority of what the population</b><b>is?</b><b>You definitely feel</b><b>the influence in the mix.</b><b>For example, French, everyone in Morocco</b><b>speaks French, mostly everyone in Morocco</b><b>speaks French.</b><b>OK.</b><b>And it's kind of like it's funny.</b><b>It's kind of like a signaling thing.</b><b>So the families that are wealthy and their</b><b>kids go to private schools, etc., the kids</b><b>mostly speak French.</b><b>OK.</b><b>That's why I learned</b><b>French when I went there.</b><b>But there's definitely a large mix.</b><b>And you see it a lot with my generation as</b><b>they grow up, they go to college overseas.</b><b>I feel that there's a lot more.</b><b>European and American tendencies that they</b><b>pick up, whether</b><b>they're positive or negative,</b><b>then you would see an older generations.</b><b>Now, is there a</b><b>college there or university?</b><b>There's plenty. Yeah.</b><b>Really. So how how big would you how would</b><b>you compare it the size of Morocco?</b><b>Like if you're going to compare it to a</b><b>state, it's about 40 million people.</b><b>OK. Wow. And sizing wise, if you count the</b><b>Sahara, which you should,</b><b>it's probably the size of California</b><b>somewhere around there.</b><b>OK. Yeah, I may be wrong on that, but I'm</b><b>pretty sure it's kind of kind of runs</b><b>vertical like that. Yeah, exactly. Same</b><b>shape, similar shape.</b><b>Yeah. And then you mentioned like so</b><b>there's some wealthy</b><b>areas and then are there</b><b>very really poor areas,</b><b>too, just like anywhere, right?</b><b>Just like anywhere. But there's it's worse</b><b>than you would see here in the US.</b><b>Like there's areas that</b><b>barely have running electricity,</b><b>may or may not have water kind of just like</b><b>shacks that people have built.</b><b>But every time I've gone back to Morocco</b><b>since I moved here from Morocco in 2014,</b><b>that's been slowly and slowly getting</b><b>eliminated and they're building</b><b>the government's building apartments,</b><b>things like that, to put people up in</b><b>and get them out of those</b><b>like shacks and things like that.</b><b>It's an eyesore. It's tough</b><b>to see the people living there.</b><b>So they've been really combating that.</b><b>I think they've more or</b><b>less been pretty successful.</b><b>That's great. So what is</b><b>the government system there?</b><b>Is it like here where you vote for a leader</b><b>every four years or how does it compare?</b><b>It's it's a monarchy.</b><b>So it's the royal family.</b><b>They have a king. OK.</b><b>After the king, his son becomes king. OK.</b><b>After him, his son becomes king.</b><b>And they're running the</b><b>show. They're running everything.</b><b>Yeah, there's elected officials that run</b><b>different parts of the government.</b><b>But at the end of the day, the king is the</b><b>the ruler, the leader,</b><b>and he can influence or change or make</b><b>anything that he wants</b><b>to do as he sees fit.</b><b>So it's not like in Britain where the</b><b>monarchy is more kind of at this point,</b><b>like for tourism or anything else, but they</b><b>have a totally system,</b><b>totally different system</b><b>running the show in Morocco.</b><b>It's not it's not a</b><b>democracy. Right. Right.</b><b>So is there a lot of</b><b>corruption, do you think?</b><b>There's definitely a lot of corruption.</b><b>Yeah, there's a lot of corruption.</b><b>And it's it's interesting because a lot of</b><b>the corruption that you see</b><b>is within the elected officials.</b><b>So they get elected and then they lean</b><b>towards corruption,</b><b>which is very interesting.</b><b>From the king side, I don't</b><b>think there has been much corruption</b><b>or anything that the people have been</b><b>necessarily upset about.</b><b>It's very, very interesting</b><b>to see the love and respect</b><b>that he gets as a ruler that wasn't chosen</b><b>and is just he's going to be the ruler</b><b>until he passes away.</b><b>And so people revere the family. Yes.</b><b>And and I'm sure that that family has</b><b>created a lot of pride from Iraq.</b><b>Yes, very much so, especially this.</b><b>I don't want to say new king because he was</b><b>the king when I was born,</b><b>probably became king in 98 or maybe</b><b>somewhere around there.</b><b>But he has been a very</b><b>big proponent of kind</b><b>of similar what the rest of the world's</b><b>dealing with globalization,</b><b>bringing in foreign companies, bringing in</b><b>like expanding Morocco across Africa</b><b>and just making the economy thrive more,</b><b>bringing in more options for companies,</b><b>jobs, whatever it is, and growing the</b><b>countries from an economic standpoint.</b><b>And I think you see that now where it's</b><b>flourished, where Morocco is</b><b>number one country in Africa, pretty much</b><b>everything runs through Morocco.</b><b>Wow. I would say, yeah.</b><b>And it's definitely a reason</b><b>for that is the Arab Spring</b><b>and all of the stuff that happened with all</b><b>of those governments being overthrown.</b><b>That never happened in Morocco.</b><b>The king stayed, never</b><b>really had any big issues.</b><b>But yeah. So what are the industries?</b><b>But what would you say the</b><b>main industries are in Morocco?</b><b>I wouldn't be able to</b><b>speak about that much.</b><b>Honestly, I'd probably be guessing I know</b><b>tourism is probably top three.</b><b>I would say. Yeah.</b><b>But other than that, not</b><b>not really too familiar.</b><b>What is the main food?</b><b>Main food, are we a</b><b>lot of different things?</b><b>I mean, lamb is big over there.</b><b>Cow, so like steak,</b><b>ground beef, all that stuff.</b><b>Chicken, fish, a lot of fish.</b><b>And we have our traditional dishes, right?</b><b>Like tagine is a very popular.</b><b>If you go there, definitely try it.</b><b>It's a variation of meats, right?</b><b>It's the tagine is the</b><b>mechanism it's cooked in.</b><b>So it's kind of like a clay slow cooker</b><b>that you put over a fire.</b><b>And then inside of it, you put any type of</b><b>veggies with a protein.</b><b>So like a very common one, they'll put like</b><b>a lamb shank in there</b><b>with like apricots.</b><b>That sounds like so good. Yeah.</b><b>It's like a sweet sauce.</b><b>That's big chicken and</b><b>potatoes in the tagine.</b><b>That's big.</b><b>And then they have a lot</b><b>of other traditional stuff.</b><b>Bastilla, that's a big one.</b><b>It's like a little pastry that they will</b><b>stuff either with seafood</b><b>or chicken and almonds.</b><b>Sweeter one.</b><b>Couscous every Friday.</b><b>That's a tradition. Why on Friday?</b><b>I should know, but I don't.</b><b>So every Friday, every Friday,</b><b>you can get couscous everywhere.</b><b>Or it's made in the</b><b>home to made in the home.</b><b>But restaurants have it on the menu and</b><b>they only serve it on Friday.</b><b>Really? Yeah.</b><b>That is so interesting.</b><b>What about a dessert?</b><b>Is there a certain</b><b>dessert that's from that area?</b><b>Like I know for me,</b><b>being Armenian, it's baklava.</b><b>Like that's one of them.</b><b>But see, we are more Middle</b><b>Eastern like pilaf and hummus.</b><b>But I don't is Morocco</b><b>lean that way at all?</b><b>Not as much now.</b><b>And I think that's a common misconception.</b><b>Yeah, because I would</b><b>have had that misconception.</b><b>Yeah. OK. You can get that.</b><b>A lot of places in Morocco, very common.</b><b>People eat it a lot, but</b><b>it's not the traditional,</b><b>traditional food.</b><b>That is so interesting.</b><b>From a dessert standpoint, I don't know.</b><b>We have these little pastries.</b><b>Everything's honey based.</b><b>Really, really good.</b><b>But it's interesting. I can</b><b>Morocco when you say dessert,</b><b>desserts coming out, they're</b><b>bringing out a plate of fruit.</b><b>Oh, OK. So my entire life after the meal,</b><b>we bring out bananas, apples,</b><b>oranges, like cut out watermelon,</b><b>depending on the fruit,</b><b>bananas, apples not cut up.</b><b>Watermelon is cut up.</b><b>Candelope, all types of melons.</b><b>And just depending on what's in season,</b><b>it's not like here where,</b><b>of course, we have seasons for fruits here,</b><b>but you can get the fruit</b><b>any time of year you want</b><b>it more or less over there.</b><b>It's very segmented by season.</b><b>So like summer, you're</b><b>eating watermelon, et cetera.</b><b>OK. Is most of the fruit</b><b>grown in Morocco that you know?</b><b>OK. Yeah.</b><b>Is there a particular drink that's tea?</b><b>See, like a Moroccan tea, mint based.</b><b>But he's huge.</b><b>Like you go to someone's</b><b>house, they're making tea.</b><b>So almost like a</b><b>British vibe in a way kind of.</b><b>And it's a little different.</b><b>It's a little different.</b><b>I know. Yeah.</b><b>Moroccan tea. It's it's our tea.</b><b>It's different. It's</b><b>the Moroccan specialty.</b><b>Does it have caffeine or</b><b>is it more of an herbal tea?</b><b>OK, that definitely does.</b><b>And coffee, coffee is huge.</b><b>And I'm sure Moroccan coffee is amazing.</b><b>Very good. Yeah. Yeah. Very good.</b><b>And it's it's interesting because.</b><b>You'll have dinner at nine p.m.</b><b>And they'll bring out coffee afterwards.</b><b>It's very, very interesting.</b><b>And then are you up then?</b><b>Like now it doesn't affect you.</b><b>No, like when. Perfect.</b><b>When our friends, when</b><b>like me, Ben, Mack, Jesus,</b><b>shout out to all the guys</b><b>all came to Morocco with me.</b><b>They were like, what are we doing?</b><b>Like we'd have dinner at nine.</b><b>We're drinking coffee at 10 p.m.</b><b>And my entire family,</b><b>there's like 40 people in the room.</b><b>We're all drinking coffee. Wow.</b><b>They're all confused.</b><b>Like, what is this?</b><b>And then afterwards, like, all</b><b>right, guys, we're going to bed.</b><b>Doesn't it doesn't.</b><b>Well, probably it's</b><b>such a part of the culture.</b><b>Their bodies are used to it.</b><b>I don't have the right.</b><b>So then if dinner is later,</b><b>then is everyone kind of</b><b>sleeping in and breakfast is later?</b><b>Are people up at an early time still even</b><b>if they're going to bed later?</b><b>People are up at an early time.</b><b>I would say similar things.</b><b>Work starts to eight. OK.</b><b>I'm very similar. But yeah,</b><b>me in town, my friends in town, right.</b><b>So everything was slightly delayed.</b><b>We were just getting together and joining</b><b>our. Yeah. Yeah. Relaxing.</b><b>Exactly. So is the culture among Moroccans?</b><b>Do they try to marry other Moroccans?</b><b>Is it kind of looked down</b><b>upon to not marry Moroccan?</b><b>It depends who you ask.</b><b>OK, it's not looked down upon.</b><b>I don't think by any means.</b><b>But. Your mom and your</b><b>dad want you to bring them.</b><b>OK, my mom says that to me all the time.</b><b>Like, where do you think I'm</b><b>going to meet Moroccan women?</b><b>Yeah. Yeah.</b><b>It's not a Moroccan stop where I can go.</b><b>All right. Here's a</b><b>bunch of great Moroccan women</b><b>that I can introduce</b><b>myself to and get to know.</b><b>But it's it definitely is.</b><b>And especially you got to</b><b>understand it from the perspective</b><b>that it's a communication thing.</b><b>Like my brother is</b><b>married to an American woman.</b><b>Her family is half white, Caucasian,</b><b>American and half from Guyana.</b><b>So she knows my mom, my family very well.</b><b>She's the mother of my nephew.</b><b>But. It's a communication</b><b>barrier when she goes over there.</b><b>My mom, it's easier over text</b><b>because my mom can translate,</b><b>send back a text in Arabic.</b><b>She'll translate, send</b><b>back a text in English.</b><b>Yeah. But it's a communication thing.</b><b>Yeah, that makes sense.</b><b>That makes a lot of sense.</b><b>OK, so your parents move over to Florida</b><b>and you're a baby, right?</b><b>What one, two? Yeah.</b><b>And just them, they didn't</b><b>know anyone in St. Petersburg.</b><b>They had some friends in St. Petersburg,</b><b>but I don't know if they met them there.</b><b>They had a couple of Moroccan</b><b>friends or if they just happened</b><b>to come around the same time.</b><b>How did do you know how your family reacted</b><b>to them leaving like their parents?</b><b>It's a great question.</b><b>I honestly have no idea.</b><b>Yeah, I'm wondering if it</b><b>was a big deal at the time.</b><b>I probably was.</b><b>Because if everyone</b><b>else is still there, even.</b><b>Yeah, that would have been such a break.</b><b>Like what courage on their part to kind of</b><b>break away and go on this adventure</b><b>and leave all this family, all this</b><b>tradition, all this</b><b>culture to move to America.</b><b>Do you know if there was a certain</b><b>motivation in that or was it really</b><b>just wanting to have that</b><b>experience of living over here?</b><b>I'm honestly not entirely sure.</b><b>I'd imagine there was</b><b>some sort of motivation.</b><b>I mean, you can make a lot more money here.</b><b>That's for sure.</b><b>You can set your family</b><b>up for a lot better life.</b><b>And it's not too difficult to</b><b>come here and make normal money</b><b>and be able to support people in Morocco</b><b>because everything's a lot cheaper.</b><b>So that may have played a factor into it.</b><b>It may have just been</b><b>looking for a better education or.</b><b>A better life for their kids, not to say</b><b>that life in Morocco is tough</b><b>or difficult from where</b><b>they were at in their lives.</b><b>But yeah, honestly, I'm not sure.</b><b>These are all just thoughts that I would</b><b>think if I was in their position,</b><b>things that I would look at as positives.</b><b>And then did your dad get a</b><b>job as soon as he got over here?</b><b>He owned a business. Yeah.</b><b>What was his business?</b><b>He owned a gas station food spot.</b><b>Oh, nice. Very typical.</b><b>No, but that's lucrative.</b><b>It is very lucrative.</b><b>Was your mom a stay at home mom? Yes.</b><b>And so she raised your</b><b>brother and you in St.</b><b>Petersburg and your</b><b>dad had the gas station.</b><b>Yes. So she worked at my</b><b>dad's restaurant in Morocco</b><b>when my brother was a baby.</b><b>So my dad owned in their neighborhood.</b><b>He owned the restaurant and</b><b>then he owned a convenience store</b><b>like a corner store.</b><b>So he's an entrepreneur.</b><b>Yeah, he's always been an entrepreneur.</b><b>OK, so when he got out</b><b>of the school for finance,</b><b>did he go right into starting a business?</b><b>He was he was at the bank. Right.</b><b>And then from there, did he</b><b>open his first business? Yes.</b><b>In Morocco. Yeah. OK.</b><b>Open businesses with friends, family.</b><b>And it started off as the restaurant.</b><b>That was something that he did</b><b>throughout his time in Morocco,</b><b>even when we went back restaurant business.</b><b>At certain points, he had multiple.</b><b>And then my mom would</b><b>work in the restaurant.</b><b>She worked in the convenience store, kind</b><b>of just wherever she she seemed.</b><b>She saw fit and she was</b><b>raising my brother at that time.</b><b>And then when I was born, that was it.</b><b>She was just a stay at home mom.</b><b>So I think I know one of the reasons that</b><b>your parents moved to your dad</b><b>has an entrepreneurial spirit.</b><b>I didn't say entrepreneurial spirit.</b><b>America, right? Yep.</b><b>Like this is where if you have especially</b><b>for that spirit, it's</b><b>going to flourish here.</b><b>Yeah. So I bet that had</b><b>something to do with it.</b><b>He's like, I can do this here.</b><b>I can probably make even more</b><b>money over in America doing this</b><b>because he had that talent. Yeah.</b><b>That natural talent.</b><b>If I would guess, I would</b><b>say so. Yeah, that makes sense.</b><b>You're giving me a lot of great questions.</b><b>I know this is awesome.</b><b>Because a lot of these things you don't ask</b><b>your parents growing up.</b><b>Yeah. And then you're like,</b><b>I've never thought about this.</b><b>When you ask them, record it.</b><b>OK. Yeah, that's my advice.</b><b>I do have a question before we go too far.</b><b>Is there a Moroccan community here?</b><b>And then the more importantly, are there</b><b>any good Moroccan restaurants in the area?</b><b>There is an incredible Moroccan restaurant</b><b>right down the street</b><b>for me in Morocco called Zuri.</b><b>If you're ever in Miami, Miami, Miami.</b><b>Sorry. In Miami.</b><b>If you're ever down</b><b>there, highly recommend it.</b><b>Some French guy came over here from France</b><b>and opened their from Morocco</b><b>and opened it.</b><b>Moroccan community in Florida.</b><b>I'm not too sure you go to Boston where I</b><b>lived for a little bit.</b><b>Yeah. Yeah. Plenty of Morocco. OK.</b><b>New York. Same thing.</b><b>I'm sure we're everywhere.</b><b>Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.</b><b>Have you met anyone in South</b><b>Florida that's Moroccan? Yeah.</b><b>Our friend, Sarain, me and</b><b>Nathan's friend, he's Moroccan.</b><b>OK. OK. I met some Moroccan people, Miami.</b><b>Any ladies?</b><b>No, no. Not that you know of.</b><b>Right. I know. It's so hard in Miami</b><b>because you're like, you can't be like,</b><b>oh, you look Moroccan</b><b>because you're not sure. Right.</b><b>I can see someone and</b><b>tell them, oh, you can.</b><b>And very, very funny. And it's very easy.</b><b>Like I can see last time this happened to</b><b>me, a waiter was just walking by my table</b><b>and I called him over and I</b><b>go, you're Moroccan. Yes, I am.</b><b>It's I don't know what</b><b>it is. It's very easy.</b><b>That's so interesting.</b><b>And my brother is the same</b><b>way. My cousins are the same way.</b><b>They'll see someone</b><b>out. They won't even speak.</b><b>And they're like, you're</b><b>Moroccan. Wow. That's fine.</b><b>It's like a little special talent you have.</b><b>They're like a superpower</b><b>Moroccan super. I guess so.</b><b>I guess so. You're like,</b><b>you're one of us. Yeah, I can tell.</b><b>So how long did they</b><b>live in St. Petersburg?</b><b>About eight years.</b><b>OK, so you preschool kindergarten,</b><b>kindergarten, first grade.</b><b>I left in first grade 2006.</b><b>And so you were speaking</b><b>English, I assume, and French.</b><b>No French. So your mom</b><b>didn't keep it going at home.</b><b>No, my mom spoke to me in Arabic, Arabic.</b><b>So you knew Arabic and English.</b><b>And did you guys attend?</b><b>What it wouldn't be church, I'd be a</b><b>mosque, a mosque in St. Petersburg.</b><b>We did. Yes. So you were</b><b>able to I'm sure speak Arabic.</b><b>That's where you would speak Arabic to</b><b>raise your culture was still maintained.</b><b>Yeah. So it's interesting because the</b><b>Moroccans, we speak the region,</b><b>which is our Moroccan dialect. Mm hmm.</b><b>Very hard to understand a</b><b>lot of other Arab countries.</b><b>And it's it's funny</b><b>because you go Morocco, Algeria.</b><b>They understand us Tunisia.</b><b>They understand us Libya a</b><b>little less, Egypt a little less.</b><b>Each country you get over, it gets more</b><b>towards the Middle East</b><b>and more traditional Arabic. Mm hmm.</b><b>I always get jokes about that.</b><b>They're like, you don't speak Arabic.</b><b>I'm like, well, I can</b><b>read it. So I do speak it.</b><b>But our Arabic is a dialect.</b><b>It's a mix of a lot of Spanish words, a lot</b><b>of French words from</b><b>when we were colonized.</b><b>Interesting. So that's</b><b>what I speak at home.</b><b>That's like if I call my</b><b>brother, that's what we're speaking.</b><b>And what's it called again?</b><b>Dereja Dereja. Yeah. Dereja.</b><b>So it's a form of</b><b>Arabic. Yeah, it's a dialect.</b><b>It's a dialect of Arabic. Yeah.</b><b>And so you're speaking</b><b>Dereja and then French.</b><b>You know, Dereja and French, you know,</b><b>English and, you know, Spanish, don't you?</b><b>A little bit like you can</b><b>get around a little bit.</b><b>Yeah, I can get back. It's amazing.</b><b>It's such a gift that you have</b><b>that you know these languages</b><b>because, you know, most</b><b>Americans don't all because of my mom.</b><b>Yeah. Yeah. She was.</b><b>Well, we'll get into that.</b><b>But she so she kept it</b><b>going when you were over in St.</b><b>Petersburg speaking Dereja in the home,</b><b>attending the mosque.</b><b>Yeah. The culture was</b><b>still there and rich. Yeah.</b><b>Why did they move back to Morocco?</b><b>So one thing I wanted to say, though,</b><b>before that is the mosque</b><b>was to learn how to read</b><b>actual Arabic traditional. OK.</b><b>So what's in the Quran,</b><b>what's in the newspaper?</b><b>All of that. It's not the</b><b>reason it's all traditional Arabic.</b><b>So that was an effort to do that and</b><b>obviously to learn about our religion.</b><b>And then the reason was that.</b><b>And so did you learn how to read and write</b><b>it at that young of an age?</b><b>Not not not great. No, I was trying.</b><b>But it was very difficult.</b><b>And I learned it when I got to Morocco. OK.</b><b>And you were also learning</b><b>English because were you attending</b><b>American school or Muslim school when you</b><b>were in American school, public school,</b><b>public school. Yeah.</b><b>So you're learning English and the American</b><b>culture. Exactly right.</b><b>And then at the same time</b><b>maintaining your Moroccan culture.</b><b>That's excellent. Why did</b><b>they go back to Morocco?</b><b>My mom was going back to visit</b><b>family and on her way out,</b><b>there was some visa issues.</b><b>She overstayed her visa by like a day or a</b><b>week or something like that.</b><b>And they were like in the airport.</b><b>No, get out. No. Yeah.</b><b>So so she got deported pretty much with the</b><b>flight out flight to go home.</b><b>And she didn't know that with the paperwork</b><b>and everything probably right.</b><b>She knew maybe she did.</b><b>I'm pretty sure she did it.</b><b>No, because I don't think she</b><b>would have shown up like that.</b><b>You know what I mean?</b><b>She probably would have done</b><b>something to take care of it</b><b>before going to an airport</b><b>and having everything checked.</b><b>And she was going to</b><b>Morocco pretty consistently.</b><b>Our family was coming to visit.</b><b>I don't think it was ever</b><b>their goal to stay here full time.</b><b>My mom is the biggest patriot ever.</b><b>Like if I ever say anything,</b><b>that's a slight to Morocco.</b><b>Just sit down for 30 minutes</b><b>because you're getting a lecture.</b><b>Yeah. Yeah. Well, was it your mom and dad</b><b>and you and your brother in the airport?</b><b>It was my mom and maybe my aunt.</b><b>I was at home. My brother was</b><b>at home. My dad was at home.</b><b>She was just going home to see some family.</b><b>And your aunt was visiting or lived?</b><b>My I believe it was my</b><b>aunt Malika who lives here.</b><b>So was she living here</b><b>when they moved here?</b><b>And she moved after she moved here with us.</b><b>Oh, so she moved with you.</b><b>She moved here a couple of years after us,</b><b>but she lived with us.</b><b>OK, OK. So the sisters basically were going</b><b>back to Morocco to visit family.</b><b>And that's when your mom</b><b>essentially got deported.</b><b>Oh, my gosh, I can't</b><b>imagine the trauma for her.</b><b>You and your brother are home and she's</b><b>being sent back to Morocco.</b><b>Have you ever spoken to</b><b>her about that situation?</b><b>Yeah, I have.</b><b>She definitely resents the US for that.</b><b>Yeah, it's understandable.</b><b>And I mean, listen, I always say there's</b><b>rules and you got to follow the rules.</b><b>You can't slip up on something like that.</b><b>Right. And that's my mom.</b><b>We're talking about something that</b><b>dramatically changed my life.</b><b>But there's rules in place</b><b>and there's a system in place.</b><b>And you got to follow it, whether it was a</b><b>mistake or an accident.</b><b>Doesn't matter on paper</b><b>because anyone could tell you, oh,</b><b>I overstayed my visa here by a</b><b>year because it was an accident.</b><b>But yeah, it was tough.</b><b>It was a very, very big, big</b><b>pivotal moment in all of our lives.</b><b>And she understandably, from her</b><b>perspective, resented</b><b>the US for it.</b><b>My dad worked here, pay</b><b>taxes, had a green card.</b><b>We went to school.</b><b>We were a good part of</b><b>the community, et cetera.</b><b>But what year was was that 2006?</b><b>OK, so in 2006, you were what six?</b><b>I was eight. Eight.</b><b>So I assume she tells</b><b>your dad I'm being deported.</b><b>And then did he basically</b><b>have to sell his gas station?</b><b>And so basically your life in America</b><b>was completely altered from that moment.</b><b>Your dad had to sell his gas station.</b><b>You guys were pulled from school.</b><b>We're moving back to Morocco.</b><b>So it was in May.</b><b>OK. And end of the school year.</b><b>Right. So my dad's like, we're going to go</b><b>visit family in Morocco.</b><b>So we got over there and we're</b><b>there for a couple of months.</b><b>And then one day my dad's like, we're going</b><b>to go look at the school.</b><b>And I was young. I was</b><b>just happy to be there.</b><b>Yeah. My brother, who's four</b><b>and a half years older than me,</b><b>was like 12 and a half, 13.</b><b>He was just finished sixth grade.</b><b>So he knows what's going on.</b><b>He's like, why am I looking at a school?</b><b>I have a school at home.</b><b>He had friends at home.</b><b>I'm on the football</b><b>team at home, like, etc.</b><b>And I was just excited.</b><b>Like, oh, Morocco, I'm</b><b>Moroccan. I love this.</b><b>And it was just I don't</b><b>remember when they told us,</b><b>but it was a while before we</b><b>found out that we were going back.</b><b>So had he packed up all your</b><b>stuff and sold your house in St.</b><b>Petersburg? And did you guys</b><b>not know all that was going on?</b><b>No. So when we left our all</b><b>of our shit was still there.</b><b>And then like a few months, many months</b><b>into being in Morocco,</b><b>we had a shipping container</b><b>dropped on our front doorstep,</b><b>like a full shipping container with our</b><b>cars, our clothes, our furniture,</b><b>everything. Oh, my God.</b><b>And that was like the point where I was</b><b>like, oh, so much shit in the U.S.</b><b>So I'm probably not going.</b><b>That's pretty wild. Yeah.</b><b>So did all of this happen</b><b>basically during that summer?</b><b>And so by the time</b><b>school started in Morocco,</b><b>you by then did you know, OK, we're staying</b><b>here before school started.</b><b>My mom sat us down. She was like, listen,</b><b>we're not going back.</b><b>So how did your brother react to that?</b><b>He was furious. That's middle school. Yeah.</b><b>No, that's like, yeah,</b><b>that's ruining my life. Yes.</b><b>I don't know if he said that, but he</b><b>probably thought in middle school.</b><b>They say that if you take away, you know,</b><b>if you grab it, yeah, yeah.</b><b>You're ruined. If you take</b><b>away their ice cream sandwich,</b><b>you're ruining their life.</b><b>So I'm sure he was like lost it.</b><b>Yeah, I can only</b><b>imagine what that was like.</b><b>What that's amazing. What an adjustment.</b><b>Now, when you think back on you were young,</b><b>but when you think back on that,</b><b>is it feel fairly traumatic or because</b><b>you're so young, you're like,</b><b>it's just what it was.</b><b>It's just what it was.</b><b>It wasn't really traumatic at all.</b><b>It was a very, very big change</b><b>culturally, people, et cetera.</b><b>But from what I remember from my family</b><b>tells me, I was just happy.</b><b>You were happy to be there</b><b>with my family. We're in Morocco.</b><b>Yeah, this is great.</b><b>But then when I hit like puberty age.</b><b>Middle school beginning of</b><b>high school that completely.</b><b>OK, so you move.</b><b>What's our second grade in Morocco?</b><b>I was supposed to start</b><b>second grade. I got to Morocco.</b><b>I took the test to get into</b><b>school and then they were like,</b><b>you're not second grade level.</b><b>You should be in third grade.</b><b>So I skipped the second. Oh, interesting.</b><b>OK, so you're so third</b><b>grade, but second grade age</b><b>for those elementary</b><b>school formative years.</b><b>Did you did they have sports or anything?</b><b>Did you play like organized</b><b>sports? What did you play?</b><b>I played soccer, basketball, volleyball.</b><b>Yeah, that's it in track and field.</b><b>OK, so I went to when I moved over there, I</b><b>went to an American private school</b><b>and I had 15 kids in my grade.</b><b>And your grade in my entire grade and those</b><b>15 kids I grew up with.</b><b>So every year, plus or</b><b>minus two to five people.</b><b>Those were the kids that were in my grade</b><b>my entire life in Morocco.</b><b>Wow. So with that size of a</b><b>school, we had our own conference</b><b>where we played sports</b><b>against other American schools.</b><b>There was two others in Casablanca, one in</b><b>Rabat, which is the capital.</b><b>One in Marrakesh is a very big city and</b><b>then a couple others across the country.</b><b>That's who we played sports against.</b><b>Were they were they expats or Moroccan</b><b>citizens sending their</b><b>kids to American schools?</b><b>It was everything expats, Moroccan</b><b>citizens, Indians, Russians,</b><b>Italians, literally everything.</b><b>Yeah, anybody that was in Morocco that</b><b>wanted their kids to</b><b>get an American education,</b><b>learn English, being sent</b><b>there was very expensive.</b><b>Yeah, yeah, sure.</b><b>Was it mainly to learn English or did you</b><b>guys actually learn American history</b><b>and stuff about America? Everything.</b><b>Really? Yeah.</b><b>So American history, stuff about America.</b><b>It was very similar to a</b><b>curriculum at a school here.</b><b>Right. Very similar, except we would have</b><b>an hour of French and an hour of Arabic</b><b>every day for throughout</b><b>your whole career in school.</b><b>What about Moroccan history?</b><b>Would you also still learn about Morocco?</b><b>Yeah, stuff like that.</b><b>Sure. That's awesome.</b><b>Yeah. I'm trying to picture, though.</b><b>How did you play organized sports?</b><b>They must have blended ages.</b><b>If you only had 15 in your grades.</b><b>Exactly right. That's</b><b>what I was trying to get at.</b><b>There is I'm not good at basketball.</b><b>I'm decent at volleyball, but I'm I'm</b><b>actually pretty bad at basketball.</b><b>I was on the basketball team.</b><b>There was like 20 kids</b><b>where you had a pulse.</b><b>You can run or get on the team.</b><b>So I played any sport that was open.</b><b>Like the coaches would come up to you and</b><b>be like, we need you on the team.</b><b>So that's why I was on all those teams.</b><b>But and were there girl teams, too? Yeah.</b><b>OK. Yeah. And then at this school, did the</b><b>little girls just stress?</b><b>Was it uniforms? Uniforms. Yeah.</b><b>Like how I picture</b><b>Catholic school uniforms.</b><b>That's right. White collared shirt or a</b><b>light blue collared shirt</b><b>with the school emblem on</b><b>there matching shorts or pants.</b><b>And then a couple of years</b><b>in, they took away the collars</b><b>and gave us the flexibility to be normal</b><b>crewed neck or collared.</b><b>And not religious based.</b><b>I know we didn't learn.</b><b>We didn't really study religion.</b><b>OK. My mom took care of that.</b><b>And then your brother then</b><b>would have been in middle school.</b><b>So it was his grade also</b><b>just as small. Same thing.</b><b>That would have been such a hard</b><b>adjustment as a middle schooler</b><b>coming from an American middle school to</b><b>then having your world get so small.</b><b>Do you know it was at heart?</b><b>I'm sure it was harder</b><b>for him to adjust. Yeah.</b><b>It was it was.</b><b>Probably a big change.</b><b>It was a big change for him,</b><b>but he adapted very well. He's</b><b>he's the best, most outgoing, social, nice.</b><b>Everyone loves him. All</b><b>his teachers loved him.</b><b>All his friends loved</b><b>him. So he just fit right in.</b><b>And he played sports, too, I assume. Yeah.</b><b>He was so he's not that that big.</b><b>He's pretty short.</b><b>But he my entire life, he was incredible</b><b>all sports like soccer to this day.</b><b>Incredible basketball</b><b>by Moroccan standards.</b><b>He's pretty damn good volleyball as well.</b><b>So yeah, he fit in pretty well.</b><b>So you guys are humming along in Morocco.</b><b>Your dad opened up another</b><b>business, I assume. Right.</b><b>Was it a restaurant?</b><b>So he opened up a restaurant.</b><b>He opened up one restaurant and then the</b><b>second and then the third.</b><b>And he would like have</b><b>one or two open at a time.</b><b>He usually would like sell them and kind of</b><b>build up the brand, sell it and do that.</b><b>And then his other</b><b>business was he would go to China</b><b>and buy he had a company that</b><b>he did this with his company,</b><b>but he would buy like</b><b>everything you need to finish a house.</b><b>So doors, door frames, showers, tubs,</b><b>windows, everything. Right.</b><b>And he would buy them in</b><b>China and ship them to Morocco</b><b>and sell them to people</b><b>building houses in Morocco.</b><b>He's a hustler. Yes. Wow. Yes. Yeah.</b><b>Because he's running these businesses.</b><b>And then I wonder where he got that idea.</b><b>Just OK, I'm going to go to China and</b><b>wholesale all this stuff.</b><b>Yeah, I think they write. He would he would</b><b>sell anything like he would bring</b><b>hummers, escalades on the gold wings.</b><b>Any car that wasn't available in Morocco,</b><b>like you would bring an escalate.</b><b>Let's say it's $40,000 here and sell it in</b><b>Morocco for like$65,000.</b><b>Wow. Like no one else can get it.</b><b>You had like the first</b><b>escalate there, first hummer there.</b><b>And he would just be like,</b><b>all right, people want this.</b><b>This will sell. I'll go get it and sell it.</b><b>So he's not just an</b><b>entrepreneur, but a salesman.</b><b>Yeah. But he's all sounds like he's</b><b>probably fairly well connected.</b><b>Yeah. Right. Because you probably can't do</b><b>that in Morocco without connections.</b><b>Yeah. Yeah. Very much so.</b><b>Yeah. So your family, I assume, have been</b><b>considered wealthy in Morocco.</b><b>In Morocco. Yeah.</b><b>And how does your dad</b><b>adjust to being back in Morocco?</b><b>Obviously, fine business wise.</b><b>But was he OK with coming back to Morocco?</b><b>I'm not sure. I never noticed anything.</b><b>But I can't imagine that he</b><b>was I mean, I'm sure he was upset</b><b>with all the progress he made here in the</b><b>US and having to go back.</b><b>But can't imagine it was</b><b>too big of a change for him.</b><b>I mean, he was probably in</b><b>his 40s at that point in time.</b><b>His whole life, other than maybe like six</b><b>to eight years was in Morocco.</b><b>So and I'm sure your family was thrilled.</b><b>Yeah. And their parents and all that,</b><b>because then they have you guys there, too,</b><b>which is wonderful. So</b><b>how long were you in Morocco</b><b>until you came back to the US?</b><b>I was in Morocco from 2006 to 2014.</b><b>So eight years, eight years.</b><b>So you would have been.</b><b>Fourteen going on 15.</b><b>So right before high school.</b><b>So just finished sophomore year of high</b><b>school, going into junior year.</b><b>Oh, well. Right.</b><b>Because you skipped a grade.</b><b>Yeah. OK, so your and your brother would</b><b>have been going to college.</b><b>Yeah, my brother came here for college.</b><b>He graduated the school in Morocco, the</b><b>American school, and then came over here</b><b>back to St Pete, went to college there.</b><b>And that's when everything flipped for me</b><b>because I was just like,</b><b>I don't want to be here. Why my Morocco?</b><b>I should be in the US. I want to move back.</b><b>Morocco sucks. I don't</b><b>like it here, et cetera.</b><b>Just going through puberty.</b><b>Well, and also probably you felt you</b><b>outgrown that space in a way,</b><b>especially if you're</b><b>with those same kids still.</b><b>Yeah, I'm sure it's</b><b>hard to date after a while.</b><b>Yeah. Yeah.</b><b>So and just it</b><b>everything gets so incestuous.</b><b>You're just like, I need</b><b>change. I need to get out of here.</b><b>And my brother left.</b><b>That's what I was about. Your brother left.</b><b>He's like, you guys are you guys are</b><b>obviously boys, I think.</b><b>Right. You guys are tight. Yeah.</b><b>Very much so. Yeah.</b><b>It was always me and</b><b>him, me and him, my cousins.</b><b>And when he left, I was</b><b>just like, why am I still here?</b><b>Yeah. So then what happened?</b><b>What what made the move back</b><b>to America? What was the shift?</b><b>So my parents always</b><b>knew that I was going to go.</b><b>Me and my parents always knew that I was</b><b>going to go to American College</b><b>or university and no one was going to pay</b><b>for an international tuition.</b><b>So the plan was always</b><b>to get back to the US.</b><b>I'm an American citizen.</b><b>I need a year or two</b><b>to get in state tuition.</b><b>So it was always sophomore or junior year.</b><b>I would go back. I was supposed to go come</b><b>back here my sophomore year.</b><b>And my mom pulls me aside like going into</b><b>that summer and she's like,</b><b>this is really sad, but she's</b><b>like, I just can't lose it yet.</b><b>Like you can't go over there</b><b>and leave me. I need you to stay.</b><b>So me being the punk little kid I am just</b><b>held that over her head</b><b>and threw a fit for an entire year until my</b><b>going into my summer of my junior year.</b><b>I was like, I'm I'm fucking leaving.</b><b>I don't want to be here any longer.</b><b>And she tells me those stories and I just</b><b>get sad because I'm like,</b><b>I was such a little shit.</b><b>And now I would give everything to just be</b><b>with her next to her.</b><b>But it's the age, though.</b><b>And it really is. It is. It is.</b><b>It's kind of the job,</b><b>especially I think of young men.</b><b>They want you want that autonomy.</b><b>You're trying. It's part</b><b>of your job to become a man.</b><b>So anybody who's going to stop you, whether</b><b>it's your mom or whether it's the neighbor,</b><b>you know, God help them.</b><b>So but how could you come back here?</b><b>Did you come back on your own?</b><b>I came back on my own.</b><b>My aunt was still here,</b><b>so my aunt never left.</b><b>OK. And my aunt's my mom's sister.</b><b>So on my mom's side,</b><b>she's my aunt and my mom.</b><b>They grew up together. Yeah, she knew.</b><b>So she felt very comfortable</b><b>sending me to live with her in St.</b><b>Petersburg as well.</b><b>She was actually right down</b><b>the street from my brother.</b><b>So it worked out perfectly.</b><b>She was also raising a</b><b>kid, my cousin, who's 22 now.</b><b>So a few years younger than me.</b><b>So just hey, you're</b><b>already raising a kid. Yeah.</b><b>Would you mind helping out with this guy</b><b>until he goes to college?</b><b>Yeah. How did your brother come over here?</b><b>Because you said about</b><b>the international tuition.</b><b>Was it did he not have to pay the</b><b>international tuition at first? Yeah.</b><b>So he has a green card.</b><b>Now he has a passport. He's a citizen now.</b><b>But he came over here first year, just paid</b><b>international tuition.</b><b>He went to a community college and then he</b><b>worked here, got a job</b><b>and then eventually became</b><b>in state a year or two. OK.</b><b>So even with international after a year or</b><b>so, you can pay in state tuition.</b><b>Yeah. Oh, that's great.</b><b>It's not just domestically or</b><b>internationally as well.</b><b>So you finished high school.</b><b>Did you go to the high</b><b>school that you would have gone to</b><b>if you stayed in St. Petersburg?</b><b>Yeah. Public high school. The</b><b>same one. The same one. Yeah.</b><b>Did you know any remember</b><b>any kids from first grade? No.</b><b>So how was it starting</b><b>school as a junior? It was insane.</b><b>It was and I went from the</b><b>same 15 kids that I knew.</b><b>I knew everything about</b><b>them. I knew their parents.</b><b>I knew where they</b><b>lived. I knew their habits.</b><b>I knew everything to a school where the</b><b>graduating class was 450 kids.</b><b>Yeah, the graduating. Yeah. Yeah.</b><b>And it was just mayhem, seeing how kids</b><b>like were behaving, acting,</b><b>just partying, doing whatever they want.</b><b>It was it was a shock for sure. I bet.</b><b>And just did you get</b><b>involved with sports? Yeah.</b><b>Yeah, I was a captain of the soccer team.</b><b>OK, well, look at you</b><b>sliding right in. Right.</b><b>Well, it's not the sport here, right?</b><b>So all the best athletes play</b><b>football and basketball. Right.</b><b>In Morocco, it's the opposite.</b><b>All the best athletes play soccer.</b><b>So I was middle, upper</b><b>middle of the pack in Morocco.</b><b>And when I came here,</b><b>I was top of the pack.</b><b>Yeah, because people</b><b>don't focus as much on soccer.</b><b>So it was a little bit of an</b><b>easy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.</b><b>Now, did you have a car? You got a license</b><b>here. I got a license.</b><b>I didn't have a car.</b><b>So you weren't you</b><b>weren't out on the streets yet.</b><b>No, I haven't around</b><b>or anything. No, I was.</b><b>So I was young for my age, so I didn't get</b><b>my license until I was 16.</b><b>Or yeah. And of my end of being 16. Right.</b><b>So OK, I got here when I was 15 and then I</b><b>figured out that to get it at 16,</b><b>you had to have your learner's permit.</b><b>So when I turned 16, I</b><b>got my learner's permit. OK.</b><b>So then close to 17, 17, I got my license.</b><b>The day of my senior year prompt.</b><b>Oh, you got your license that day that day.</b><b>And I drove my dad had moved</b><b>there like four months ago,</b><b>four months before that before. Yeah.</b><b>And I drove his car and then I would drive</b><b>my brother's car around.</b><b>I had a little scooter</b><b>that I would take to school.</b><b>But no, I didn't own a car.</b><b>So when you moved here, did did the</b><b>skipping and grade hold?</b><b>So you were always younger</b><b>than everyone in your grade.</b><b>And in America, that can make a difference.</b><b>Yeah. Like, did you ever feel younger?</b><b>Yeah, definitely.</b><b>Like when I got to Florida State, the first</b><b>four months of me being</b><b>by myself living in</b><b>Florida State, I was 17.</b><b>Yeah, that's pretty young. Yeah. Yeah.</b><b>That's very young. Yeah. Yeah.</b><b>OK, so so well, to go</b><b>back, you said your dad moved</b><b>to America four months</b><b>before your senior prom.</b><b>What prompted him to make that move?</b><b>He just had some stuff going on in Morocco</b><b>and then him and my</b><b>mom kind of parted ways.</b><b>And I think he just didn't</b><b>have anything else to do there.</b><b>So he just came back over here.</b><b>Did they get divorced? No.</b><b>So they're still married.</b><b>They're separated. Yeah.</b><b>So she stayed in Morocco and</b><b>he moved to St. Peter's Park.</b><b>And then were you essentially did he move</b><b>with your aunt or did he get his own place?</b><b>He moved in with my aunt for probably two</b><b>weeks while he found a spot.</b><b>And then I moved in with him.</b><b>And then you moved in with him.</b><b>So that was that the first time you had</b><b>seen him since you had moved to America?</b><b>No, I would go back there in</b><b>the summer. OK. Yeah. All right.</b><b>So you still were seeing that.</b><b>But it's probably nice to have your dad</b><b>over here in America. Right.</b><b>And it was very interesting, interesting</b><b>dynamic because it was</b><b>the traditional family style.</b><b>Right. I'm at home with my mom.</b><b>My mom knows every single</b><b>detail and aspect of my life.</b><b>And in my dad's at work all</b><b>day, he comes home at night.</b><b>I saw him. How's your day?</b><b>What's how sports? Let's</b><b>watch the soccer game, et cetera.</b><b>And then going from that to him being in</b><b>every detail in my life, I was like,</b><b>this is really weird. Yeah.</b><b>Change your guys's relationship.</b><b>Right. So yeah. And</b><b>she became a lot closer.</b><b>So you graduate and was Florida State</b><b>always your number one?</b><b>Florida State was my number one.</b><b>Yeah. So I applied for early</b><b>admission to Florida State.</b><b>I was in the middle of or</b><b>applying to the rest of the schools</b><b>I wanted to go to.</b><b>I got into Florida State early admission in</b><b>October and I didn't apply anywhere else.</b><b>OK, that was it. That was it.</b><b>It was was Florida State, your target, even</b><b>in Morocco or with this?</b><b>No, it was just when</b><b>you when I got here. Yeah.</b><b>I didn't really know much about Florida</b><b>State when I was in Morocco.</b><b>Yeah, that would make sense.</b><b>So you did the summer sea?</b><b>No, I went in fall. Oh, you did fall. Yeah.</b><b>OK, so when you started in the fall, then</b><b>had you spent any time in Tally?</b><b>No, Hasey. No, it was funny.</b><b>My brother drove me up for orientation</b><b>and he dropped me off on</b><b>the side of the street.</b><b>He goes, have fun, kid</b><b>drives back home with his buddies,</b><b>but he came up with us so he wouldn't drive</b><b>back alone. And that's it.</b><b>My dad never came up to Tallahassee.</b><b>Really? My brother came</b><b>up one time after that.</b><b>It was literally just</b><b>me. They're like, go. Wow.</b><b>Wow. Yeah. So you're</b><b>in the dorms, I assume.</b><b>No, I had an</b><b>apartment. You had an apartment.</b><b>But you were at FSU. I was</b><b>at FSU. I was an FSU student.</b><b>But you didn't. Did you not</b><b>want to live in the dorms?</b><b>I thought you had to as a</b><b>freshman. You didn't know.</b><b>Oh, OK. What made you make that decision?</b><b>Cost comparison versus</b><b>compared to what I was getting.</b><b>OK, apartment was</b><b>cheaper and I had my own room.</b><b>I had my friend from St.</b><b>Petersburg that I was moving up with and he</b><b>didn't get into Florida State.</b><b>He was in TCC.</b><b>And we wanted to live together, right?</b><b>And so I was like, dad, is</b><b>it cool if I get an apartment?</b><b>He's like, yeah, that's perfect.</b><b>So and just to go back, you were only 17.</b><b>I was only 17. That's pretty wild.</b><b>Yeah, 17 living in an apartment.</b><b>You had never lived on your</b><b>own before like that, right?</b><b>Paying bills, taking care of all that stuff</b><b>away from your still your mom.</b><b>Yeah. And I would say the</b><b>experience of moving here</b><b>and just living with my</b><b>aunt, my aunt worked a lot</b><b>because she was a single mom</b><b>here raising a kid by herself.</b><b>So I got a lot of that</b><b>experience in junior, senior year</b><b>at high school where I would</b><b>take myself to and from school,</b><b>take myself to and from all my practices.</b><b>Had a job when I was 15, just figuring</b><b>everything out. Right.</b><b>Well, what's your job?</b><b>My first job was a cabana boy at the</b><b>Serrata Beach Resort in St. Petersburg.</b><b>Nice. So I would set up these cabanas for</b><b>people that are staying at the hotel.</b><b>Get in at like 6 a.m., have</b><b>everything set up by that time.</b><b>And then they needed a drink or anything.</b><b>I'd get the waiter, et cetera.</b><b>I was just kind of the the</b><b>helper boy at the area. Yeah.</b><b>And then same hotel around six months in.</b><b>I got brought into their restaurant.</b><b>I was a food runner and</b><b>then I became a bar back.</b><b>And yeah, that's the job I had.</b><b>That was through high school.</b><b>Through high school. Yeah.</b><b>And then I assume also</b><b>living with your aunt,</b><b>were you making a lot of</b><b>your own meals, breakfast?</b><b>No. So your meals were still made for you.</b><b>She had that down. OK. OK.</b><b>So at Tallahassee, that was your first time</b><b>managing your food on your own.</b><b>Grocery shopping. Yeah. All that. And I</b><b>know you like to cook. I do.</b><b>Now, had you always liked to cook or did</b><b>that come in Tallahassee</b><b>when you were on your own?</b><b>I didn't always like to cook,</b><b>but I always watch my mom cook.</b><b>My mom is 10 out of 10.</b><b>Incredible chef, just like you are.</b><b>And she I would always watch</b><b>her make stuff. Right. Yeah.</b><b>And I don't know if I learned necessarily</b><b>watching her, but I got a feel for it.</b><b>And then I would just call her.</b><b>I'm like, hey, I want to make this.</b><b>And she would just</b><b>send me a voice recording.</b><b>Here's what you do. Here's how you do it.</b><b>Here's how long.</b><b>And that's just kind of how I got into it.</b><b>And then, yeah, I</b><b>figured out that it's easy.</b><b>It is really not that hard.</b><b>It's not act like it's very</b><b>difficult. It's very easy.</b><b>Yeah, there's levels to it, of course.</b><b>But it really it's</b><b>it's it's what's the same.</b><b>There's this tick tock for he always says</b><b>it isn't easy, but it is simple.</b><b>And I think with cooking, you know, once</b><b>you get if you can follow a recipe,</b><b>it is simple. And once you get the hang of</b><b>things, it does become easy.</b><b>But at first, it can feel intimidating</b><b>where this is too hard.</b><b>It's too much. It's but but if you really</b><b>think about it, it is simple.</b><b>It's just following steps.</b><b>Exactly. It's just measuring and following.</b><b>I have a question there.</b><b>Yeah, she measures. Do you measure?</b><b>Are you OK?</b><b>I'm not a measure.</b><b>I'm not a measure. I ball totally.</b><b>I can't all eyeball things like olive oil</b><b>or stuff, but I can't with season.</b><b>I'm too nervous. I'm going to ruin the</b><b>whole dish by putting</b><b>too much of something.</b><b>Yeah, no, I just saw my eyeballer.</b><b>I'm an eyeballer. That's funny, because</b><b>when I lived with Nate,</b><b>I was trying to like show him a couple of</b><b>things on how to do things.</b><b>And he's like, well, how do you know how</b><b>much of this to put in there?</b><b>I'm like, just guess.</b><b>So it's made with love.</b><b>Yeah, I say like it's just</b><b>this much love and that much love.</b><b>Exactly. But I measure my love because I</b><b>especially with salt.</b><b>I'm always so nervous.</b><b>I'm an over salt something.</b><b>So OK, so Tallahassee was where</b><b>your love of cooking was born.</b><b>Really? Yeah. You know, I mean, you had</b><b>been observing your mom</b><b>and through osmosis</b><b>absorbing the the vibe of cooking.</b><b>Because even if it is simple or easy, you</b><b>still there's still</b><b>something about cooking.</b><b>There has to be an emotion tied to it, I</b><b>think like you are an intention</b><b>when you're making it. And I</b><b>think that's what makes it.</b><b>Whatever dish you're making makes it good</b><b>because there's that enjoyment</b><b>while you're doing it. You</b><b>know, I mean, not always.</b><b>I have a whole short that went viral about</b><b>complaining about</b><b>making dinner every night.</b><b>But in general, when you're</b><b>making something, you know,</b><b>and then you see how it</b><b>turns out and all that.</b><b>Well, especially when you're making for</b><b>someone else. Yes. Yeah. Yeah.</b><b>Well, making dinner is different than</b><b>making a meal. Right.</b><b>Making dinner can be mac and</b><b>cheese, maybe mashed potatoes.</b><b>Those are sides. But when you jump into</b><b>like one of your Armenian dishes</b><b>and you've got the pilaf and the dolma and</b><b>the hummus and that's a meal.</b><b>I made meals for 30 years.</b><b>And then I had a lot of them. They've all</b><b>been really good. Thank you.</b><b>And then I did hit a point</b><b>where I was like, you know what?</b><b>I need a break from</b><b>this. I don't want to make.</b><b>I was cooking Sunday through Thursday.</b><b>And I just was like, I</b><b>don't want to do that anymore.</b><b>But I mean, I'm 54. So</b><b>it was time to also cook.</b><b>But I like to have the freedom</b><b>to say I'm not cooking tonight.</b><b>Where for 30 years I didn't have I put that</b><b>on myself like making for the family.</b><b>No one made me.</b><b>But I gave myself the permission to say</b><b>we're doing takeout tonight.</b><b>And I never had before. You know, I was</b><b>like, no, that's only Friday or Saturday.</b><b>But now it's a little more loose.</b><b>But when I do cook now, I really, really</b><b>enjoy it because I</b><b>don't do it as much as I.</b><b>Is that a thing in Morocco like to order</b><b>food in depends on your family?</b><b>My family, not at all. I</b><b>wouldn't think so. No, no. Yeah.</b><b>I could see your mom made everything like</b><b>literally anything you wanted.</b><b>She would make it, whether it was like</b><b>sweets and pastries or meals</b><b>or breakfast, lunch, dinner, everything.</b><b>I never ate school lunch.</b><b>I would take home or I take</b><b>a lunch to school with me.</b><b>And funny story, funny stories.</b><b>I would take home or I</b><b>would take a lunch to school</b><b>and I would get kids to trade</b><b>me two or three school lunches</b><b>in exchange for the lunch I brought.</b><b>That's funny. Yeah.</b><b>Like my friends would come up to me and I</b><b>always had a lunchbox when I was a kid</b><b>and they'd be like, what's in there?</b><b>I'd be like, it's the pasta.</b><b>They're like, no, not the pasta.</b><b>And they would actually like come together,</b><b>get three kids and be like,</b><b>all right, we're all going to give them our</b><b>food and we're going to get his food.</b><b>So you're getting like the American meal</b><b>from their hot lunch.</b><b>And then you guys are</b><b>exchanging cultures almost right.</b><b>Because we're the meals at the American</b><b>school, like probably what kids here</b><b>were getting very similar.</b><b>There was an actual chef, right?</b><b>So it was better food, I</b><b>would say. Right. Right. Right.</b><b>They would be burgers a day.</b><b>Sometimes they would have like just all</b><b>kinds of like food that you'd get.</b><b>Yeah. Lunch here, some</b><b>pizzas, things like that.</b><b>Every once in a while,</b><b>they're throwing something Moroccan.</b><b>So it was a mix. Did your mom know?</b><b>She did. She found it hilarious. Yeah.</b><b>What's your mom's stance on leftovers or is</b><b>it a clean slate the next day?</b><b>No, big leftover family.</b><b>OK, yeah. All right. Perfect.</b><b>Especially like pasta, things</b><b>like that. Big, big leftovers.</b><b>Well, she's probably</b><b>making whatever she's making.</b><b>She's making a lot of it, right? Yeah.</b><b>So there's bound to be leftovers.</b><b>I bet it tastes better the next day.</b><b>It tastes good that first day,</b><b>but like her dolma the next day.</b><b>Oh, my God. Yeah.</b><b>I think I know what I'm</b><b>making for Father's Day.</b><b>OK. I think I always</b><b>make that on Father's Day.</b><b>Actually, she makes these</b><b>those spinach, whatever.</b><b>Casedillas. Yeah, those are so. Yeah. Yeah.</b><b>Maybe you have to pick. I'm not doing both.</b><b>OK, so you're in Tally,</b><b>you're living in an apartment.</b><b>You're on your own. You're cooking. You're</b><b>doing all the things.</b><b>What did you did?</b><b>You declare a major right from the start?</b><b>Yeah, I went up there</b><b>as an engineering major.</b><b>Wow. Yeah.</b><b>I got out of that real quick.</b><b>OK, so how long did that?</b><b>That does not work out.</b><b>How long did that last?</b><b>A year, maybe a year and a half.</b><b>Oh, that's a long time.</b><b>Now, a year and a half.</b><b>Yeah. So the fall of my</b><b>sophomore year, I switched majors</b><b>not by choice, necessarily.</b><b>I was just didn't have the grades and.</b><b>Yeah, joining a fraternity didn't help.</b><b>I wasn't taking it seriously.</b><b>Honestly, I was very</b><b>immature still, even though I was</b><b>I thought I was more mature</b><b>than a lot of kids my age.</b><b>But from like thinking of</b><b>me getting the floor to stay</b><b>in order to build my</b><b>future and actually get a degree</b><b>for something that I want to do and will</b><b>use that hadn't clicked.</b><b>Unfortunately, so I was just viewed classes</b><b>like I'll go to class sometimes</b><b>or things like that.</b><b>And then sophomore year that changed.</b><b>And I was like, all right, I need to do</b><b>something with my life.</b><b>So we can't get kicked out of school and we</b><b>have to like build a career</b><b>and future for ourselves. So yeah.</b><b>OK, so what did you switch to?</b><b>I switched to economics with</b><b>a minor in entrepreneurship.</b><b>So are you good at math?</b><b>Pretty good at math. Is that your strength?</b><b>That was my strength growing up. Yeah,</b><b>that's why I chose engineering.</b><b>OK, and did you graduate with</b><b>economics and an economics degree?</b><b>From Florida State. Yes. OK. Yeah.</b><b>And then what was your</b><b>did you have a minor?</b><b>Did you say</b><b>entrepreneurship entrepreneurship?</b><b>So you graduated with that.</b><b>Did you join a frat soft or freshman year?</b><b>Freshman year. Yeah.</b><b>Freshman year in the spring.</b><b>Were you part of Nathan</b><b>and Ben's pledge class?</b><b>No, I was the next one</b><b>probably then to to three after them.</b><b>Yeah. OK. I was a year</b><b>after that. Yeah. Yeah.</b><b>So what made you choose the frat you chose?</b><b>My random roommate was a capital. OK.</b><b>So we had four kids</b><b>living in that apartment</b><b>and my roommate was a capital.</b><b>So when I lived with him, he</b><b>was already in the fraternity.</b><b>He was already had an</b><b>established friend group, et cetera.</b><b>And fall went by.</b><b>I had gone to Kapisig twice, I believe.</b><b>Just for game days,</b><b>tailgates, things like that.</b><b>And then spring came around and.</b><b>They're doing rush, right?</b><b>So first day of rush,</b><b>he comes home, how to go.</b><b>Great, et cetera. Second</b><b>day of rush, he comes home</b><b>and he just flings the door open.</b><b>I'll never forget it.</b><b>I'm sitting on the couch</b><b>with a couple of my buddies</b><b>and he looks at me and he goes, so this is</b><b>your college experience?</b><b>He's like, this is what you're going to do.</b><b>You're just going to sit on the fucking</b><b>couch every day and just watch TV</b><b>and not do shit with</b><b>your college experience.</b><b>He's like, you need to</b><b>get up and do something.</b><b>He's like, I'm taking you to rush tomorrow.</b><b>And I was 18.</b><b>I was like, sure, why not? Let's do it.</b><b>And I went in and that</b><b>was the only frat I went to.</b><b>Got a bid and joined the fraternity.</b><b>Was that so that wasn't your</b><b>plan to be in a frat? Never.</b><b>Was there a reason behind that?</b><b>I never thought of it.</b><b>It just wasn't on your radar.</b><b>No. Wow.</b><b>What a life changing moment to have your</b><b>roommate do that for you.</b><b>Literally life changing. Yeah.</b><b>So you got into Kappa Sig.</b><b>So you're a grade behind Nathan, but two</b><b>years younger, right?</b><b>Yeah. Because you hopped grades. OK.</b><b>Um, what was your first</b><b>impression of the frat?</b><b>Oh, I don't even know if I remember.</b><b>I don't know. The house is intimidating</b><b>because there's massive mansion with a</b><b>bunch of dudes standing out there in suits.</b><b>It was very weird. It's</b><b>like you're going in there.</b><b>It's like you're going in there trying to</b><b>flirt with a bunch of guys</b><b>to tell them that you're cool and you guys</b><b>should take a chance on me.</b><b>So that was very weird. And I didn't know.</b><b>I didn't know what I was doing, right?</b><b>Like I didn't I just went in there and I</b><b>was like, yeah, this is what I do.</b><b>This is what I am.</b><b>Well, you'd only been in back in America</b><b>for two years, right?</b><b>Two and a half, two and a half years.</b><b>Yeah. So you I mean, you would acclimate it</b><b>back in, but still, that's pretty fresh.</b><b>Yeah. And is Greek life a thing in Morocco?</b><b>So it's such an American experience.</b><b>And it's probably not like you research</b><b>like did a ton of read.</b><b>It wasn't even on your radar.</b><b>My understanding of Greek</b><b>life came from watching movies</b><b>like American Pie and like Road Trip.</b><b>Yeah. It's like that.</b><b>Where you see the animal house.</b><b>Baby. I don't know.</b><b>That reminds me of Kappa Sick.</b><b>Yeah. Yeah.</b><b>So watch that movie.</b><b>Yeah. So you were going</b><b>in like probably wide eyed.</b><b>Yeah, very much so.</b><b>And I mean, I think that's a testament to</b><b>you because a lot of people go in there,</b><b>go into these processes trying really hard.</b><b>And the fact that you were you had no</b><b>choice but to be your authentic person.</b><b>You were supposed to be your authentic self</b><b>because you didn't know what you were</b><b>supposed to be doing.</b><b>Yeah. So they accepted</b><b>you for truly who you are.</b><b>Yeah. So that's kind of cool.</b><b>Yeah. It's very interesting because like</b><b>the cultures are different</b><b>like kids in high school.</b><b>Junior senior year.</b><b>A lot of them are working out.</b><b>A lot of them are like</b><b>playing football things like that.</b><b>Like that's the culture and I come in I'm</b><b>150 pounds soaking wet.</b><b>I don't never been in the gym.</b><b>Nothing like that.</b><b>Right. So the kind of things that they</b><b>looked for in the</b><b>fraternity kind of scoping phase,</b><b>I didn't really have like I wasn't jacked.</b><b>I didn't have like a bunch of</b><b>stories about a bunch of girls.</b><b>Like I had some but nothing like crazy.</b><b>So it was literally just me and they're</b><b>like, I don't know what</b><b>the fuck to talk about.</b><b>But I just moved here from Morocco.</b><b>Here's what I am.</b><b>Here's what I do.</b><b>And having my roommate</b><b>being capital probably helped.</b><b>But yeah, kind of help laid out.</b><b>And then you had mentioned earlier they</b><b>helped you guys with your</b><b>cleaning up your social media.</b><b>Did they how would you say Kappa Sig set</b><b>you up and help prepare</b><b>you for life after college?</b><b>There was a lot of stuff that was very very</b><b>starting voice to men.</b><b>Like you have all the partying and you have</b><b>all the actual brotherhood</b><b>and like stuff like that.</b><b>But there was a lot of stuff there like</b><b>they want you to take your your school</b><b>seriously now whether they preached or they</b><b>did what they preached.</b><b>That's a different thing.</b><b>But making sure like they know to teach you</b><b>not to drink and drive not to like black</b><b>out at the bar because you're embarrassing</b><b>yourself and the fraternity how to dress</b><b>how to like make a tie.</b><b>For example, when you're standing up your</b><b>suit should be buttoned when you're sitting</b><b>down your suit suit should be open.</b><b>Don't be a creep to women.</b><b>Just things that are really important for</b><b>guys to learn and it's not like it was I</b><b>don't want to say it was coming from like</b><b>like trying to like mature you but it was</b><b>more like we have a brand we have a name.</b><b>This is how real men treat themselves and</b><b>how they present themselves.</b><b>You need to do this.</b><b>Yeah, yeah, that's wonderful.</b><b>I always got the impression and again, I'm</b><b>just a mom that went there just a couple</b><b>times but I and I could be wrong but I felt</b><b>that Kappa Sig was a really authentic frat</b><b>and like real and wasn't trying as much to</b><b>put on some sort of illusion.</b><b>I guess if that makes sense, but just it</b><b>was more regular guys than it was right.</b><b>That would be my experience</b><b>as well more down to earth.</b><b>Yeah, does that make sense?</b><b>No, 100%.</b><b>It definitely was and I mean, we weren't</b><b>the coolest frat on campus.</b><b>We weren't getting the most girls.</b><b>We weren't the most popular by any means,</b><b>but just a bunch of guys</b><b>that cared for each other.</b><b>Yeah, I'm at the end of the day.</b><b>That's what it was and it was just normal.</b><b>Some normal dudes.</b><b>Well, when I was there for a</b><b>party, there were a lot of girls.</b><b>I mean, it was a rager.</b><b>So and you guys were on sorority row.</b><b>Yeah, so nice, but and right across from I</b><b>think pots and or what</b><b>right across from onyx.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>So the location you can't</b><b>beat the location of Kappa sick.</b><b>Not at all.</b><b>There's nothing better than that, but it</b><b>seemed like it was it was pumping.</b><b>But I mean, what you're saying as far as</b><b>the Brotherhood, it feels like the fact</b><b>that you guys were all able to be</b><b>yourselves, then you were able to truly</b><b>bond together because it was all real.</b><b>Would you say that's accurate?</b><b>Yeah, definitely.</b><b>And it's like the early it's it's an</b><b>interesting kind of pledge ship because the</b><b>early parts, it's all of the cookie cutter</b><b>stuff, if you will, like the stuff I just</b><b>talked to you about, like,</b><b>this is what's important.</b><b>This is what you need to do.</b><b>This is how you dress, how you act.</b><b>Don't get too drunk at the bar.</b><b>Don't black out.</b><b>Don't drive if you're drinking.</b><b>Can't get in fights with your</b><b>brothers, just shit like that.</b><b>And then as they weed it out, a lot of the</b><b>kids, that's where it kind of funneled down</b><b>into more fraternity, Brotherhood, actual</b><b>events where they're trying to teach you.</b><b>They're trying to put everyone else in the</b><b>fraternity against you so that you and your</b><b>pledge class bond together.</b><b>And there's a lot of experiences that they</b><b>put you through where you're like, all we</b><b>have is each other as the pledge class.</b><b>No one else here likes us.</b><b>I don't even know how we're going to be</b><b>these guys, brothers,</b><b>because they all hate us.</b><b>That's just the facade they put on.</b><b>So it turns you close to each other.</b><b>And that's like my</b><b>experience with my pledge class.</b><b>Like I'm the only one that</b><b>had an apartment at that point.</b><b>And I would have after any event, 13, 14</b><b>dudes on my couch and on the floor, just</b><b>debriefing and talking,</b><b>watching shows and just talking shit.</b><b>Right.</b><b>And is this during</b><b>rush you're talking about?</b><b>This is during pledge ship.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>And then once you're in, then I assume all</b><b>that stops and you guys</b><b>are one brotherhood, right?</b><b>And it's a mindfuck.</b><b>It's like I thought you hated it.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>What the fuck has been going on?</b><b>And they're like, no,</b><b>that's just how it is.</b><b>And then your brother and the new pledge</b><b>class comes in and it's the same.</b><b>You have to do it.</b><b>Yeah, do the same.</b><b>So I mean, I don't</b><b>know anything about that.</b><b>What is it?</b><b>Eight weeks, nine weeks of pledging?</b><b>Depends what you ask.</b><b>But it's a long time.</b><b>I feel like it's most</b><b>of that fall semester.</b><b>It's most of the semester and I don't want</b><b>to know everything that goes on as a</b><b>mother, but I can only imagine there's some</b><b>times that it's fairly traumatic or you're</b><b>not sure if you're going to make it.</b><b>I assume that's the job of the brothers.</b><b>So it must be such a</b><b>euphoric feeling when you do.</b><b>Yeah, 100%.</b><b>It's a journey and it's at certain points.</b><b>You're like, what the fuck am I doing?</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Why am I here?</b><b>I already had friends.</b><b>I enjoy what I was doing before.</b><b>Like, what is this?</b><b>Right.</b><b>But it's there's just so</b><b>many guys in there with you.</b><b>They're like, really, you're going to quit.</b><b>We're in this together and it's just set up</b><b>in a very, very interesting, like unique</b><b>way that you just have each other's backs</b><b>and you don't let each it's like.</b><b>You ever get in like someone starts being</b><b>really negative and then automatically you</b><b>start being more positive and in a</b><b>different conversation.</b><b>Flips.</b><b>That's kind of how it is.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Like someone's like, I</b><b>can't fucking do this anymore.</b><b>He's like, dude, relax.</b><b>You know, what's interesting is Nathan</b><b>tells us a lot, right?</b><b>He's shared a lot of</b><b>stuff with us over the years.</b><b>If you go in too deep on his that pledge</b><b>experience, he doesn't really go to he</b><b>doesn't share it with us.</b><b>Yeah, and it's probably the code you guys</b><b>have with the fraternity.</b><b>So it's like that's untouchable.</b><b>Can we respect that?</b><b>We don't we don't cry.</b><b>We don't cry.</b><b>That's and it's funny</b><b>because now we're grown men.</b><b>Yeah, I still don't talk about it.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>You know, no, no, no.</b><b>I think someone asked me, I'm not giving</b><b>him the full picture.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>It feels like you still owe something to</b><b>the fraternity and to like the the group</b><b>itself where you're like, I'm not going to</b><b>say what happened or what we</b><b>did or any anything like that.</b><b>Well, I mean, aren't you a brother for life</b><b>once your brother, you know, and would you</b><b>say you're still very close</b><b>to majority of your brothers?</b><b>Yeah, very much.</b><b>So, I mean, I talked to Nathan almost every</b><b>day, Mac, Ben, a zoo, Spencer, Evan.</b><b>It's a very big group and we're very</b><b>blessed to have each other,</b><b>but we talk almost every day.</b><b>Yeah, I travel.</b><b>That's who I travel with.</b><b>I've made a lot of friends at Florida State</b><b>outside of the fraternity, like my roommate</b><b>that I live with now, Juan and a lot of our</b><b>friends down there, but it's it's real.</b><b>You definitely stay together forever.</b><b>It's going to be the guys at my wedding,</b><b>hopefully my funeral.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Well, you do life together afterwards.</b><b>I think that was the gift</b><b>that Kapisig gave to all of you.</b><b>Do you do you know if other frets from FSU,</b><b>if they're as tight as you guys</b><b>are because you guys are tight.</b><b>It's cool to see from our perspective, but</b><b>are the other frets as tight?</b><b>A lot of them are.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>A lot of them are.</b><b>A lot of them don't have as big of a group</b><b>as we do that stay tight.</b><b>But like a lot of my friends in Miami, they</b><b>were all in the same fraternity granted.</b><b>A lot of them knew each other from Miami</b><b>before they went up to Florida State.</b><b>Yeah, but they're still tight.</b><b>A lot of fraternities are like that.</b><b>That remains the so like once you get to</b><b>junior senior year of college, you realize</b><b>you're like, oh, there's a ton of other</b><b>people out here that I could meet.</b><b>I shouldn't just stay in my fraternity.</b><b>You make a ton of other friends, especially</b><b>like working nightlife, things like that.</b><b>But the primary group</b><b>always remains that fraternity.</b><b>That's your core group.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>So you're saying economics.</b><b>You're in Kappa Sig.</b><b>Did you work at all?</b><b>Yeah, I did.</b><b>What was my first job?</b><b>My first job was a bar back at Baja's.</b><b>That's a bar in Tally nightclub.</b><b>Nightclub.</b><b>Tallahassee.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Mac, my friend Mac got me that job.</b><b>He used to bartend.</b><b>At one of the sister locations.</b><b>So I started bar back in there and then I</b><b>had a kitchen boy job at Zeta</b><b>when I joined the fraternity.</b><b>That's a sorority, right?</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>So what would you do?</b><b>I would clean the dishes, bring out the</b><b>food, change out the food</b><b>dishes, clean the kitchen.</b><b>And they paid you.</b><b>And they sent me home with like enough food</b><b>to feed me in the fraternity.</b><b>Was this the sorority right across the</b><b>street from you guys?</b><b>That's convenient.</b><b>Very convenient.</b><b>So was it just for their events or was it</b><b>for every time they had meals every day?</b><b>Wow.</b><b>Yeah, that's cool.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>So it's it's common.</b><b>Every sorority has their kitchen boys and</b><b>they'll bring out the food, serve it clean,</b><b>make sure the kitchen is</b><b>clean when they leave, etc.</b><b>And the page.</b><b>I don't know, it's$10 an hour.</b><b>Yeah, but how convenient is that?</b><b>Yes and food.</b><b>Yeah and food and you</b><b>get to meet some girls.</b><b>Yeah, right.</b><b>That's that's the extra bonus.</b><b>So how long did you do that?</b><b>Two years and then I got promoted.</b><b>So I was a bar back and then the bar owner</b><b>Zen, Zen and Simon,</b><b>they opened a second bar.</b><b>So I was a bar back there as well.</b><b>So I had kind of two jobs and then the</b><b>kitchen boy job and I got promoted to a</b><b>bartender at both of those</b><b>places and I was college rich.</b><b>So I just quit the kitchen boy job.</b><b>I had had enough of it.</b><b>House mom was crazy.</b><b>She's still alive.</b><b>But so you were working a lot.</b><b>Yeah, I was so my freshman year spring</b><b>break were down in Fort Lauderdale.</b><b>My dad didn't want me</b><b>to go to Florida State.</b><b>He wanted me to live with him and go to St.</b><b>Pete College like my brother, but he calls</b><b>me and he's like, hey, I'm not</b><b>paying for your shit anymore.</b><b>Come home and I'll pay for your shit.</b><b>So this was freshman</b><b>year at FSU spring break.</b><b>He's like, I don't want you up there.</b><b>Yeah, if you come home and go to school</b><b>here, I'll pay for everything.</b><b>It was sophomore year, actually.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>But yeah, he's like come home.</b><b>We're not doing this anymore because he was</b><b>supporting me sending</b><b>me money for everything.</b><b>And I was like, no, I'm not leaving.</b><b>I've made friends here.</b><b>I like it here.</b><b>I don't like St. Pete.</b><b>All my friends from high school in St. Pete</b><b>weren't doing anything with their lives.</b><b>So I was like, I'll figure it out.</b><b>So did he did he at least pay tuition or</b><b>was it up until that point?</b><b>Up to that.</b><b>So yeah, you're good.</b><b>Then all of a sudden he's</b><b>like, I want you to come home.</b><b>If not, you're on your own and that meant</b><b>tuition, room board, the whole thing.</b><b>Good.</b><b>Well, did something happen</b><b>to trigger that reaction?</b><b>So he'd never wanted me to go and my</b><b>brother being the great</b><b>brother that he is, literally</b><b>just sat him down and goes, this kid has to</b><b>go get his own college experience and live</b><b>by himself and grow up.</b><b>You need to let him to go to Florida State.</b><b>It's not that expensive.</b><b>Tuition wise, like tuition</b><b>was like $3,000 a semester.</b><b>Like tuition wise in</b><b>state, Florida is a deal.</b><b>Yeah, really.</b><b>Incredible.</b><b>Yeah, it is.</b><b>But yeah, so my brother convinced him and I</b><b>think my dad just got to a point where he's</b><b>like, I don't see this kid.</b><b>I don't know what the fuck he's doing.</b><b>He can come home and go to school here.</b><b>There's schools here and</b><b>I'll pay for your stuff.</b><b>So he just got nervous.</b><b>It sounds like about something.</b><b>He just wanted you home.</b><b>No idea.</b><b>He just wanted me home and I was a young</b><b>college kid that didn't ask why.</b><b>I was just like, no.</b><b>And so then you had to figure out how to</b><b>pay for tuition, room and board.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>And were you living in</b><b>the frat or in an apartment?</b><b>I was living in an apartment and this was</b><b>right before I started</b><b>working all these jobs</b><b>and I got evicted</b><b>because I couldn't pay rent.</b><b>Oh my god.</b><b>So I moved in to my buddy</b><b>Squawks room in the fraternity.</b><b>Squawk.</b><b>Yeah, Squawk.</b><b>They literally took me in and I literally</b><b>just slept on his couch</b><b>for like a whole summer.</b><b>And then now we're going into junior year.</b><b>Now we're going into, no,</b><b>we're going in a sophomore year.</b><b>I don't know why I mixed that up.</b><b>It was, yeah.</b><b>So it was freshman year.</b><b>It was freshman year.</b><b>So your dad kind of gave it that time and</b><b>but then he realized I can't do this.</b><b>The first year.</b><b>So you supported yourself through three</b><b>years of Florida State.</b><b>Three and a half.</b><b>Three and a half years of Florida State.</b><b>Yeah, I did an extra</b><b>semester my senior year.</b><b>So for sophomore year, where did you live?</b><b>Sophomore year.</b><b>Sophomore year is when I</b><b>moved into the fraternity house.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>So rent was $500 a month.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>And you were working these three jobs</b><b>basically for sophomore</b><b>year and in a frat and studying</b><b>economics and entrepreneur.</b><b>That's a lot.</b><b>It was a lot.</b><b>It was fun.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>It was a good time.</b><b>And then you ended up making enough bar</b><b>backing that you could</b><b>quit working at the sorority.</b><b>No, I didn't quit working at the sorority.</b><b>So I got promoted to a bartender.</b><b>Okay, and we were making for college</b><b>comparatively to rent what</b><b>you spend on food on alcohol.</b><b>If you were to go out, etc.</b><b>Like I was making a lot of money.</b><b>Yeah, it was like maybe$1,500 a weekend.</b><b>Oh, wow.</b><b>But back then, that's a good change.</b><b>No, that's a lot of a lot.</b><b>You rent $500.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>And we're eating Chipotle</b><b>and Chick-fil-A every day.</b><b>Yeah, or I'm cooking at home and being in</b><b>the nightlife scene, you're</b><b>not paying to get into any of the</b><b>bars.</b><b>You're not paying for drinks.</b><b>So we were college rich.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>And you could that's more than enough to</b><b>cover your tuition by far.</b><b>Yeah, everything.</b><b>And I got financial aid.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>So there you go.</b><b>That's impressive though</b><b>that you did pulled that off.</b><b>Yeah, I honestly like because you hustled</b><b>until you got to a stage</b><b>where a job that you could quit</b><b>the other jobs, but you you did what you</b><b>needed to do and you still</b><b>were able to fulfill your</b><b>commitments as a brother with Kappa Sig and</b><b>still make grades and</b><b>graduate with your degree.</b><b>I mean, have you recognized how hard you</b><b>worked and balanced during</b><b>that time yet in your life?</b><b>I don't think about it often.</b><b>It's kind of just like it's always been you</b><b>got to do what you got to do, right?</b><b>Like you're not we're not just going to lay</b><b>down and fail or take it</b><b>like this is these are the</b><b>circumstances what needs to be done to get</b><b>through them and you just do it.</b><b>Yeah, I've always known you as a hustler.</b><b>I appreciate that.</b><b>Yeah, I remember you hustling in college.</b><b>I think you're probably hustling now.</b><b>I know we'll probably get there a little</b><b>bit, but yeah, well and</b><b>you're done is a good example of</b><b>that.</b><b>You've grown up with a great model of that</b><b>and plus the life</b><b>experiences you went through, you</b><b>know, suddenly moving from America back to</b><b>Morocco and then moving</b><b>you've been placed in situations</b><b>where I got to figure this out.</b><b>I got it.</b><b>I have to adjust to this.</b><b>So you would already practice that</b><b>throughout your childhood and</b><b>then you were able I think that</b><b>benefited you and things hit you at FSU.</b><b>I think so because I was a mama's boy</b><b>growing up not even by choice.</b><b>Like my mom was just so in my shit.</b><b>Like my mom knew everything I was doing</b><b>always what I was doing.</b><b>She made my schedule, etc.</b><b>When I was in middle school and early high</b><b>school, which looking back</b><b>at it, I'm so thankful for.</b><b>Yeah, she's the reason I learned the</b><b>language is I know she's the</b><b>reason I played sports out of</b><b>school like this woman would just go above</b><b>and beyond to make sure I</b><b>was filling my time learning</b><b>doing like God bless her.</b><b>Yeah, but having her removed from the</b><b>picture junior year of high school.</b><b>It's just like all right, you got to start</b><b>growing up right now.</b><b>Like my aunt has her own kid in the job.</b><b>Like she's not looking</b><b>after every single detail.</b><b>So I think that played a big role and by</b><b>the time I got to</b><b>Tallahassee, I was alone alone, but it's</b><b>been like I've it's kind of been like this</b><b>for a year and a half two years now.</b><b>Yeah, no, I think you're right that huge</b><b>adjustment from</b><b>because I'm that type of mom.</b><b>So I know exactly what</b><b>you're talking about.</b><b>So I'm just picturing of like Nathan had</b><b>gone through that where all of</b><b>a sudden I wasn't in his life</b><b>and the huge adjustment he would have had</b><b>to make at that time.</b><b>So I understand what you're talking about</b><b>when you're saying that so</b><b>the growth that had to have come</b><b>during that time is indescribable and was</b><b>preparing you I think for what happened at</b><b>Florida State because</b><b>then when that was laid out</b><b>for you, you didn't hesitate.</b><b>You're like I can do this.</b><b>Yeah, you know, and then you did.</b><b>I had no idea how I was going</b><b>to do it, but you figured it out.</b><b>I figured it out.</b><b>It feels like though that background you</b><b>described is what gave you the strength</b><b>perseverance perspective</b><b>to get up every day and</b><b>go take care of your shit.</b><b>Yeah, right.</b><b>I would think so.</b><b>100% strong background family background.</b><b>So if you had to pick one of your best</b><b>memories from your time up in</b><b>Tallahassee, what would that be?</b><b>It doesn't have to be the</b><b>best memory, but one of them.</b><b>That's tough.</b><b>I don't know.</b><b>Get it joining the frat was great.</b><b>Getting promoted to a bartender was great.</b><b>I don't know it would have to</b><b>be a lot of the trips we took.</b><b>We as you guys know, we went</b><b>to a lot of music festivals.</b><b>We traveled a lot.</b><b>So that was always some of the best times</b><b>we've ever had when you'd beat a music</b><b>festival and you look around</b><b>and there's like 20 of your best friends</b><b>all there together like Okachobi that</b><b>always comes up as as</b><b>one of the best times.</b><b>Just having everyone there.</b><b>Everyone's happy.</b><b>Everyone's safe.</b><b>I would say those are probably the best</b><b>moments either trips or our our ways of</b><b>taking trips back then</b><b>were music festivals.</b><b>Yeah, I would say it was probably the music</b><b>festivals when you had everyone together.</b><b>Let's say say one of those.</b><b>Yeah, most likely the first Okachobi.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Yeah, that's the one</b><b>that sticks out always.</b><b>I remember hearing things about that from</b><b>Nathan and I know that all of those are</b><b>such cherished memories for him.</b><b>Yeah, and then later for Kaya.</b><b>Exactly.</b><b>She was brought into the mix,</b><b>you know, so that's wonderful.</b><b>So when you graduated, did you already have</b><b>a plan of where you were</b><b>going and what you were doing?</b><b>I had no idea what I was</b><b>doing or where I was going.</b><b>I graduated and me and Nate were close at</b><b>that point and he's like,</b><b>hey, I work at this company.</b><b>Granted, they're hiring.</b><b>You need a job?</b><b>I was like, yeah, I do and</b><b>I need somewhere to move.</b><b>So that's a prime example of the fraternity</b><b>training changing everything.</b><b>And I know we've talked about the</b><b>fraternity a lot, but it really was a</b><b>pivotal thing in my life because I met Nate</b><b>through the fraternity.</b><b>He's my best friend brother till this day.</b><b>He got me my first job out of college.</b><b>I learned how to work like a office job</b><b>there, learned good habits, etc.</b><b>And that set me up for where I'm at now.</b><b>And where did you live when</b><b>you first got out of school?</b><b>I got out of school.</b><b>I went home to Tampa, St. Pete, where my</b><b>dad was at while I applied for the for</b><b>granite where Nate worked and then I got</b><b>hired and moved down me</b><b>and Nate moved in together.</b><b>And that was down here in South Florida.</b><b>And Delra in Boynton.</b><b>Now, did your dad go to graduation?</b><b>We didn't have a graduation.</b><b>It was COVID.</b><b>You were part of the COVID graduation.</b><b>Yeah, yeah.</b><b>He went to my high</b><b>school graduation, of course.</b><b>Yeah, cried so much.</b><b>Yeah, yeah.</b><b>I've never seen him cry two times.</b><b>My brother's graduation and my graduation.</b><b>That's cool.</b><b>I still think about all you kids that</b><b>didn't get graduations and the high</b><b>schoolers that didn't get prom and my heart</b><b>just breaks because you</b><b>can't go back and get that.</b><b>So now I'm sure your mom, though, is very</b><b>proud and thrilled for you</b><b>with graduating from method.</b><b>Was she okay with Florida State?</b><b>She yeah, she's like go.</b><b>She was not okay with me changing majors.</b><b>But yeah, she was like, if your dad can</b><b>afford it, if you guys can figure it out,</b><b>wherever you need to go, you</b><b>just need to get an education.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>And my mom is she's like, why are you not</b><b>getting your master's degree?</b><b>Why are you not getting this?</b><b>You need to be getting educated more.</b><b>So anyway, I can make myself better.</b><b>My mom's all for it.</b><b>Yeah, your big your biggest cheerleader.</b><b>Exactly.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>So you're living in South Florida.</b><b>You're working your first job and your</b><b>first office job, as you said.</b><b>So what was your</b><b>impression of the corporate world?</b><b>This is fucking terrible.</b><b>My first company was the most boring.</b><b>Terrible company.</b><b>I was working with the most bland people.</b><b>It was nothing was good about it.</b><b>Like if Nathan wasn't there as my roommate,</b><b>my coworker, I probably</b><b>would have lost my mind.</b><b>Like I didn't like the</b><b>people I worked with.</b><b>I sold phone and as a salesperson, my job</b><b>was to sell phone and internet lines to</b><b>businesses, right from</b><b>T-Mobile Verizon, AT&T, Comcast, etc.</b><b>And we had the discounted business rates.</b><b>So you're calling C like CFO, CIOs,</b><b>executives, IT people, etc.</b><b>And you're like, hey, I can save you money</b><b>on your phone and internet.</b><b>And their response is I set up my phone and</b><b>internet when we started this company.</b><b>And my goal was to never</b><b>think about this ever again.</b><b>I don't want to talk to you.</b><b>There's nothing to be spoken.</b><b>My very tough sale, right?</b><b>Yeah, my phone bills$1,500.</b><b>You're going to save me $500.</b><b>I think we're good.</b><b>That sounds like a lot of a savings though.</b><b>$500.</b><b>It's a pain in the ass to</b><b>switch and it could fail.</b><b>There's risk associated.</b><b>Yeah, but it just</b><b>wasn't a lot of rejection.</b><b>A lot of rejection.</b><b>I wasn't excited about what I was doing.</b><b>It was boring.</b><b>Would you say you learned anything though</b><b>from all that cold calling?</b><b>Absolutely.</b><b>One thing you can't dismiss about that</b><b>company is their training.</b><b>They had something called Granite</b><b>University where they</b><b>taught you a lot about their</b><b>solutions, a lot about how to position</b><b>them, how to sell and being at a company</b><b>that's way bigger and way better funded and</b><b>has is public like all these things.</b><b>They don't have that and the amount they</b><b>invested in their people is something</b><b>that I definitely still</b><b>appreciate to this day.</b><b>So it's almost like a little bit of an</b><b>extension of your education for my career.</b><b>Yes.</b><b>Yeah, that you took with you.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>So I always say those jobs those first jobs</b><b>even though they suck there's something</b><b>you invariably take with you and there's</b><b>parts of it that you</b><b>always continue to benefit</b><b>from through the rest of your careers.</b><b>You just don't realize it</b><b>until you're away from it.</b><b>Absolutely.</b><b>Like I've always told Nathan.</b><b>It's like you start in phone sales.</b><b>It's sort of a rite of passage in many ways</b><b>for bigger and better sales jobs because if</b><b>you can handle the rejection and the</b><b>repetitiveness the</b><b>redundancy the call call call call you</b><b>learn the gift to gab you get somebody to</b><b>hold on and talk to you</b><b>for 30 seconds instead</b><b>of go fuck yourself.</b><b>You know, yeah, it's</b><b>it's a great great lesson.</b><b>Yeah, absolutely.</b><b>And you also get to figure</b><b>out what you don't want to do.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Yeah, very important.</b><b>Yeah, that's that's just as important.</b><b>So how long were you there?</b><b>Year 12 months and then what happened and</b><b>then I went to the company.</b><b>I'm at today.</b><b>SAP.</b><b>So I met someone on my friend</b><b>Madison was having her birthday.</b><b>We rented out a boat in Miami and we're out</b><b>on the water having fun.</b><b>I meet this guy and he's</b><b>like, what are you doing for work?</b><b>I'm like, I work at this company.</b><b>I fucking hate it and he's like, well, I</b><b>work at this global software company.</b><b>We're hiring right now.</b><b>Literally just met this guy.</b><b>He's like, I'll refer you if you want refer</b><b>me got the interview</b><b>got the job or they were</b><b>about to make me the job offer and they're</b><b>like, well, you have to</b><b>move to Boston for this job.</b><b>I was like, all right, fuck it.</b><b>Looked up the company learned about it.</b><b>How big they are how they're the number one</b><b>in the space they're in number</b><b>one company in the space that</b><b>they're in and yes took the risk.</b><b>So you moved to Boston.</b><b>Yep.</b><b>And how long were you up there 13 months</b><b>and how it because you're coming from</b><b>Morocco and then Florida.</b><b>I assume this is the</b><b>coldest place you've lived.</b><b>Awesome.</b><b>So how was the was it a</b><b>bit of a culture shock?</b><b>How was Boston for you?</b><b>It was not great.</b><b>I didn't like Boston.</b><b>I didn't like the people.</b><b>I didn't like the weather.</b><b>I don't want to be a Debbie downer, but</b><b>that's not the place for me at all.</b><b>So what parts of it weren't a fit the</b><b>people in what way very snotty</b><b>kind of like entitled people.</b><b>Obviously, there's plenty of great people</b><b>that I met up there that</b><b>are still friends to this day.</b><b>So it's not everyone from Boston is that</b><b>but it's just there's no like I didn't what</b><b>they do on a day to day</b><b>what their activities were their interests</b><b>just didn't align with me.</b><b>They had their sports teams and they had</b><b>their underground bars that they would</b><b>drink at all the people I</b><b>met and that that was not a lot of joy</b><b>there right not at all.</b><b>They're not the happiest people.</b><b>They're not the happy.</b><b>I like being outside.</b><b>I like doing shit.</b><b>They there was none of that.</b><b>It was just all drinking and sports.</b><b>Do they not have outdoor activities?</b><b>They do.</b><b>Okay, doing me and my roommate who was a</b><b>blessing that I lived with him.</b><b>That's all we would do</b><b>when it wasn't winter.</b><b>They had a beach there.</b><b>We would go to all the time a beautiful</b><b>Park called the Commons</b><b>right in the middle of Boston.</b><b>The city is absolutely beautiful and the</b><b>history the history the food the culture,</b><b>but I just didn't mesh</b><b>well with the people.</b><b>I might have been where I</b><b>was at that point in my life.</b><b>Maybe I just went in not liking it, but I</b><b>did not enjoy my time.</b><b>Keep in mind you're cooped up like I know</b><b>someone who lives there.</b><b>It's like 50 degrees there this weekend.</b><b>It's 90 here.</b><b>Yeah, so it's still kind of chilly.</b><b>It's probably not gray and depressing</b><b>because the leaves have finally come out,</b><b>but it's colder most of the year.</b><b>Yeah, that's exactly right.</b><b>And people have this mentality where they</b><b>just accept that it's the</b><b>winter and we're not going to do it.</b><b>Anything was going to stay at home.</b><b>We're not going to work out</b><b>not an active lifestyle at all.</b><b>And I'm like this was depressing.</b><b>Yeah, like get up and do something though.</b><b>I go.</b><b>No, it's snow and it's cold.</b><b>I'm like this is not</b><b>what I want in my life.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>So when your time was up</b><b>there, you were ready to come back.</b><b>Yeah, I tried to get out of</b><b>there before my time was up there.</b><b>Yeah, it was that the mothership in the US.</b><b>Does that why you had to go up there or no?</b><b>So they had just opened an office up there</b><b>and they were hiring</b><b>people for my role out of there.</b><b>So they wanted me to move up there.</b><b>Now it's Atlanta.</b><b>So everyone that's</b><b>getting hired now is in Atlanta.</b><b>And yeah, that's just where</b><b>they had all their funding.</b><b>They got a new office and they</b><b>were trying to grow that team.</b><b>Yeah, what are you doing for that company?</b><b>I'm an account executive.</b><b>So I'm a salesperson.</b><b>I lead our engagements with customers to</b><b>identify any challenges.</b><b>They're looking to address any process</b><b>improvements, any initiatives, etc.</b><b>I'll bring in my team will identify like</b><b>the software that we have will</b><b>identify the challenges, etc.</b><b>How they want to improve</b><b>their business challenges.</b><b>They're dealing with and then the software</b><b>solutions that will help them get there how</b><b>they'll help them get there.</b><b>We show them that and</b><b>then we sell them software.</b><b>Okay, and are you enjoying it still?</b><b>Yeah, I love it.</b><b>It's really hard and I like it a lot.</b><b>It's challenging.</b><b>It's very challenging.</b><b>So were they okay with you leaving Boston?</b><b>I got promoted.</b><b>Okay, so then you could leave.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>So when I got promoted, I got promoted to</b><b>the South team and was fully remote.</b><b>So I left Boston.</b><b>And then where did you</b><b>go when you left Boston?</b><b>I came down to Fort Lauderdale.</b><b>I moved in with with Nick that you guys</b><b>know if you haven't</b><b>listened to that episode.</b><b>We did an episode with Nick Witcher from</b><b>Yif now, which stands for</b><b>yo, it's fucking nice out.</b><b>And he's a entrepreneur.</b><b>So definitely look for that episode.</b><b>It's a it's a great</b><b>episode and you lived with him.</b><b>I did last year.</b><b>Check out Yif know.com.</b><b>Yes, you need some trendy great clothes.</b><b>It's not just a clothing company.</b><b>It's a lifestyle.</b><b>It's a yeah, it's a great out.</b><b>It is.</b><b>It's a great brand.</b><b>You know, I don't know.</b><b>I did.</b><b>Do you know about his five</b><b>the five senses that they have?</b><b>It's he wants the whole brand</b><b>to be felt with all the senses.</b><b>So see here touch smell and taste.</b><b>Okay, so they're expanding into all those.</b><b>So he they have a wine that they're</b><b>developing and a candle for sense.</b><b>And the scene would be the scene, you know,</b><b>yeah, and the hearing is the radio, the Yif</b><b>no radio and then the</b><b>touch is the clothing.</b><b>Yeah, I think that's brilliant marketing.</b><b>He's he cares about his company a lot and</b><b>he's put a lot of time and</b><b>effort and just is intentional</b><b>with what he does.</b><b>And I don't think it's an if it's a one.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Oh, 100% blow up that manly works very very</b><b>hard and he's a visionary.</b><b>I would say yeah, I mean, I highly I'm</b><b>telling you listeners,</b><b>you should go to Yif no.com</b><b>and get some stuff</b><b>because I agree with you.</b><b>It's going to be a when you're going to be</b><b>hearing about this</b><b>brand more than you realize.</b><b>So get in get in now.</b><b>Get in now.</b><b>Bye.</b><b>Bye early.</b><b>Yeah, the other thing to mention is for</b><b>folks who did listen to</b><b>that episode Nick is up in</b><b>New York like he talked about</b><b>and he's so it's all going well.</b><b>That's a great point.</b><b>He's up there now.</b><b>Yeah, head first.</b><b>Only reason he's up there is the company.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>So and follow him on</b><b>Instagram and TikTok as well.</b><b>Okay, so so you lived with Nick last year</b><b>and then are you still in Fort Lauderdale?</b><b>I'm in Miami now.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>What made you decide to go to Miami?</b><b>Nick was leaving.</b><b>So he was moving up to New York.</b><b>I knew that and the rest of my friends</b><b>outside of my friend Tito, Eric and my</b><b>buddy Roland who was</b><b>moving in with his girlfriend.</b><b>All the rest of my friends</b><b>lived either in Miami or Boca.</b><b>So it was all right.</b><b>They live by myself or I try somewhere else</b><b>out and my plan in life is to end up in St.</b><b>Petersburg near the rest of my family</b><b>that's located here in the US.</b><b>So let's try Miami.</b><b>Let's give it a shot.</b><b>I always love Miami.</b><b>I think it's one of a</b><b>kind probably my favorite.</b><b>City.</b><b>So yeah, just gave it a shot.</b><b>I had one of my best friends Juan that</b><b>needed a roommate as well.</b><b>So it kind of lined up</b><b>perfectly and you're enjoying it.</b><b>I love it.</b><b>So are there any cons to living in Miami?</b><b>There's plenty of cons.</b><b>There's cons of living everywhere.</b><b>Yeah, but would you what would you say?</b><b>It sounds like Miami is a really good fit.</b><b>Is there anything that doesn't fit for you?</b><b>A lot of the people down there.</b><b>There's a lot there's</b><b>a lot of great people.</b><b>Some of my favorite people live down there,</b><b>but there's definitely a</b><b>culture of like influencers</b><b>and gold diggers and things like that as</b><b>the stereotype is and</b><b>that's just not doesn't really</b><b>mesh with me give you an example.</b><b>You go to the gym.</b><b>Everyone has a fucking tripod</b><b>recording themselves workout.</b><b>Okay, that's annoying.</b><b>I'm just like what are we doing here?</b><b>Yeah, like listen.</b><b>If you're some Jack dude or some girl</b><b>that's absolutely ripped</b><b>and Jack and you're making</b><b>content great, but when you look like every</b><b>other guy like when you're literally just</b><b>felt like a normal dude and you're</b><b>recording every workout</b><b>you do I'm like what what are</b><b>we doing here?</b><b>Yeah, you ever photobomb anybody like get</b><b>in and mess with their shots or anything.</b><b>I don't mess with it, but I don't like you</b><b>don't you don't around it.</b><b>I don't adjust at all.</b><b>I walk right in front of your camera.</b><b>I don't give a fuck.</b><b>Do they get mad?</b><b>I don't care.</b><b>I look at them.</b><b>I pay for the gym too.</b><b>It's true.</b><b>Well, a lot of gyms are now</b><b>starting to have no recording.</b><b>What do you call it like rules rules</b><b>because it's getting so crazy.</b><b>Yeah, and also a lot of people are</b><b>recording the locker rooms</b><b>and so and then that's people</b><b>are suing.</b><b>Yeah, so they're</b><b>starting to be like nothing.</b><b>Yeah, you know, I could see that it's gone</b><b>so far that pretty soon.</b><b>There'll be just a few gyms where</b><b>influencers can go and the</b><b>rest of them will get back to</b><b>normal.</b><b>Yeah more but but overall</b><b>Miami's yeah, Miami's great.</b><b>I really like one thing.</b><b>I really like about Miami's.</b><b>There's a lot of Hispanic</b><b>people in Hispanic culture.</b><b>Yeah, and their people in their culture the</b><b>way they interact with their families.</b><b>They way they care about each other and</b><b>their friends and how</b><b>it's always family first in</b><b>like kind of the community first that</b><b>reminds me a lot of Morocco and how</b><b>I grew up in my family.</b><b>So I love that so much like all my friends.</b><b>I know their parents grandparents.</b><b>They always invite us over</b><b>will hang out with them, etc.</b><b>And that that feels like something.</b><b>Yeah, yeah something important and reminds</b><b>you of home a little bit.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>So who's insane Pete?</b><b>Is it your dad?</b><b>It's my brother my dad my brother's wife my</b><b>nephew Zane and my aunt</b><b>her son and my cousin.</b><b>Okay, so I heard some would</b><b>be your cousin too, right?</b><b>Okay.</b><b>So you have some cousins you have your</b><b>nephew who's how old is he now?</b><b>He's going on nine months now.</b><b>Oh my gosh, and I've seen pictures.</b><b>He's adorable.</b><b>He's a cutie.</b><b>He loves being an awful.</b><b>I love it.</b><b>I love that kid so much.</b><b>You it's it's insane.</b><b>I am single-handedly moving back to St.</b><b>Petersburg because of him.</b><b>Yeah, because I just want to be around for</b><b>him coming up and all</b><b>the small moments teach</b><b>him how to play soccer</b><b>teach him everything everything.</b><b>I know you probably didn't know how what</b><b>what it meant how it</b><b>would feel until they handed</b><b>him to you and then all of a sudden you're</b><b>like, oh, I will literally kill for this.</b><b>Right, right, right.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Did you cry when you</b><b>held him for the first time?</b><b>I did not.</b><b>But it gives you a little bit of a window</b><b>into what it's like to be a parent.</b><b>It does and how much love you have parent</b><b>has for their child and how</b><b>much damn effort goes into it.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Nonstop ever never ends never ends like it</b><b>was seven like I used to go</b><b>over to my brother's place</b><b>and we used to hang out play video games or</b><b>go out and play soccer or shit like that.</b><b>Now it's like he's on the clock.</b><b>Yeah, we might get an hour to 11 p.m.</b><b>It's it's funny you say that</b><b>my buddy came over earlier.</b><b>He had his kid with him and I noticed I'm</b><b>just sitting against the car and he's</b><b>walking around the kid</b><b>goes further so I had to shift cars.</b><b>I was chillin, but he's having to chase</b><b>this little guy around.</b><b>Yeah, a lot of work.</b><b>It does evolve.</b><b>Yeah, and nothing else is</b><b>nothing's the same anymore.</b><b>Right.</b><b>You have this person that relies on you for</b><b>everything and if anything happens to them,</b><b>it's your fault.</b><b>Yes, you're yeah, their caregiver.</b><b>Does that does that scare you to be a dad</b><b>or make you want to be one?</b><b>I'm really excited.</b><b>Yeah, it does not scare me.</b><b>That's cool.</b><b>Yeah, because it isn't</b><b>just the physical safety.</b><b>You're I always say you're wearing your</b><b>heart on your sleeve and then when your</b><b>children leave your heart leaves with them.</b><b>It's the emotional and mental exhaustion of</b><b>the worry the love all that.</b><b>So that's what really never ends because</b><b>there is an evolution.</b><b>Eventually, you're not having to follow</b><b>them around all the time, right?</b><b>But almost the more independent they get</b><b>the bigger the worries are but it's so</b><b>rewarding like there.</b><b>I always say there's an emotion.</b><b>You don't have until you become a parent.</b><b>It's a totally different</b><b>emotion and once you become a parent,</b><b>you're like, oh and then you also</b><b>understand why your</b><b>parents were maybe were so crazy.</b><b>It's because you're like, I get it now, you</b><b>know, but it's it's cool.</b><b>I'm happy for your brother and his wife to</b><b>I'm sure they're loving it.</b><b>They are they're great</b><b>parents both awesome.</b><b>And then how's your dad doing over there?</b><b>He's doing well.</b><b>He's doing well.</b><b>Yeah, my dad has had</b><b>Parkinson's disease for since he was 47.</b><b>So about 15 years now.</b><b>Wow.</b><b>So he got pretty far.</b><b>It got pretty bad.</b><b>Okay, so was he when he came back over</b><b>here, did he open up more businesses?</b><b>Yeah, same business that he has station.</b><b>Yeah, and then so he's just working his job</b><b>running his gas station.</b><b>And then what made him go to the doctor</b><b>when he was around that age to say</b><b>something's going on.</b><b>Do you know he got diagnosed Parkinson's</b><b>and Morocco before we moved back here.</b><b>So okay, so you had this right here like</b><b>between your index and your thumb.</b><b>Yeah, started hitting one of these started</b><b>like like twitching and just moving his</b><b>finger on its own, right?</b><b>Okay, he wasn't in control.</b><b>So you went to doctors like the fuck is</b><b>this and they were like you have early</b><b>symptoms of Parkinson's</b><b>and then they went from that muscle to his</b><b>hand to his arm to his</b><b>like whole arm and shoulder</b><b>and then just spread across his whole body.</b><b>So the progression how long did that take</b><b>about to be like to its</b><b>worst point like 10 years.</b><b>So from like 47 to 57 is</b><b>when it was progressing.</b><b>Yeah, how old is he now 62</b><b>going to turn 62 in in August.</b><b>So that had to have been a complete blow</b><b>for you and your brother.</b><b>Yeah, and for him and</b><b>well obviously for him.</b><b>Did he continue running his gas station</b><b>through the progression of</b><b>the disease until towards</b><b>the end and he had a couple and then he</b><b>sold sold one of them and then</b><b>yeah, just had the single one.</b><b>And how did his mental state how was that</b><b>affected during that time?</b><b>Very much so because as a man being the</b><b>provider forever now</b><b>you're walking into a room.</b><b>Everyone's like oh my god, you're so sick.</b><b>I feel so bad for you.</b><b>You just stopped seeing people.</b><b>Okay, just was was there pressure on you to</b><b>come back and run the</b><b>family business at all?</b><b>My brother was helping with that.</b><b>I've made it clear from early on that I</b><b>didn't want to do that.</b><b>Yeah, but there was a little bit of</b><b>pressure up front and I told him I was</b><b>like, that's not being a boy.</b><b>Yeah, but the mail.</b><b>Yeah, I was like, I don't want to yeah,</b><b>that's not the career path.</b><b>I'm taking.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>So did he end up kind of isolating himself?</b><b>Yeah and not seeing friends not going to</b><b>mosque family or no family not</b><b>even your mom, sister cousins.</b><b>What about you?</b><b>Yeah, absolutely.</b><b>So you and your brother</b><b>became his only people.</b><b>Yeah, see what about his daughter and his</b><b>girlfriend and then</b><b>your brother's girlfriend.</b><b>No, my my dad's girlfriend.</b><b>Oh, so he has a girlfriend.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>Has she been there since he got to America</b><b>basically like with him a long time?</b><b>She's yeah, she's been</b><b>him with him for a while.</b><b>So she's been here during the progression.</b><b>She's lives in Morocco and visits.</b><b>Okay, but she'll come here for extended</b><b>periods of time, but</b><b>pretty much that was it.</b><b>He had her and me and my brother and yeah,</b><b>he kind of just isolated himself didn't</b><b>enjoy being around people and it's a very</b><b>interesting disease because the more</b><b>stressed out you get the more you shake.</b><b>Yeah, so he would go to a restaurant.</b><b>He'd be fine.</b><b>Then the waiter would start asking him</b><b>questions and he'd start shaking a little</b><b>bit and then he'd notice someone looked at</b><b>him shaking and he starts shaking more.</b><b>So it's really tough</b><b>and it got interesting.</b><b>It's tied psychologically.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>That it what's going on in your brain can</b><b>trigger it like right then.</b><b>Yeah, it's not just the like</b><b>an autoimmune physical thing.</b><b>There's I was I was talking about this</b><b>where psilocybin is being experimented on</b><b>with Parkinson's patients.</b><b>So minor doses of</b><b>psilocybin magic mushrooms, right?</b><b>And it's helping because it reduces the</b><b>anxiety and the depression and it has a</b><b>positive impact on the on</b><b>the twitching and the shaking.</b><b>Yeah, fascinating stuff.</b><b>But there is a mind body component, you</b><b>know, obviously but yeah, more a</b><b>psychological mind part of it.</b><b>So it the area that creates dopamine in</b><b>your brain doesn't create it anymore when</b><b>you have Parkinson's.</b><b>That's one of the main causes.</b><b>So I'm sure that helps</b><b>with with the psilocybin.</b><b>But so then you're taking a medicine that</b><b>creates fake dopamine and that's dangerous</b><b>because you're taking a dopamine pill.</b><b>But yes, pretty crazy.</b><b>Did the dopamine pill</b><b>make the Parkinson's worse?</b><b>No, it made may have made the Parkinson's</b><b>worse, but it helped with the</b><b>symptoms at that point in time.</b><b>So he was shakeless.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>So basically if his brain chemistry was</b><b>regulated, then he should he shook less.</b><b>Yes.</b><b>So did he try any experimental?</b><b>Well, he's he's pretty much good now.</b><b>So what happened?</b><b>So he found out about a surgery</b><b>called deep brain stimulation.</b><b>Deep brain stimulation.</b><b>This is pretty incredible.</b><b>I think Nathan gave me the update and I'm</b><b>curious to hear this actually.</b><b>It's absolutely fascinating.</b><b>It's one of the most incredible things that</b><b>I've seen and it's like I've always</b><b>respected doctors and</b><b>nurses, but seeing this go down.</b><b>I was like these people are God sense and</b><b>this is like it made</b><b>me reconsider my career.</b><b>I was like, this is a real fucking job.</b><b>Yeah, like what I'm doing is I'm just</b><b>making money like this is a</b><b>real fucking me with these exactly.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>So for your dad's Parkinson's that he had</b><b>had for what 14 years, he's tried this new</b><b>surgery called brain</b><b>deep brain stimulation.</b><b>Brain stimulation.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>So for our listeners who maybe have are</b><b>going through that or have family members,</b><b>can you describe what that is?</b><b>Yeah, absolutely.</b><b>So what they do is they</b><b>insert a device into your brain.</b><b>So it's brain surgery.</b><b>Okay, and you have your right side of your</b><b>brain, your left side of your brain.</b><b>So there's two devices in there and they</b><b>insert a device in a battery that device</b><b>goes all the way into like the middle part</b><b>of your head where your dopamine is created</b><b>and it that device with the battery heats</b><b>up that area in your brain.</b><b>So that it starts creating dopamine again,</b><b>because that's what's created that heat</b><b>that pressure in there.</b><b>There's obviously a scientific explanation</b><b>that I don't know, but this is how the</b><b>doctor explained it to me.</b><b>So this device is</b><b>connected to a remote, right?</b><b>You turn it on and it starts heating up</b><b>that area of your brain and pretty much</b><b>reverses what caused your Parkinson's.</b><b>So instead of you lacking dopamine for it</b><b>not being able to heat up now, it heats up</b><b>and you're producing dopamine like normal.</b><b>So you stop shaking and you literally have</b><b>a device that you can turn on</b><b>or turn off that controls that.</b><b>That is amazing.</b><b>It's it's it's insane.</b><b>Didn't Nathan, I think he might have been</b><b>telling me it might have I might be</b><b>confusing things, but wasn't he awake as</b><b>they were doing it or</b><b>did he get knocked out?</b><b>He got knocked out.</b><b>He did.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>He he got knocked out.</b><b>They put it in and then they will come up</b><b>and tested it on him for the</b><b>first time while he was awake.</b><b>Okay, but how long was he</b><b>in surgery for four hours?</b><b>Maybe five and was this in St.</b><b>St. Pete, Tampa General.</b><b>So Tampa General in Florida</b><b>does the doctor Oliver Flutie.</b><b>Shout out to that man.</b><b>Absolute impeccable human great doctor very</b><b>respected in that hospital.</b><b>Clearly very young man.</b><b>He just changed all of our lives.</b><b>That is amazing.</b><b>With his hands.</b><b>So your dad now can</b><b>function normally doesn't shake.</b><b>He doesn't shake.</b><b>Yeah, this park.</b><b>So everyone associates the</b><b>shaking with Parkinson's, right?</b><b>Were there other things like psychological</b><b>things or mind function symptoms?</b><b>Yeah, or yeah.</b><b>Well, I think the psychological things were</b><b>mainly created by a you shaking how you</b><b>feel by yourself and be the medicine you</b><b>take because you're pretty much taking.</b><b>A medicine that creates fake dopamine in</b><b>your head and that leads to compulsive</b><b>behaviors like like I was just reading</b><b>about this because I didn't even know what</b><b>this drug was until years in my dad taking</b><b>it and I actually listen to</b><b>a podcast and heard about it.</b><b>But this medicine creating fake dopamine</b><b>gives you compulsive</b><b>habits like drinking gambling.</b><b>Trying to sleep around double-edged sword.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Were you seeing your dad having any of</b><b>those traits from that medicine?</b><b>Not necessarily, but I spent very little</b><b>time with my dad being going to college and</b><b>then yeah, Boston, etc.</b><b>So I wasn't with him for</b><b>extended periods of time.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>So all of these symptoms, I'm just reading</b><b>about him, but he's done with that, right?</b><b>He doesn't take the medicine anymore.</b><b>So he's living a normal life now.</b><b>He got another lease on his life.</b><b>And how long ago was this?</b><b>January.</b><b>So it was recent.</b><b>Very recent.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>And is the recovery minimal?</b><b>It's a couple weeks.</b><b>I went up there.</b><b>I took care of him.</b><b>I took him to surgery, stayed with him</b><b>throughout surgery, took care of him until</b><b>he was back to like 80, 90%.</b><b>It's a miracle.</b><b>Yeah, it's a miracle.</b><b>It's a hundred percent a miracle.</b><b>It's a miracle.</b><b>So what how has he retackled life?</b><b>What things has he done again?</b><b>Now?</b><b>He's been traveling.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>He's been literally just</b><b>enjoying his life, working out.</b><b>He's living the life of a young man again.</b><b>Has a smile again.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>He can hold his grandson.</b><b>Yeah, probably couldn't</b><b>as well before right now.</b><b>He was scared to.</b><b>Yes, I mean, yeah.</b><b>Like he was so self-conscious that he</b><b>wouldn't want to do that.</b><b>That's amazing.</b><b>That's amazing.</b><b>I mean, that is God's son.</b><b>I think in the world a couple months ago.</b><b>He's he's a new man.</b><b>It's it's really really incredible.</b><b>And you said he's going to be 63.</b><b>He's so young man.</b><b>I know it sounds old to you guys, but trust</b><b>me, you're still living when you're that</b><b>age.</b><b>Absolutely.</b><b>So you're not even retired for most people.</b><b>No, that's absolutely okay.</b><b>So again, if anyone has a family member or</b><b>suffering this themselves, it's called deep</b><b>brain stimulation, deep brain stimulation</b><b>and Tampa General definitely does it.</b><b>And the doctor again, Oliver Flutie, Doctor</b><b>Oliver Flutie,</b><b>incredible man, great man, great</b><b>doctor life change.</b><b>And the success rate is your dad.</b><b>Is that a pretty normal example of the</b><b>success rate of the surgery?</b><b>Yep.</b><b>The doctor was like don't you</b><b>have nothing to worry about?</b><b>He's like we do this all the time now and</b><b>it's it's it's successful.</b><b>I'm blown away.</b><b>Me too.</b><b>And listen, I may have messed up or gotten</b><b>some of the details</b><b>wrong around the sickness</b><b>to medicine, etc.</b><b>I'm not a doctor obviously, but that's the</b><b>surgery he got and that's the results that</b><b>I've seen with my own eyes.</b><b>It's amazing.</b><b>People can just go Google it.</b><b>Yeah, don't take my word for it.</b><b>That is I'm all Tampa General.</b><b>They'll tell you all about it.</b><b>I'm so happy for your dad for you, your</b><b>brother, your whole</b><b>family, your nephew, your whole</b><b>family.</b><b>Yeah, it just I am so it's so wonderful.</b><b>Yeah, that's that's great.</b><b>So that's that's like 2025.</b><b>Anything else can happen that 2025 is</b><b>already the best year.</b><b>Yep for that.</b><b>So it's crazy.</b><b>He's walking around with two batteries in</b><b>his head at all times.</b><b>Can you see them like</b><b>they're probably small, right?</b><b>Yeah, so the doctor being the genius that</b><b>he is, he put the</b><b>devices in right where his</b><b>hairline starts.</b><b>So his hairline covers the scars.</b><b>It's amazing.</b><b>Yeah, it's amazing to go to like a</b><b>follow-up to get the batteries either</b><b>recharged or replaced</b><b>or I imagine there's</b><b>some maintenance to go on.</b><b>25 year battery.</b><b>Shit.</b><b>Yeah, new new technology, the latest one.</b><b>Yeah, and usually a lot</b><b>of people do one battery.</b><b>And then it's takes up more energy.</b><b>So it's a shorter time frame.</b><b>The doctor goes, I</b><b>recommend you getting to your 60.</b><b>You'll probably never have to get a change.</b><b>That's wow.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>So were you having to help him out at all</b><b>once you got out of</b><b>school and you were working,</b><b>were you having to go back to St.</b><b>Pete to like help him when he was in the</b><b>deep throes of the suffering?</b><b>No, because thankfully my</b><b>brother was always there.</b><b>Okay, my brother never left St.</b><b>Pete.</b><b>So my brother was always taking him to his</b><b>doctor's appointments,</b><b>helping him out, whatever</b><b>he needed.</b><b>And my dad being the man that he was wasn't</b><b>the one the type to ask for help.</b><b>So yeah, I was either my brother would help</b><b>him out with things or he would just figure</b><b>it out.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Was there anything that you learned from</b><b>watching your dad go</b><b>through this that you took away</b><b>from it?</b><b>Like short.</b><b>So enjoy it.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>One day you could be healthy the next year.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>I have a disease like Parkinson's that will</b><b>completely change your life, whatever.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>So enjoy it.</b><b>Yeah, it's true.</b><b>It's it's something</b><b>that it's easy to forget.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Every day truly is a gift</b><b>and your health is a gift.</b><b>They always say like people for most people</b><b>you have a hundred problems, but if you are</b><b>suffering from a health issue, you only</b><b>have one problem and that's it.</b><b>So your health is is the number one thing.</b><b>Yep.</b><b>So a lot of people have a lot of money and</b><b>a lot of resources and they get cancer and</b><b>die.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Unfortunately, so very important.</b><b>I'm I'm I'm absolutely</b><b>thrilled for your family.</b><b>I just I can't imagine now when was the</b><b>last time you saw your mom?</b><b>January last year.</b><b>How often do you see her?</b><b>I try to go once a</b><b>year this year with work.</b><b>It's delayed, but I plan to go July 3rd and</b><b>then do you stay for a</b><b>while when you go back</b><b>there?</b><b>It's about 1520 days.</b><b>Okay, which of course</b><b>is not enough for her.</b><b>No, no, I come for a month.</b><b>I'm like mom.</b><b>I have a career and a job.</b><b>I can't leave her mom.</b><b>Can she not come back here at all?</b><b>Not yet.</b><b>You want to figure that out for is there</b><b>hope that eventually</b><b>she will be able to she on</b><b>like is there some US law like if you get a</b><b>seven years seven year violation?</b><b>Okay.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>So you got to be coming up on that, right?</b><b>We're past it.</b><b>So now it's just paperwork, paperwork</b><b>reapply got rejected and I</b><b>was got to hire a good lawyer</b><b>that knows what he's doing.</b><b>He's done this before.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>And hopefully they'll help her out and it's</b><b>tough time right now to write.</b><b>It's yeah, it's not the ideal time to try.</b><b>I told her last</b><b>administration is probably your best shot.</b><b>Yeah, it just got dropped</b><b>off in Mexico and walked over.</b><b>Yeah, yeah, it's true.</b><b>But but she probably</b><b>doesn't want to live here again.</b><b>Does she?</b><b>I want to live here.</b><b>So just the freedom she</b><b>can't even come visit, right?</b><b>So it's just the</b><b>freedom to be able to visit.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>So I mean, hopefully I assume by the time</b><b>at least your you have a family.</b><b>Hopefully this will all be I'm sure it's</b><b>killing her that she can't see her.</b><b>Has she seen him?</b><b>No, not yet been nine months.</b><b>She hasn't seen them yet.</b><b>So me and my brother trying to get that</b><b>figured out so she can at least come see</b><b>come see him here because it's</b><b>easier for her to come here than three</b><b>people to go over there.</b><b>Right, right.</b><b>And they probably want the baby a little</b><b>older even before they</b><b>would take him over there.</b><b>So but I'm sure they FaceTime.</b><b>Yeah, all that stuff.</b><b>All that all that stuff.</b><b>So I'm sure she's absolutely both your</b><b>parents are over the moon</b><b>about being grandparents.</b><b>Oh, yeah.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Yeah, that's that's the</b><b>next thing on our list.</b><b>Hopefully I've been looking</b><b>forward to that for 10 years.</b><b>Oh, I can't even</b><b>imagine like here that Nathan.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Oh, he knows he knows he knows.</b><b>Okay, so I have to ask you because you are</b><b>out there on the heart of it.</b><b>What is it like for your age out there</b><b>dating because you have the dating apps.</b><b>You have social media</b><b>when we were growing up.</b><b>It was just old school meet people face to</b><b>face and maybe call</b><b>them on a landline phone</b><b>and maybe make plans for the weekend.</b><b>And that was it for you guys.</b><b>I feel like there's so</b><b>many variables involved.</b><b>There is there are I</b><b>don't use the dating apps.</b><b>So I can't really speak to that much.</b><b>I did back like around college right out of</b><b>college, but don't</b><b>really use them too much.</b><b>But it's interesting.</b><b>I mean a lot of people's initial contacts</b><b>are established over social media.</b><b>Like I've met a lot of friends and girls</b><b>that I've maybe dated or</b><b>taken out on a date or something</b><b>like that via social media stumble across a</b><b>profile like a good-looking person looks</b><b>like they got a decent life.</b><b>We have some friends in common.</b><b>Let me reach out.</b><b>So that's interesting.</b><b>I think a lot of people are now relying on</b><b>social media and on</b><b>the dating apps and won't</b><b>just walk up to a girl at and everything I</b><b>say is from a man's</b><b>perspective because I don't</b><b>have the other but walk up to a girl at a</b><b>bar and just ask her for her name number.</b><b>How you doing?</b><b>Let me take you out.</b><b>Let me get to know you whatever it may be.</b><b>So it's very interesting.</b><b>I think it makes things simpler for the</b><b>guys that are willing to</b><b>go out and talk to girls</b><b>and meet them and not nervous</b><b>or worried about those things.</b><b>But yeah, it's do you get so are you one?</b><b>Are those guys that will go</b><b>up and just talk to a girl?</b><b>It depends.</b><b>I feel like when I'm out more more often</b><b>than not but like I don't</b><b>just randomly see a girl walking</b><b>down the street or like right a gym or</b><b>something and just walk up.</b><b>I should but I don't when</b><b>you have approached girls.</b><b>Is it up to get a positive response or they</b><b>kind of taken aback that</b><b>you're using this approach?</b><b>Depends on the girl.</b><b>Yeah, depends on my approach friends where</b><b>you're approaching them.</b><b>Yeah, it's a really wide range of answers</b><b>there but certain</b><b>girls want to meet someone.</b><b>So they'll talk to you.</b><b>They'll get to know you and they'll either</b><b>enjoy the conversation or their walk away.</b><b>Right.</b><b>Just like anyone else would some girls are</b><b>stuck up and don't want</b><b>anyone to walk up to them unless</b><b>they pick them.</b><b>So there's that and some</b><b>girls will walk up to you.</b><b>It just depends on your luck and what you</b><b>do how you walk up what you say.</b><b>Are you getting the vibe though that in</b><b>general people your age do</b><b>still want to get married have a</b><b>family have a future or is it still very</b><b>much dating hookup culture for your age?</b><b>I feel like most of my</b><b>guy friends want kids.</b><b>A lot of girls I know don't want kids.</b><b>That's interesting.</b><b>Very interesting.</b><b>Interesting.</b><b>That is.</b><b>But I'd say most of my close friends other</b><b>than the couple plan to</b><b>get married and have kids.</b><b>What about your friends that are girls?</b><b>They're the ones who are saying they don't</b><b>want kids not like all of them but a lot of</b><b>girls that I know don't</b><b>want to have kids.</b><b>There's a shift.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>What is that shift?</b><b>What do you think is going on?</b><b>I know what's going on.</b><b>There's a shift with the</b><b>gens and I could be wrong.</b><b>I'm curious your thoughts</b><b>on it with the Gen Z girls.</b><b>There's a shift I think because that well</b><b>we've talked about this the Gen</b><b>Z girls are not going to take on</b><b>the domestic load at home</b><b>like the Gen X women did.</b><b>They have higher standards and expectations</b><b>of their partner and I think they also view</b><b>having kids is giving</b><b>over a lot of themselves and a lot of their</b><b>life and I don't know if</b><b>they're willing to do that.</b><b>I'm curious that I get your perspective.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Talked a lot about that.</b><b>But do you does that resonate?</b><b>Yeah, that was going to ask you.</b><b>Do you think that they they don't want to</b><b>carry the domestic load?</b><b>Is that part of the</b><b>baggage of it in the sense or?</b><b>I would think so.</b><b>I think that a lot of them just either have</b><b>higher expectations their quotes</b><b>on them of what they want to do</b><b>with their lives.</b><b>I think it's common when a lot of people or</b><b>a lot of women that are stay-at-home moms.</b><b>You ask them what they do and they say I'm</b><b>just a mom which is not something to say.</b><b>I'm just about having been raised by a mom</b><b>who's a stay-at-home mom.</b><b>It's job that doesn't end.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>But it's just the the culture now.</b><b>You should have your career.</b><b>You should be making your own money.</b><b>You should be independent girl boss,</b><b>whatever you want to call it.</b><b>Yeah, and that just doesn't align with</b><b>having kids because a lot of</b><b>times people think of having kids</b><b>and they're like all the</b><b>wife's going to stay at home.</b><b>The mom's going to stay at home and take</b><b>care of them and feel like a lot of people</b><b>in our generation view that</b><b>as like you settled.</b><b>Yeah, yeah, I do.</b><b>I think that the and I do think there are</b><b>women in your generation that</b><b>do want to be stay-at-home moms.</b><b>I think that they are getting they do get</b><b>judged for sure like their viewed as like</b><b>tradwives or something</b><b>like that.</b><b>But I think you're right.</b><b>I think it's that the value of a mom</b><b>staying home and raising the kids has has</b><b>lowered been lowered so much in their</b><b>eyes or they naturally think or they</b><b>automatically think it would be them.</b><b>But maybe if you maybe when you meet</b><b>someone you talk about the rules, you never</b><b>know there could be a guy</b><b>that's like I'll stay</b><b>home if you want to work.</b><b>Honestly, there are guys.</b><b>Yeah, if I got the offer, I would do it.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>She's girl bossing like that.</b><b>And if the guy was like I'll work from home</b><b>and I'll take care of the kid like there's</b><b>ways to work this out.</b><b>100% there's ways to work this out.</b><b>Like it's their detriment if they</b><b>automatically think they're</b><b>the ones that would stay home.</b><b>They're almost being misogynistic about</b><b>themselves because there could be guys out</b><b>there that would meet them halfway</b><b>and say no we could figure this out.</b><b>It's not all on you.</b><b>Yeah, you have to have that conversation</b><b>100% but I do think the value of although</b><b>I'm I'm wondering if it's changing</b><b>because I do see and again,</b><b>this is just on social media.</b><b>There are girls out there around your age</b><b>that are like, you know what</b><b>this girl boss thing isn't quite.</b><b>I want to live a soft life.</b><b>Yeah, this is like I don't want to be</b><b>grinding grinding grinding.</b><b>I think this stay at home.</b><b>Mom thing actually is a good deal.</b><b>I've heard that from a few girls recently.</b><b>They're like, I'm tired of working.</b><b>I need to get married and have a kid.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>I don't blame you.</b><b>I think that they maybe are going through</b><b>their 20s and thinking that and then some</b><b>of them are like, I don't want to do this</b><b>is a lot like you not</b><b>that I was a stay at home.</b><b>Mom, it's you're right.</b><b>It's 24 seven.</b><b>It never ends.</b><b>Yeah, and we and we had a very traditional</b><b>mirror and I've talked about this in our an</b><b>episode is very traditional marriage where</b><b>he worked and I was home and I took care of</b><b>everything on the domestic front and I if I</b><b>could go back, I would have had that more</b><b>of a conversation and divided up the</b><b>domestic load more but</b><b>that's not our generation.</b><b>I think your generation has adjusted and</b><b>changed and they've watched their moms</b><b>their aunts their grandmas</b><b>work themselves to death.</b><b>They're like, I don't want that not</b><b>realizing doesn't mean just because you</b><b>have a family you're going to have that you</b><b>guys have evolved talk talk it out like the</b><b>men in your generation.</b><b>I think would meet your the</b><b>women in your lives halfway.</b><b>I don't think you guys are going to come in</b><b>and say no you cook every night and you do</b><b>all the cleaning and I think you guys are</b><b>more evolved than that.</b><b>We have to be open to that conversation.</b><b>Yeah, I agree.</b><b>And I think especially with the work from</b><b>home age now barriers never been lower.</b><b>You can have a career and raise kids.</b><b>I don't know how you would do that.</b><b>I don't you might have to bring in someone</b><b>to help, you know, but you're at least</b><b>still there's still a parent, you know,</b><b>having someone help you and the parent is</b><b>in the house is different</b><b>than my buddy's daycare.</b><b>Yeah, my buddy's doing that works great.</b><b>Yeah, I had I had someone in the house</b><b>growing up as well in Morocco.</b><b>Yeah, and it's helpful.</b><b>I mean, there's a lot of shit to do always.</b><b>Oh, always.</b><b>But then they're not just left with a</b><b>stranger and you're not there.</b><b>Yeah, you know, or with a person like</b><b>you're still there's</b><b>still a parent present.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>So there's ways to do this and I think your</b><b>generation like you said, we even work from</b><b>home has all of the options</b><b>to make it work as a couple.</b><b>Yeah, and it doesn't have to be these</b><b>automatic roles like</b><b>your roles can be fluid.</b><b>They can change.</b><b>So one person may have a better paying job</b><b>for five years and then the other person</b><b>may get you know, I mean,</b><b>so I I just still be curious to see how if</b><b>the girls in your generation more of them</b><b>open to that possibility because I think a</b><b>lot of them are like our thinking I don't</b><b>want to just be tied down by taking care of</b><b>a family, but I think there's ways to not</b><b>you're not going to</b><b>necessarily be tied down.</b><b>Do you guys think though it's tied down to</b><b>a family or tied into a relationship</b><b>because you can be the dink.</b><b>That's exactly what I</b><b>was just about to say.</b><b>I was going to say that I feel like a lot</b><b>of the people you hear this from guys and</b><b>girls just haven't found their person yet.</b><b>Yeah, and you do and</b><b>then you're like, oh shit.</b><b>Well, I didn't think about</b><b>getting married, but that's my girl.</b><b>That's my guy.</b><b>I'm going to stay with them and you get</b><b>married and you're like, well, I will have</b><b>a kid with that person and</b><b>all of that starts to change.</b><b>You're right.</b><b>Yeah, no, I think you're</b><b>right, but I think you're spot on.</b><b>Yeah, but I do think it's important to have</b><b>that conversation about the</b><b>roles before you get married.</b><b>I always say that</b><b>established have that talk.</b><b>Like how do you see this</b><b>home running when we have kids?</b><b>How do you start it right from the because</b><b>a lot of people will wait get married and</b><b>then they realize we're on two totally</b><b>different pages and then it doesn't work.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Okay.</b><b>So I have another question just to get your</b><b>opinion from someone your age.</b><b>I personally think that when a guy meets</b><b>this person, he knows</b><b>pretty quickly and within a year.</b><b>He knows if he's going to marry her and he</b><b>will make his move within a</b><b>year or two to lock her down.</b><b>Do you think that's true?</b><b>I don't know.</b><b>I really don't.</b><b>I haven't experienced that yet.</b><b>So have do you know anyone</b><b>who's gone through that yet?</b><b>Yeah, I know a couple people that met their</b><b>girl or girlfriend and pretty quickly were</b><b>like, this is my one.</b><b>Sometimes it doesn't work</b><b>out, but sometimes it does.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Now, what about as far as even dating like</b><b>his situation ships and all that are</b><b>rampant in your generation?</b><b>I'm assuming you have had girlfriends.</b><b>I have so before you've take have you known</b><b>pretty quickly the</b><b>girls that you have dated?</b><b>Have you known pretty quickly?</b><b>I'm going to date her.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Okay, right away.</b><b>So that would be the equivalent.</b><b>Yeah of that.</b><b>I would think so.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>Yeah, like my ex-girlfriend in college.</b><b>I think I wanted to date her.</b><b>I don't know if you wanted to date me, but</b><b>I kind of like wiggled my</b><b>way in there high school.</b><b>Same thing.</b><b>Girl was on the soccer team.</b><b>I was on the soccer team and</b><b>not to sound like a weirdo.</b><b>I was 15, but like I would</b><b>watch after I would practice.</b><b>I'd watch them practice.</b><b>I was like, oh, I need</b><b>that girl right there.</b><b>So I've always had like a someone that I</b><b>wanted in whether I've gotten them or not</b><b>when I did get them that</b><b>ended up being a relationship.</b><b>Yeah.</b><b>So do you think it's fair to say a guy</b><b>knows when it's someone either is going to</b><b>date or marry a guy knows what he wants?</b><b>Yeah, and he'll go for it.</b><b>Like here's here's the way I put it a guy</b><b>knows whether he wants to have fun with the</b><b>girl whether he wants to</b><b>take her serious pretty quickly.</b><b>Okay, and I always say a girl if you if a</b><b>girl feels confused about a guy then he</b><b>then he's not sure about</b><b>like he shouldn't feel confused.</b><b>If a guy wants you and</b><b>likes you he makes it clear.</b><b>It depends on the age in college.</b><b>It's all confusion because in college</b><b>you're fighting the battle of I want this</b><b>person, but I'm really young</b><b>and this is my college experience.</b><b>So it's constantly pushing and pulling of</b><b>that a lot of people meet someone in</b><b>college that may have worked out for them,</b><b>but they're just not mature enough yet.</b><b>But at an older age post graduation like 25</b><b>plus I think it should be pretty.</b><b>It should be pretty clear clear.</b><b>Yeah, so if that's my opinion if a guy is</b><b>breadcrumbing you or dangling the carrot</b><b>and carrying a situation ship situation</b><b>ship then should the girl kind of assume</b><b>he's not going to date you?</b><b>Yeah, I don't think so.</b><b>Right.</b><b>Yeah, that's what I think.</b><b>That's what I wanted.</b><b>No, no, no.</b><b>Yeah, it's the dragging on</b><b>and well, I kind of like you.</b><b>I like you, but that's you see they're</b><b>looking for company sex or just something</b><b>in between there in that scenario.</b><b>Do you think the guy has a couple of those</b><b>going on would that be</b><b>more of a typical thing?</b><b>A lot a lot of times yes, but I don't think</b><b>it's exclusive to guys.</b><b>I think a lot of girls have a lot of things</b><b>on the side going on as well.</b><b>But a person that does that consistently</b><b>usually has a couple of people,</b><b>especially my generation.</b><b>It's called a roster.</b><b>But usually there's a</b><b>there's a couple of people.</b><b>Now, when you when you say girls do it, do</b><b>they also breadcrumb?</b><b>And meaning, you know, I'll give you a</b><b>little bit here, a little bit here,</b><b>just to keep you in. Yeah.</b><b>Well, it's different because with guys, as</b><b>if a girl is giving you sex,</b><b>that's pretty much all right.</b><b>Do you care about to</b><b>stay in the picture? Right.</b><b>So with I feel like with girls, it's a</b><b>breadcrumb, breadcrumb of sex.</b><b>And with guys, it's a breadcrumb of</b><b>attention and emotions.</b><b>Yeah. Right. And that's</b><b>that's the difference.</b><b>So some girls just want to</b><b>have someone that they can call</b><b>whenever they want to and get laid.</b><b>But don't you think like I know people say</b><b>like girls do situationships, too.</b><b>But don't you think it's</b><b>rare that a girl is doing that</b><b>and the guy is wanting to lock</b><b>her down and she's like, no, no,</b><b>I just want to have sex.</b><b>Is it isn't it more guys?</b><b>Because I just don't it seems like if the</b><b>guy is getting sex, like you said,</b><b>and that's pretty much what he wants, then</b><b>when did there be few</b><b>like a few number of guys that would be</b><b>like, no, but I also want a relationship.</b><b>And she's like, no, I</b><b>just want to have sex.</b><b>I think a girl is quicker to</b><b>cut it off if a guy gets feelings.</b><b>So she doesn't have to deal with that.</b><b>OK, versus a guy, a lot</b><b>of guys, not all guys.</b><b>They'll drag it on as long as they need to.</b><b>They'll play the mind.</b><b>They'll play the mind game.</b><b>She doesn't want to deal with that.</b><b>Certain guys are definitely like that.</b><b>Certain girls are like that as well.</b><b>But I feel like girls don't get too messy</b><b>when it comes to that.</b><b>They're just like, this</b><b>guy wants me way too much.</b><b>I'm just getting out of it</b><b>versus a guy sometimes is like.</b><b>I got this girl.</b><b>She wants me like I got this in the bag.</b><b>I can do whatever I want in this situation.</b><b>And and he will as long as she allows it.</b><b>And that's why I say I think it's on the</b><b>girls to they're in control</b><b>of the situation, and</b><b>how far it goes in general.</b><b>I know there's girls</b><b>that play the game, too.</b><b>But in general, at least</b><b>when it's going off a guy,</b><b>I think the girl is the one</b><b>that can either stop it or not.</b><b>And if she's giving it</b><b>up, she's not stopping.</b><b>Yeah. Well, sometimes you don't know.</b><b>Sometimes you see a light</b><b>at the end of the tunnel.</b><b>But it's just someone's flashlight.</b><b>It's not an actual.</b><b>So that's why I say by three months,</b><b>they need to have a</b><b>conversation and be like, what is this?</b><b>And if he can't answer,</b><b>then they need to walk away.</b><b>Three months is probably a</b><b>good amount of time for that.</b><b>Yeah, I would say so.</b><b>If it's like consistent for three months.</b><b>Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I think two</b><b>months, but I don't know about</b><b>with your generation, two</b><b>months may sound too fast</b><b>and two months may feel too</b><b>soon to truly know someone.</b><b>It depends on the three months.</b><b>I feel like.</b><b>It could be three</b><b>months where you saw someone</b><b>once a month or every other weekend.</b><b>That's very different than three months</b><b>where you're meeting with someone.</b><b>Sometimes it's a month and a half where</b><b>you're seeing someone</b><b>multiple times a week all the time.</b><b>True. Then it's like,</b><b>what are we doing here?</b><b>Versus like they could it</b><b>could be a three months where</b><b>I see a girl two weeks in a row and I don't</b><b>see her for like a month.</b><b>And I see her again a</b><b>couple of times in a row.</b><b>So like that emotion comes up and then it</b><b>fades and then it comes up again.</b><b>And it's like you're not</b><b>thinking about them too much.</b><b>But if it's all back to back to back,</b><b>you're always hanging out with them.</b><b>You're always with them. It's like, all</b><b>right, what are we doing here?</b><b>That speeds up the timeline.</b><b>And then I feel like that's</b><b>more the girls probably saying,</b><b>what are we doing here</b><b>more than the guy? Right.</b><b>More. Yeah, guys</b><b>definitely say that as well.</b><b>But I think girls would</b><b>probably say that more.</b><b>Yeah. Yeah. Do you</b><b>think that that's affected</b><b>dating for you guys,</b><b>this whole situation ship?</b><b>Or do you think it actually is a pro and</b><b>allows you to get to know</b><b>different people and have all these</b><b>different experiences</b><b>with different people?</b><b>I think it depends how you take it.</b><b>I think it definitely lets you allows you</b><b>to know a lot of different people</b><b>and know what you like in a in</b><b>a person, what you don't like.</b><b>I think it's always also given birth to</b><b>this red flag generation.</b><b>In this era where it's like and I saw</b><b>something on the podcast the other day</b><b>from Andrew Schultz, where</b><b>he was like, this red flag</b><b>shit is just people that are lonely trying</b><b>to be with someone they</b><b>don't want to be with.</b><b>And they're like, oh,</b><b>that's the red flag I don't like.</b><b>It's like if you really liked someone,</b><b>there's a bunch of red flags,</b><b>but you just fucking figure it</b><b>out and deal with them. Yeah.</b><b>True. I mean, barring abuse.</b><b>Of course. Yeah. Yeah.</b><b>Yeah. That's not a red flag.</b><b>That's yeah. Yeah. That's a run. Yeah.</b><b>That's a run. Find help.</b><b>Yeah. But you're saying yes. Yeah. Because</b><b>for sure in our generation,</b><b>we all look past the red</b><b>flags and just went for it.</b><b>And then we either worked it out or we</b><b>might have gotten divorced 10 years later.</b><b>But yeah, your generation is</b><b>way aware of red flags. Yeah.</b><b>Like I. Yeah. I knew this girl that showed</b><b>me a shared notes document</b><b>that she had with her girlfriends and it</b><b>was 300 points long of red flags.</b><b>Yeah. And it was shit like when you come</b><b>home and he's on the couch,</b><b>cuddled up in a blanket. Well, that's like</b><b>X. Yeah. X. Yeah. Yeah.</b><b>Like red flags and X. Yeah. It's like,</b><b>yeah. What are we doing here?</b><b>No. And it's the question of are the X</b><b>going to stop you from dating this guy?</b><b>Because it's really</b><b>analysis paralysis. Yeah.</b><b>Like you start picking apart something so</b><b>much that you're not going to move</b><b>forward with anything because someone,</b><b>everyone's going to have something.</b><b>Yeah. Well, you know, it's it's it.</b><b>I think it's indicative of just our</b><b>generation of having a ton of options</b><b>for everything, whether</b><b>it's food on Uber Eats,</b><b>whether it's places to travel because you</b><b>can go anywhere you want to.</b><b>People to date because of social media, you</b><b>have a thousand followers</b><b>and that's not that many nowadays. Yeah.</b><b>So you're seeing all these people and</b><b>you're like, well, I could have that.</b><b>Like, no, you're not</b><b>going to have that. Right.</b><b>You're going to have the</b><b>same or similar type of people</b><b>that you've been with</b><b>your whole life for a reason.</b><b>So it's just too many options all around.</b><b>I think you're right. And I think it's it's</b><b>so much that no one can make a decision.</b><b>Yeah. And like a lot because</b><b>there's always that thought.</b><b>But there could be</b><b>something else better. I'm settling.</b><b>Yeah, you're suddenly</b><b>you think you're settling.</b><b>Yeah. Like that, because there could be</b><b>that next thing, that next thing.</b><b>And then eventually you may if you live</b><b>your life like that, you're like 50</b><b>and you never made a</b><b>decision or or did anything.</b><b>You just are constantly</b><b>and there's people like that.</b><b>There's people that are 40, 45, 50 that</b><b>haven't done anything.</b><b>And they're from an older generation.</b><b>So I can't even imagine for you guys the</b><b>detriment that that can have.</b><b>Yeah. Sometimes you</b><b>just got to take a risk.</b><b>Like you got to go for it.</b><b>Yeah, you got to go for it.</b><b>It might be some things you don't like and</b><b>you can work them out.</b><b>But if you're not willing to take that</b><b>risk, you just end up surface level.</b><b>You got to try. Yeah, you got to try.</b><b>I think we talked about that</b><b>one of our earliest episodes</b><b>is if you think you've met</b><b>someone, you've got to just do it.</b><b>Have the full authentic experience.</b><b>And like you're saying, if it falls apart,</b><b>you at least had an experience, but</b><b>constantly dipping your toe in the water</b><b>and never jumping in, you're not living.</b><b>You got to go for it sometime or else</b><b>you're really only getting like 20 percent</b><b>of what this whole experience could be.</b><b>Yeah. And every experience</b><b>gives you something to learn.</b><b>You learn something like you had said</b><b>earlier with your job, your first job.</b><b>You learned what you don't want.</b><b>Same with dating. Same with dating.</b><b>And every I always say</b><b>every person you date</b><b>is a stepping stone</b><b>leading you to your person.</b><b>So but if you never take those steps,</b><b>you're not going to get there.</b><b>You know, and I know there's going to be</b><b>women are like, well, I don't want to get</b><b>my but most people do want to partner.</b><b>You know, I even with the girl boss and all</b><b>that, I think most people invariably</b><b>want that person that's their person, that</b><b>is their best friend.</b><b>They can talk to about anything.</b><b>You know, life's not easy.</b><b>So it's much easier to do</b><b>it with your best friend.</b><b>But you got to be open to that.</b><b>So I think it's what's natural.</b><b>Yeah. A man and a woman find each other,</b><b>get married, have kids.</b><b>You start a family.</b><b>Yeah. Like that's natural.</b><b>And people can try to</b><b>fight that in whatever ways.</b><b>There's plenty of ways that that they do.</b><b>But the end of the day, that's what's been</b><b>going on for all of humanity.</b><b>And that's what's natural.</b><b>Well, it can give your</b><b>life a lot of meaning to.</b><b>Yeah. And purpose and</b><b>direction and all those things.</b><b>I think honestly, his perspective is the</b><b>most completely we've had so far.</b><b>Yeah, because we've focused so much on guys</b><b>are doing a situation ship to girls.</b><b>But you brought up a really good point.</b><b>They're doing it as well.</b><b>So the whole situation is really tough for</b><b>everybody involved, I think, in that.</b><b>And everything you</b><b>guys just said is spot on.</b><b>But this is a two way street and it's not</b><b>just guys trying to get</b><b>into situation ships with girls.</b><b>I think it's interesting that you brought</b><b>up and I think this is true.</b><b>The girls that are doing</b><b>it, they just cut out faster.</b><b>But the boys are willing to string it along</b><b>further because it's about sex.</b><b>And it might be about</b><b>sex for the girl, too.</b><b>But that's all it is.</b><b>Wants no feels, emotions or anything.</b><b>She's willing to dip sooner.</b><b>Yeah, I think this was</b><b>because she gets the ache.</b><b>Yeah. Yeah. Especially in South Florida.</b><b>There's a lot of people down here.</b><b>There's a lot of</b><b>options. There's a lot of money.</b><b>There's a lot of people that can give you</b><b>really cool experiences.</b><b>So especially with girls, like guys will</b><b>spend a fuck ton of money on you.</b><b>Guys will take you out, they'll buy you</b><b>shit, they'll help you travel, etc.</b><b>So a lot of girls just have so many options</b><b>that they're like, well,</b><b>I got this rich guy that's</b><b>like kind of weird, but like,</b><b>they'll take me out on his yacht whenever I</b><b>want to go out on it.</b><b>So I'll keep him around.</b><b>And that's that's the competition, right?</b><b>These guys that are willing to rent a</b><b>Ferrari or Lambo for the weekend</b><b>and give the perception of</b><b>they've got all this money.</b><b>Yeah. But maybe they own it</b><b>or they own it. Yeah. Yeah.</b><b>I think that's not just a detriment to</b><b>though, to the young men,</b><b>but to the young women, too, because those</b><b>young women are going to be</b><b>constantly enamored with the new shiny toy</b><b>and the new guy with the new shiny toy.</b><b>And eventually you have.</b><b>And I say this and I</b><b>know people get triggered.</b><b>You've given away your baby years.</b><b>With all those experiences,</b><b>but not with an authentic one.</b><b>So as much as it creates</b><b>unfair competition for</b><b>normal down to earth guys</b><b>that aren't renting Lambo's or own Lambo's</b><b>or whatever, but the girls,</b><b>it's almost like a dopamine hit, right?</b><b>Yeah. You know, the</b><b>new thing, the new thing.</b><b>And then eventually, you</b><b>know, you might have wasted</b><b>10 to 15 years with those experiences as</b><b>fun and as cool as they were.</b><b>It can be addicting probably.</b><b>And you don't realize how long you've been</b><b>doing it until all of a sudden</b><b>you wake up one day and</b><b>you're like, oh, God, I want to.</b><b>You know, I'd like to have a relationship.</b><b>I'd like to get married, like to have kids.</b><b>So I think for girls, that's a cautionary</b><b>tale of go have go have fun.</b><b>Enjoy yourself.</b><b>But have a goal.</b><b>Like be aware of timing and</b><b>maybe set a goal like, OK,</b><b>I'm going to do this for two years and then</b><b>I'm going to make an adjustment.</b><b>You know, I don't think that's</b><b>unrealistic for your generation.</b><b>I don't know, though.</b><b>There may be some young girls that are</b><b>would be bothered by me saying that,</b><b>that I'm not meaning to</b><b>press them or anything.</b><b>I just it's almost like</b><b>respect their goals and really</b><b>define them and not get caught up in</b><b>because it can be a</b><b>fast life doing all that.</b><b>Yeah. And before you know it, three years</b><b>have gone by, you know,</b><b>and for you guys to, you know, and getting</b><b>caught up in that next thing,</b><b>next thing and all that. So and social</b><b>media doesn't help with that.</b><b>Yeah. Because everyone looks so happy.</b><b>Yeah. Social media and everyone's vacation</b><b>is the greatest vacation of all time.</b><b>Yeah. And everyone's living a cooler, more</b><b>fun life than you are on social media.</b><b>But like you get to know some of these</b><b>people and it's like, that's tough.</b><b>What you're doing, you're just putting up a</b><b>facade on social media.</b><b>And there's plenty of</b><b>people that aren't like that.</b><b>And there's plenty of</b><b>examples that aren't like that.</b><b>But there's also plenty that are.</b><b>Yeah. No, the FOMO is real.</b><b>And it's I think with maturity comes a</b><b>realization that it's not real,</b><b>that what they're doing is</b><b>not real. It's an illusion.</b><b>Signaling. Yes, exactly. Exactly.</b><b>So do you do you believe in or do you</b><b>I guess this chivalry</b><b>a part of your dating?</b><b>Like, do you open the door, open the car</b><b>door, do you do all those things?</b><b>Yeah, absolutely. Do you what about pain?</b><b>Guy pays for everything</b><b>right off the bat early on. Yes.</b><b>Now, do you once you start dating, I think</b><b>that can shift a little bit</b><b>when you're like in an</b><b>established relationship.</b><b>I think it's you see it</b><b>often. It's pretty normal.</b><b>My relationships have been like that, where</b><b>when you start dating a girl,</b><b>what even if it's something like you're</b><b>going out to Chipotle and she's like,</b><b>yeah, you paid for our date</b><b>yesterday. I'll buy this meal.</b><b>Yeah, I think that's pretty common.</b><b>But early on, I don't think you're going to</b><b>take out a girl and expect her to pay.</b><b>And I don't think it</b><b>makes sense for you to.</b><b>Now, do you subscribe to the new coffee</b><b>date thing people are doing</b><b>where the first day it's a coffee date, not</b><b>a commitment to a dinner?</b><b>I get it for sure.</b><b>I haven't been on a coffee date before,</b><b>but I completely understand</b><b>that. Yeah, I have a question.</b><b>I always thought it's not a bad move.</b><b>It's like where you go to a</b><b>coffee shop instead of dinner.</b><b>So do you want to meet</b><b>at two o'clock or one day?</b><b>Shorter time. Yeah.</b><b>Quicker, quicker in and out. Exactly.</b><b>Yeah, almost like a little</b><b>form of speed dating in a way.</b><b>Yeah. Is that a kind of like</b><b>that wouldn't be like if you're</b><b>it could be I guess that it</b><b>fits in all types of scenarios.</b><b>But is that more of a tinder</b><b>thing or something like that?</b><b>No, first first date, just the first day.</b><b>Well, I mean, if you meet on a dating app,</b><b>but you can even do it on in a DM</b><b>asking someone out or like or face to face,</b><b>like I'll get in touch with you.</b><b>A nice breaker.</b><b>Yeah, I think it's for both.</b><b>Like you're not committing fully to dinner.</b><b>So if like one of you doesn't like the</b><b>other, you can get out of there</b><b>in like an hour as</b><b>opposed to a full dinner.</b><b>And also if the guy's pain, it's less of a</b><b>financial obligation.</b><b>Yeah. And then the</b><b>second date, usually dinner.</b><b>So you semi time box the</b><b>event into an hour or two coffee</b><b>with the mutual understanding</b><b>it's ending in an hour or two.</b><b>No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.</b><b>What I think it is is that a lot of times,</b><b>either whether a lot of</b><b>times it's drinks, not dinner.</b><b>And even if it is dinner, a lot of time</b><b>there's alcohol involved</b><b>and people get loose, have fun on alcohol</b><b>and you might make a bad decision.</b><b>Right. Coffee date, you're drinking coffee,</b><b>you're there, you're aware.</b><b>Nothing's getting past you.</b><b>So you can actually get a feel for someone.</b><b>I think that's what the difference is.</b><b>Instead of going out and getting a little</b><b>drunk and good music,</b><b>we're having a good time.</b><b>Yeah, it sounds like a very</b><b>healthy, sober, real experience.</b><b>No, I think I think it's great.</b><b>And as far as timing, if it's going well,</b><b>it could go four hours</b><b>if you wanted to. I don't think.</b><b>But if it's not, you can get out of there.</b><b>But I have seen and I do know of people</b><b>this has happened to in real life,</b><b>not just on social media, where there's</b><b>guys that are wanting</b><b>to split the coffee date bill.</b><b>So the bill's like fifteen dollars.</b><b>You probably shouldn't be</b><b>taking a girl on a date.</b><b>I know. Right.</b><b>Don't you think now that's a red flag?</b><b>Yeah, I would think that's a red flag.</b><b>You can't pick up this fifteen dollar tab.</b><b>Then I however much it is,</b><b>it's you ask the girl on a date.</b><b>Yes. You're the man.</b><b>And this probably is going to get people</b><b>online saying, well, it's not true.</b><b>It doesn't matter if</b><b>you're a man or woman. It does.</b><b>You're the man you're paying.</b><b>Well, if you're asking, you've asked her.</b><b>So your host, what if you're asking her?</b><b>What if she asks, I'm with you for the</b><b>record, 100 percent men should pay</b><b>until they should just pay.</b><b>It's just the way it is agreed.</b><b>But what if they do ask is does that flip</b><b>it like for the first date?</b><b>Yeah. No, no.</b><b>I mean, no, I think a guy should.</b><b>Well, for him and I, it doesn't.</b><b>I'm with you. I agree, too.</b><b>But does it like I mean, if I asked the guy</b><b>on a day, we're going back.</b><b>If I asked the guy on a date.</b><b>I might offer to split it.</b><b>If I asked the guy on a date, if I plan it</b><b>and I was like, let's go, I might</b><b>offered I might take care</b><b>of my ticket or whatever.</b><b>But I wouldn't pay for</b><b>his. That would feel weird.</b><b>Yeah. But then I would</b><b>want him to know I get it.</b><b>You and I are from a different generation.</b><b>And Henry like, no, no, no, I got it.</b><b>But yeah, I think if I plan, if I asked the</b><b>date, then I would, you know,</b><b>but I don't know what year it's the thing</b><b>now with like my friend group</b><b>and my generation, and it's</b><b>like you take a girl out on a date</b><b>and the check comes and she kind of reaches</b><b>for it or like offers split it.</b><b>There's a sense of appreciation there, but</b><b>she's not going to pay for it.</b><b>Right. I'm not personally, I'm</b><b>not going to let her pay for it.</b><b>But like a girl that the</b><b>check comes and she's like,</b><b>do you want to split it or I'll get it or</b><b>just grabs it or something like that?</b><b>I can definitely have a</b><b>sense of appreciation there.</b><b>But at the end of the day,</b><b>I'm not going to let them pay.</b><b>So that's a green flag for a guy because</b><b>now you know you're not just getting used</b><b>per se or she's just good. Yeah. Yeah.</b><b>Now, what is she doesn't do that, though?</b><b>She sits there. Is that bad?</b><b>No, not for me. OK. OK. Not for me.</b><b>I don't expect anything</b><b>when it comes to that. Yeah.</b><b>I'm paying. That's how I was raised.</b><b>My dad was like that, whether it was</b><b>with my mom or my mom's family or my mom's</b><b>friends or anything like that.</b><b>My dad's pain. Mm hmm. Right.</b><b>Just women. Yeah. Yeah.</b><b>Or even if my we went out with</b><b>my dad, my mom and her brother.</b><b>My dad's going to pay. OK. Yeah. He's just</b><b>like that. Yeah. Yeah.</b><b>And that's where I get it from. Yeah.</b><b>Now, what about do you find that a lot?</b><b>I just can't imagine this in your circle.</b><b>But there are a lot of men out there that</b><b>are have that feeling.</b><b>If they pay for a dinner, let's say that</b><b>she should be coming back to his place.</b><b>And when they don't when the</b><b>girl doesn't, they feel used.</b><b>They feel they were</b><b>used for a dinner. Yeah.</b><b>Is that something you've</b><b>heard about it? Yes, for sure.</b><b>And does that make any sense to you?</b><b>It depends. Like we're</b><b>talking a second date, maybe.</b><b>Yeah, I mean, it just depends.</b><b>I mean, you can't expect anything.</b><b>You can't go in</b><b>expecting sex like I get it.</b><b>I don't think it's necessarily that you</b><b>feel like you're used.</b><b>I think that's what you tell yourself to</b><b>make yourself feel better.</b><b>Like if a girl wanted to go home and have</b><b>sex with your fucking,</b><b>she's going to do that. Right. OK.</b><b>But sometimes you'll take a</b><b>girl out, you think it went well.</b><b>She doesn't think it went well.</b><b>And you're like, well, she</b><b>didn't come home with me.</b><b>She used me. It's like, no.</b><b>The defense mechanism. Exactly.</b><b>There's a coping mechanism.</b><b>You need rejection.</b><b>So but what about if a</b><b>girl does like the guy,</b><b>but she's just not she</b><b>has a thing for herself.</b><b>I don't have sex until I'm at</b><b>this certain point with the guy.</b><b>So it's not rejection of him.</b><b>Like, do guys automatically</b><b>view not having sex as rejection,</b><b>where maybe it's just her</b><b>timeline, but she still likes the guy.</b><b>Do they ever think of that?</b><b>A lot of guys will</b><b>respect them like a girl more</b><b>if they don't go home with</b><b>them right away and they hate it.</b><b>But deep down, that's the feeling.</b><b>So it's a weird thing.</b><b>They're upset that she didn't</b><b>go home with them and say, well,</b><b>she was maybe using me, but they also</b><b>respect her for not going home with them.</b><b>Yeah, I don't know if it's</b><b>respect, but it creates like.</b><b>I need to take her out again.</b><b>I need to get to know her</b><b>better. I need to do this.</b><b>I need to do that. So that happens often.</b><b>And it just sticks in your head, right?</b><b>Like I took this girl out.</b><b>We had a great time. Like, why?</b><b>Why didn't she want to go home with me?</b><b>Why didn't you want to kiss me?</b><b>Why didn't you want to have sex with me?</b><b>Whatever it is.</b><b>But it definitely creates</b><b>like a another spark in there</b><b>where you're like, all right,</b><b>this is like it's interesting.</b><b>This is a challenge.</b><b>That's a good way to challenge.</b><b>Is the level of respect</b><b>there, too, I think the guy has.</b><b>Yeah, I agree. Yeah.</b><b>And I think that easy.</b><b>I think it's on the inverse side.</b><b>It's more more so evident</b><b>where if you take a girl out and you like</b><b>her a lot first night,</b><b>she goes home with you.</b><b>A lot of guys, not all guys,</b><b>but a lot of guys are like,</b><b>that was too easy. Yeah.</b><b>I'm not if she does it</b><b>with me, she'll do it.</b><b>I'm nothing special to</b><b>do with everybody else.</b><b>So for girls, that's an interesting thing,</b><b>because if they're not going to just if</b><b>they have that for themselves,</b><b>I don't just sleep with a guy.</b><b>There needs to be a timeline here.</b><b>But also the guy's pain.</b><b>It's it's a weird thing where</b><b>how how long can we go where?</b><b>Where he doesn't feel used and stop because</b><b>he thinks she's just for meals,</b><b>you know, where she can continue to respect</b><b>herself till she's reached that point.</b><b>I guess the texting and the talking would</b><b>be building in between there</b><b>so he would realize he's not being used.</b><b>She doesn't like him.</b><b>She's just not taking that step physically.</b><b>Does that make sense?</b><b>Yeah, it's all communication. Yeah. Yeah.</b><b>You can leave a first date.</b><b>They don't go home with you or you don't</b><b>get what you were hoping for.</b><b>But, you know, you're like,</b><b>yeah, that was a great first day.</b><b>We're definitely going out again.</b><b>I like her. She likes me.</b><b>I respect her. She respects me.</b><b>So it's all a communication thing.</b><b>Like a girl can just tell you, listen.</b><b>Up front, I'm not going</b><b>to fuck you tonight. Right.</b><b>It's not going to happen. Yeah.</b><b>And does that ruin the night for a guy?</b><b>You think about it for sure.</b><b>I was going to ask if</b><b>there is room for that</b><b>transparency to have that conversation to</b><b>be like, look, I don't</b><b>I don't have sex for the first 30 days.</b><b>Yeah. If you're cool with that, we're cool.</b><b>If not, I'm cool with like, is that awkward</b><b>or can a girl say that?</b><b>It depends on the guy.</b><b>Yeah, it's just some</b><b>guys just can't take it.</b><b>Some guys will do that</b><b>as a challenge. Yeah.</b><b>And I think what makes that different or</b><b>awkward is that a lot of girls</b><b>will tell you that up front, they'll go</b><b>home with you that night. Oh.</b><b>So then you're like, yeah. Yeah.</b><b>So it just depends.</b><b>There's nuance to everything.</b><b>You're right. You're right.</b><b>But yeah. Yeah.</b><b>I don't think it's a it's a</b><b>deal breaker for a lot of guys.</b><b>I think like you come home from a date.</b><b>It wasn't great. The girl</b><b>didn't go home with you.</b><b>You're coming home to your friends and</b><b>you're like, fuck, man.</b><b>Yeah. Why didn't she go home with me?</b><b>I need to like figure it out. Yeah.</b><b>I really like her for these reasons.</b><b>It makes you think about shit more. Yeah.</b><b>You know what I mean?</b><b>Like if you're taking out a</b><b>girl first date and you're</b><b>getting what you want, you're having sex,</b><b>oftentimes you go home and you're like</b><b>mission accomplished. Right.</b><b>You know what I mean? Right. Yeah.</b><b>It leaves less room for</b><b>you to think about shit.</b><b>It's almost like if she waits, then it</b><b>actually forces men to think further</b><b>and raise the level here of their thought</b><b>process with the whole thing.</b><b>Yeah. Where if you feed that</b><b>initial need, it's been satisfied</b><b>and they're not going to</b><b>put much more thought into it.</b><b>You're bored. Yeah.</b><b>This is why I say I do think girls have a</b><b>lot of control over how these things go.</b><b>Just by withholding. I</b><b>do not to do it that way.</b><b>I do think it's a respect</b><b>thing that I'm old school.</b><b>But I think let there be room for growth in</b><b>other areas because obviously</b><b>that area is going to be fine.</b><b>But let other things kind of grow out of</b><b>this too before you finally take that</b><b>step. Yeah. I guess.</b><b>Were you going to say I</b><b>forget what I was going to say.</b><b>It's all good. Do you have anything else</b><b>you want to ask before</b><b>I ask my last question?</b><b>Sure. Just to go back to the Miami days,</b><b>we're in Miami and skipped</b><b>over to St. Pete, but in Miami,</b><b>it's such a cultural melting pot.</b><b>You mentioned the Hispanic influence, but</b><b>there's it's one of my favorite things</b><b>about South Florida is</b><b>the multiculturalism.</b><b>Me too. If you compare it to Morocco.</b><b>Does Morocco have that same multicultural</b><b>vibe and energy of of like,</b><b>I think of Casablanca as this exotic spot</b><b>in some ways, in American opinion or</b><b>perspective, are they</b><b>similar in that sense?</b><b>Very much so. Yeah.</b><b>I mean, it's I guess it's the same here.</b><b>The dominant presence is Moroccans, right?</b><b>But you have everything you have other</b><b>Arabic people there from like Lebanon,</b><b>Egypt, Algeria, Tunisia.</b><b>You have foreigners from Europe, from the</b><b>U.S., from anywhere in the world.</b><b>And it's a huge city and</b><b>it's a big melting pot.</b><b>So very much so. And I always say Miami</b><b>reminds me of Casablanca a lot.</b><b>Yeah. Yeah. That's kind of a vibrant.</b><b>Does it have that same vibrant,</b><b>flashing nightlife that</b><b>Miami does in some ways or?</b><b>Not as much as Miami, but</b><b>I guess Miami is unique.</b><b>And Miami's. Yeah. Yeah.</b><b>Like I always say this, like people are</b><b>like, I went to the best club in Miami.</b><b>I'm like, so you went to the best club in</b><b>the world pretty much.</b><b>Yeah. You know what I mean?</b><b>But it definitely does have that nightlife,</b><b>that outgoing people,</b><b>ability to meet a lot of people. Yeah.</b><b>But I don't think most places you can</b><b>compare to Miami. Yeah.</b><b>One other question. I don't</b><b>know if we closed on this,</b><b>but are there any good</b><b>Moroccan restaurants here?</b><b>He means up by us.</b><b>Up by us.</b><b>Is there anything in Fort Lauderdale or?</b><b>We've got the one in Miami.</b><b>The one in Miami.</b><b>Anything Boynton, West Palm, Boca.</b><b>West Palm for sure has one.</b><b>I don't know of one, but I</b><b>would think they have one.</b><b>Off the top of my</b><b>head, I can't think of any.</b><b>Yeah. We can definitely look it up.</b><b>The one in Miami.</b><b>We'll have to go check it</b><b>out, make a trip down there.</b><b>I highly recommend it. It's really great.</b><b>Yeah. Let's do that.</b><b>Any other questions?</b><b>OK, so my last question is always where do</b><b>you see yourself in five years?</b><b>I envision myself location wise in St.</b><b>Pete, St. Petersburg, around the family.</b><b>But can you elaborate on that?</b><b>What do you what do you mean?</b><b>Just in general, from what sense like</b><b>career wise, personal wise,</b><b>if you had to fast forward five years, how</b><b>old will you be in five years?</b><b>21.</b><b>31.</b><b>31. So you'd be in your early 30s.</b><b>So in any area or all areas, where do you</b><b>what's your daily life?</b><b>Anything career wise, I hope to still be</b><b>with the same company I'm at.</b><b>Five years, I hope to be in the same role,</b><b>but a higher tier of it.</b><b>So I think I want to stay in sales for more</b><b>than five more years.</b><b>That's for sure.</b><b>Personally.</b><b>Settle down with the woman.</b><b>Whether that's married or whether that's</b><b>dating, just have someone.</b><b>That's my goal, my plan.</b><b>And then from a family standpoint, just</b><b>taking care of everyone.</b><b>Yeah. Living near your</b><b>dad and brother over there.</b><b>Yeah, I think that's great.</b><b>My nephew will be six.</b><b>Wow. Being scouted by</b><b>professional soccer teams.</b><b>But no, I'm kidding.</b><b>But yeah, just being around the family,</b><b>getting closer with the family.</b><b>As I've gotten older, you realize how much</b><b>more that's important.</b><b>And yeah, taking care of my people.</b><b>Yeah. Having a good amount of</b><b>money saved up, having a house.</b><b>Yes, for great goals.</b><b>Those are wonderful goals.</b><b>And that would, you know, that would be an</b><b>amazing way to start your 30s.</b><b>So because every I think every decade has</b><b>its meanings, its lessons</b><b>and its goals and accomplishments.</b><b>And it's always good as you get closer to</b><b>the next one to kind of think, OK,</b><b>what do I want to get out of this decade?</b><b>Because before you know it,</b><b>you're on to the next decade.</b><b>And I always think that's a nice way to</b><b>really live an authentic life,</b><b>is to live an intentionally and not just</b><b>kind of let it happen.</b><b>I agree. So I think those are great goals.</b><b>And we're so, so happy that you joined us</b><b>today and you shared your story.</b><b>And you opened the window a little bit into</b><b>Morocco for our listeners,</b><b>because I don't think most</b><b>people haven't been there.</b><b>And it's kind of a very</b><b>mysterious place for at least,</b><b>I think, a lot of people, you know, I can</b><b>say for us, you know, what?</b><b>I've learned so much from</b><b>knowing you. I've learned a lot.</b><b>But even today, I learned some more.</b><b>So just to give us that glimpse and then</b><b>the miracle with your</b><b>father. Yeah, that's awesome.</b><b>I mean, that's just absolutely amazing.</b><b>And I know that there will be listeners</b><b>that that could be life changing</b><b>for them to have</b><b>learned that today from you.</b><b>So just sharing that alone. Yeah.</b><b>So absolutely.</b><b>My thing is, if you want</b><b>to go to Morocco, go there.</b><b>It's safe. They treat tourists very well.</b><b>You can do whatever you want there, whether</b><b>it's just being a tourist,</b><b>trying to blend into the culture, whether</b><b>you want to go party there,</b><b>whether you want to go on excursions.</b><b>There's options for everything</b><b>and it's affordable and safe.</b><b>I highly, highly recommend it.</b><b>From the my dad's standpoint, medical</b><b>standpoint, it is life changing.</b><b>And I really do hope one</b><b>person learns about that</b><b>because my dad's had the disease forever</b><b>and it took him a very long time</b><b>to learn about it. Yeah.</b><b>It's still bleeding edge.</b><b>It's still very new.</b><b>But I can tell you from personal</b><b>experience, it works.</b><b>And it's given my dad his life back.</b><b>So if you know anyone that's</b><b>been affected by Parkinson's</b><b>or if you're affected by Parkinson's,</b><b>definitely look at that very seriously.</b><b>Yeah. An invasive surgery.</b><b>But you can find a good doctor that'll</b><b>that'll be able to pull it off.</b><b>Yeah. And yeah, to wrap it up, I've been</b><b>looking forward to this</b><b>for a very long time. I</b><b>appreciate you guys having me.</b><b>I think we've all had a lot of</b><b>conversations throughout our years</b><b>of friendship, my friendship with Nate.</b><b>So it's great to be on here.</b><b>Yeah, no. And it's been really awesome to</b><b>hear about your journey and the challenges</b><b>that you encountered.</b><b>You know, I didn't realize the different</b><b>things that you'd gone through.</b><b>And then just to see how</b><b>that led you up to Tallahassee</b><b>and aided you when you were</b><b>presented with that challenge.</b><b>I'm so impressed with, you know, most kids</b><b>know before they start college</b><b>if they're going to have to</b><b>put themselves through college.</b><b>So the fact that you learn</b><b>that while you're already there</b><b>and then pulled it off, it's so impressive.</b><b>I appreciate it. Really. It really is.</b><b>It's so impressive.</b><b>So I actually have a question. Yeah.</b><b>And it just made me think about it,</b><b>because now just talking to you and</b><b>learning more about your background</b><b>makes me better understand</b><b>why you're such a hustler.</b><b>And it had been that way.</b><b>What advice would you give to someone your</b><b>age that's either coming out of college</b><b>or trying to figure their their</b><b>professional life out?</b><b>Do you have any advice you would give to</b><b>that that makes sense or would resonate?</b><b>No one's going to save you.</b><b>You got to figure out your own shit.</b><b>You may you're going to have support.</b><b>I hope you have support</b><b>from your family and friends.</b><b>But at the end of the day, it's your life</b><b>and you need to figure it out.</b><b>Don't be scared to take risks.</b><b>They pay off. And worst thing that could</b><b>happen is you learn</b><b>something about yourself</b><b>and about what you were trying to do.</b><b>So take risks and don't be scared to</b><b>experiment with shit,</b><b>whether it's your career, whether it's</b><b>friends, whether it's you personally,</b><b>you'll figure out a lot of stuff about you</b><b>throughout the way. And.</b><b>Just work hard and stuff will fall in line.</b><b>I think if you have good discipline, you</b><b>have a good routine, you work hard.</b><b>Things will work out for</b><b>you, especially in this country.</b><b>So just pursue that.</b><b>It's great advice.</b><b>And I think your 20s are a great decade to</b><b>do all those things you</b><b>talked about for sure,</b><b>to start all that off.</b><b>So that's great advice.</b><b>I think on that note,</b><b>we'll close. We'll close.</b><b>But again, thank you, Ali, for sharing your</b><b>story, for coming here today.</b><b>And we look forward to having you back in</b><b>the future and seeing where you're at.</b><b>And for our listeners, please leave any</b><b>comments or questions.</b><b>And if you have any questions about the</b><b>surgery that Ali's dad had,</b><b>we'll definitely make sure that we get that</b><b>information to Ali so</b><b>we can get a good answer.</b><b>He can answer you directly.</b><b>And if you have any</b><b>questions about Morocco, same thing.</b><b>Ali will see this stuff on social media or</b><b>we will get the answers for you.</b><b>So please feel free to leave those and we</b><b>will see you next time.</b><b>Bye.</b>